Looking around for something nice I found a pair of shoes that I wanted to buy. The price tag was Dhs 230. Off I went to the cash counter and was all ready to pay when I remembered that I could get that discount. So, I asked the cashier to give me the discount and let me pay Dhs 200 only.

Unfortunately, their policy clearly stated that to get the Dhs 100 discount, customers had to spend Dhs 300. The salesman at the cash counter told me that I was free to pick up something else for Dhs 70, to get the Dhs 100 discount. I tried to explain that it made no sense for them but a procedure is a procedure and had to be followed.

On his insistence I picked up five pairs of socks making the total bill Dhs 300. I paid Dhs 200 and walked out with 5 pairs of socks free plus a Dhs 30 discount on the shoes!

I wondered what business sense that made for Shoe Citi. It made terrific sense for me though. I wonder whether it is because I am a finance geek. The salesman followed the set procedure and caused an unnecessary loss to his company and I went away laughing at bureaucracy.

So, the question is, should we follow a set procedure or directive, irrespective of consequences or should we apply common sense?

Success Tip #1. Hold a Contest: Everyone loves a contest. They’re fun, generate client interest and they can get attention from the media. You can send a press release announcing the contest, keep the media posted throughout and then let them know about the winner(s).

You can create a contest around your business birthday, when you release a new product or service, or to celebrate holidays. You can use local celebrities to serve as judges to boost visibility. Don’t forget to get contact information and email addresses for everyone who enters the contest. It’s a great way to add to your marketing list.

Success Tip #2. Use Social Media: I use Linked In, Facebook and Twitter. The key to success with these tools is to establish relationships with people online — don’t just sell to them — especially when you first meet. I have to admit, I resisted Twitter for a long time after I saw that many people would post the trivia of their life — I really didn’t care what time they got up or what they ate for breakfast.

I’m now a convert. Using social media is a great way to build your list and get noticed (you could also announce your contests here!). I have had people refer my work to their “friends” (that’s what you’re called when you join someone’s Facebook page). I am reaching people I never would have thought possible through these amazing networks.

No, I don’t fritter away my time. I spend an average of 15-20 minutes a day nurturing these networks. AND I don’t have to get dressed and drive anywhere to meet all these nice folks!

Success Tip #3. Write Press Releases: You can use press releases to announce the launch of your website or blog, to draw attention to a new service offering, your contests, industry groups you’re joining, and pro bono work. Make press releases a part of your marketing calendar. Type “how to write a press release” into Google and you’ll see plenty of samples and formatting tips.

Success Tip #1. Know What You Want to Say and Who You Want to Say It To: What is the main point you want to get across? My example is “Self employment is the best road to happiness — you absolutely can be paid to do the things you enjoy doing.” Who are you talking to? Is your ideal customer/client within your local geographic area or are they national? Get clear on who you love to serve. Individuals or businesses. Consider demographics: gender, age, income level, educational level, etc.

Success Tip #2. Define which media you want to approach – what are your customers/clients reading and listening to? Which magazines, blogs, ezines are they reading? What radio stations or podcasts do they listen to? Which social networking (Facebook, Linked In) groups are they participating in? What has their interest right now? What problems do they have?

Success Tip #3. Create your own media list. Here are great resources to get you started:

The Internet Public Library (http://www.ipl.org/div/news) lists newspapers for each state and all over the world. You can also choose subject areas and find blogs and groups you may want to get active in.

Technorati’s Top 100 Blogs (http://technorati.com/pop/blogs).

TVA Productions provides a media directory on their site with listings of major networks and cable programs. Once you identify those you’re interested in, you’ll need to Google to get current contact information.

MediaOnTwitter bwiki (http://www.mediaontwitter.com). This tool can help you find specific media contacts. And don’t be afraid to pick up the phone to call and ask for the appropriate contact person’s email address.

Bacon’s Media Directories: You can find these directories in the library: one for newspapers, one for magazines, one for TV/Cable, one for Internet — they’re pricey at about $495 each so you probably don’t want to get your own unless you’re doing a lot of research and “pitching”.

One such input is the Three Bucket Theory and I think this is relevant to a lot of others out there in the world and so would like to share this with everyone. Here goes!

A typical career spans three decades plus starting from the 20’s and going on till the 50’s. These thirty odd years should be split up into three buckets or segments of ten years each.

In the First Bucket, one needs to focus on learning. This learning should be all encompassing and not self limiting in any manner. One should have an open mind and learn about the working styles, organization styles, people, communication, teams, practical tips, etc. In short anything new and unknown needs to be explored and learnt in depth. Herein lies an inherent trap. Most youngsters who start their career are educated and have spent a past decade and a half learning or rather studying. Often, they mistake this studying to be a substitute for learning and more dangerously act as if there is very little if at all anything left to learn.

I quote an old Tamil adage: “What one learns is usually a fistful, whereas what is left to be learnt is an entire universe”. Anyone operating with this thought during the first bucket would stand to benefit immensely in the other buckets. A word of caution though — remember learning never stops throughout life. However, during the First Bucket the focus should be consciously on learning and not on designations, compensations, matching up to peers, besting colleagues, etc.

During the Second Bucket one has the opportunity to become an expert. If there has been extensive learning in the First Bucket one would be clear about all strengths and weaknesses and also is in a position to judge which of the learning can be leveraged best for personal success.

Becoming an expert requires one to have extensive and intensive experience in the field of choice, spanning first hand front line experience to overall strategic exposure. This gives one a true perspective and makes one an expert and also nurtures a deep rooted maturity with regards to all expertise.

Again during the Second Bucket the focus should be on exploring opportunities which allow in-depth exposure to fine tune expertise and one should not necessarily be driven by monetary or other considerations.

If these two phases are managed well and one develops true deep rooted expertise, the Third Bucket is the easiest part of a successful career. In this Bucket, one needs to work towards personal branding by sharing acquired expertise in public forums and through professional networks. When this is done properly all kinds of success including material prosperity follows even if one does not wish for the same.

Given the increasing life expectancy nowadays, I have added a Fourth Bucket to this theory. During the fourth phase one should consciously work towards giving back to the society. It could be by sharing one’s expertise and experience for public good through NGOs or with promising youngsters to create a better future.

My personal view is that there is no success formula and as such this should not be taken as gospel truth. This is a direction. Take it, craft it, mould it to suit your personality and hopefully you would create your own version of the Three Bucket Theory as pass it on to others.

To begin with the answer is darn simple. It’s only made complex by know-alls or know-nothings or know-half or know-half-but-don’t-know-which-halves. That means virtually all of us. Only a select few (one-in-a-million, according to some researchers) know what it is and benefit from it. Despair not, for now the secret will be revealed. Get ready to enjoy the alluring and elusive fruits of power, which till now, we only fantasized about. From the story of 5 brothers who lost everything in a bitter power struggle with their conniving cousins and had to spend 12 years in exile and 1 year in anonymity to learn the tricks of the trade to have a go at the throne. (You, oh lucky reader, need only the next 60 seconds to know what it takes).

For a good 11 years 11 months (to the 11th hour that is) the brothers kept shaking their heads in disbelief wondering what went wrong for such fate to befell them. Instead of enjoying the fruits of power they are on foot wandering in forests teeming with wild beasts, poisonous ivy, long days, dark nights and meandering thorny paths.

“What have we done wrong? We had everything going for us. We are the good ones. Lived by book almost and asked for what rightfully belonged to us. We are blessed by elders. Seen as a beacon of hope by our subjects. We were loved almost universally. Yet….”

Words failed them and they continued their journey part lamenting their fate and part taking in the beauty of nature, which the trappings of a life happily lived in palaces amongst seemingly well-wishers would have deprived them of. While musing thus and traveling further, one day they came across a tree with one fruit on it. It looked like a fruit for gods, and indeed it was, which they didn’t know at that time. Draupadi, their illustrious wife, feeling hungry by the long walk, said “I want it.”

Zip.

Her wish was their command and in a second the fruit made its way into her hand. She was on the verge of biting it.

Zwang.

Krishna, their mentor materialized there. “Stop” he said. “This fruit belongs to Durvasa, the angry saint. He alone decides whom he wants to give it to, and any ignoramus trying to savor it without his consent will get to know what living hell means. Put it back. Else you will have to face his wrath, for he is known to be short tempered.”

“How?” cried all in unison. “How on earth can we put the plucked thing back?”

Smiled Krishna. “Don’t worry. It needs to be offered the accumulated karma of your good deeds. Powered by that, this fruit here will go back and attach itself to the tree. All will be well.”

So first comes Draupadi, and offers her good karma, a result of her Chastity.

Zoom.

The fruit raises few feet in the air, well short of the branch it was plucked from. Shocked she looks at her husbands! “Oh, I thought the power of my karma alone would do the trick! Alas, such is not the case.”

The eldest brother Dharmaraja, epitome of Integrity, steps forward. Offers his bit and lo, the fruit still is far from being happily hanging in its original un-plucked state. One by one the remaining 4 brothers, each bringing to the table Strength, Valor, Humility and Trust do their bit, but the sum total of their contribution was still a few feet short. Steps forward Krishna, the wise mentor and offers part of his good karma and the fruit attaches itself to the tree, nothing amiss, everything as before.

“Wow! This is a miracle. How in heavens’ name did that happen?” The 6 voices rose in unison above the din of the forest sound FX.

Smiled Krishna. “Don’t worry; that there is Durvasa making his way to the tree now. We will talk after paying our respects to him.” Durvasa came. Durvasa saw. Durvasa conferred, the fruit unto the 5 brothers and their wife. “I know what happened. But you have collectively made the impossible, possible, so you have earned it. Eat it. The effects of it will last on you forever and you will enjoy the benefits of the throne shortly. Everything will work out smoothly henceforth.” Thus speaking the good and soothing words, the short-tempered but benevolent sage vanishes.

Content, with the vision of a good life ahead and the sweet taste of the fruit, the 5 brothers and their wife turn to Krishna their mentor, for enlightenment. Smiled Krishna. “Power”, he said, seating himself comfortably under the blessed tree, “is mistaken to be an easy prey to only one thing or the other from the following: Trust. Humility. Integrity. Strength. Chastity. Valor. (THIS CV).”

“You need a bit of guile to navigate through to the final course. In its absence everything else falls short of the ultimate goal. All the efforts come to naught. You are on the throes of Kaliyuga. The going will be tougher if you continue in the same naïve belief of THIS CV helping you. The dice will be loaded against you every time and you need to adopt new strategies. Add a dash of stealth and pepper it with practicality and the purpose will be served.

“I hope the path ahead is clear for you and that you have got your priorities right. Use this time to work on your weaknesses, add to your network, marshal troops and you will see what lies ahead. I as your mentor can see it. Glory be to thee!”

Oh wise reader, the era of Mahabharata has long ended. Kaliyuga has indeed entered. THIS CV is now some 3000+ years past its expiry date. It was once a necessary condition but not sufficient to get you what you desired. Now it’s an invalid anachronism.

The following powwow I heard not so long ago and I am sharing it with you in 7 parts; for I know you can only invest so much time at a stretch during working hours while not getting distracted from playing solitaire or forwarding the latest jokes.

“I don’t know. I am elated and at the same time feel empty. Have been doing everything right. Performed well. Went beyond the call of the duty. I am part of all key implementation projects. Boss smiles at me once in a while. Don’t extend my lunch breaks or take multiple caffeine/nicotine breaks. Yet right from being served coffee at the table to being invited for Boss’s regular outings; from figuring in the grapevine often to being called in for board meetings — everything seems to be eluding me,” groaned the newly promoted executive (NPE), stirring the contents of the glass placed in front of the accountant who asked how it felt to be kicked upstairs, after languishing for 2 years at the same position.

The accountant did his bit indulgently, to cheer up the kid for he liked the lad. This here was a young man with a sense of humor who after seeing him surreptitiously browsing an adult site chose to include him in his spicy e-mail forwarding list. Where others would have not batted an eyelid in appraising the top management of the same or worse giggle knowingly during lunch-time; this man here did what a kid with a golden heart and a funny bone does. The accountant filled the pauses occasioned by the limitation of NPE’s lungs with encouraging words. “I know you have it in you to move into the corner office some day. Carve out your niche. Don’t give a quarter. Guard your turf with zeal. The future is yours.”

“Thanks old man. I was working hard for it and have performed beyond anybody’s expectations. Still don’t know how long it will take to get fast-tracked onto the road ahead that is promising and paved with gold. Can see my own cabin, corporate credit card, car with chauffeur and conferences overseas. But are they mirages?” The NPE was slowly slipping.

“Listen. I know you are one of the best performers and the brightest chaps around in this organization, and god knows if all goes well, in little over a couple of years, instead of me passing your vouchers, you will be signing my salary cheques. But…” The accountant paused for the bearer to replenish his glass.

“But what? Do you think I will not make it?” ejaculated the NPE.

“NO!” Like numbers and revenues, the accountant, with equal dexterity, can mask the ugly underbelly and paint a beautiful picture. But there are occasions when he too can call a spade a spade. And this was one such occasion.

“And I will tell you why. Tell me, what do you think will get you promoted continuously and takes you to the high seat of power”?

“Multi-tasking. Ability to raise flag at the appropriate time. And provide solutions before others even identify the problems…” the NPE was like a man in possessed, banging his half-full glass (for he was an optimist albeit a naïve one) on the table. He could have gone on and on, for he was a man who never bunked a lecture at the business school or never failed to memorize key quotations from any self-help or career building guides.

The accountant knew that and moved in quickly.“That’s precisely what the donkey thought before he got a good hiding and was kicked out by his master whom he served loyally all his life,” said the accountant.

“What donkey? What rot is that all about, old man?” NPE was confused and slightly worked up.

“Okay, I know you dig management consultancies, self-help gurus, chicken soups with moving cheese, matrixes and clever acronyms more than anything else. So at the cost of the readers not following the 6 other stories beyond this one; for they will now know the formula for attaining power; I will proceed to lay it out.” He took a paper napkin and scribbled legibly (for accountants like doctors are not known for their calligraphic skills) to put down the following equation:
Power = Position + Positioning + Proximity + Personality + Perceptions + PR + Performance

“I don’t understand. I thought…” mumbled the NPE.

But he never got to complete the thought as the accountant interjected, “I know you won’t. So here munch on these peanuts and listen to the story.” Downing the contents of the half-empty (for the accountant sees things for what they are) glass and acknowledging the bearer who moved in quickly bringing in reinforcements, proceeded the accountant:

The Donkey who cared not for Position and put purchase on Performance
“In a small listless village, a fair representative of both listless and listed villages that dot our vast landscape lived a Dog and a Donkey working for a washerman running a profitable venture. The Donkey used to wake up early in the morning, nibble fast on little bits of grass leftover from the previous night to get ready to carry the dirty load. The Dog on the other hand, though wide awake used to rest its head on the crossed fore-legs, close its eyes and lie down till the washerman came in and patted on its back, played with its ears, left a freshly made roti and a bowl of milk in front of it, commending it for the long hours it has put in during the night and the successful outcome of its vigil (for his money and valuables were safe in the morning when checked).

At mid-day, the Donkey used to pass its time eating the grass that grew on the banks of the river, alone with no company, while the Dog relished its rice and soup with the washerman household. And then it would retire under the shady neem tree in the backyard, nibbling on a bone left to it by the doting daughter of the washerman. A completely sedentary and envious lifestyle. The most it used to do under the heading of ‘work’ was wag its tail to shoo the free-riding flies away.

During evening, when the washerman came home it used to lunge onto him, sniff and lick at his feet (for the Dog though shameless was never short on the shrewdness department). The Donkey used to amble in carrying in the washed load and its own fodder, never a murmur or a word of complaint. Subjugation personified.

Dinner was no different, the Dog was fed to the gills, for it had a long and arduous and most critical part to play while the Donkey ploughed through the forage before thinking of the day ahead. It thought the perseverance it showed and its performance would reward it in the long run. It was happy doing its bit for god, countrymen and its master. It reveled in the knowledge that its diligence is what kept the people close to each other and the world peace prevailing.

But for him, the whole world would have been one big bad chaotic place. Thus thought the good Donkey. The Dog along with its fellow dogs had formed a network, wherein only a few of them had to keep vigil across the village every night and raise a robust woof when anything unusual was spotted. This would alert the other dogs who would chip in joining the chorus; driving the unusual thing away and thereby meet their K-9 Performance Indicator. This usually helped the Dog catch more than its 40 winks during which it hated to be disturbed at all. On the day of its vigil, though, it condescended to spend time faffing around with Donkey. The faffing was mostly centered around how the master can do more to it for all the feet-licking it does day in and day out.

The Donkey though surprised, for it thought the Dog had it all, lent a patient ear mostly. On occasions, it used to berate the Dog for not doing its duty diligently, for instead of engaging in long conversations, it should be doing couple of rounds around the house. It (the Donkey) said it was thankful to the boss for letting it do its job without interfering and giving it timely fodder.

One day, on its vigil, while engaging in such a conversation, the Dog failed to notice an unusual movement near the boss’s house. The Donkey though caught it from the corner of its eye and alerted the dog to do the needful. The Dog said it was none of the Donkey’s business to tell him what he should be doing, and anyway it’s much better catching the thief with the loot, red-handed than scaring the thief off before he did any noticeable damage when the boss won’t be any wiser to the incursion. The logic didn’t go down well with the Donkey, as it believed that prevention is better than detention.

It rose to the occasion and let go in full throat that which its ilk is best known and derided for. It brayed aloud. The thief of course jumped a few inches higher in the air, for it was a new alert system that he came across, but nonetheless made good on foot, in the process upsetting the well lined flowerpots of the house. The whole household got up, the washerman was out with the stoutest of staffs in hand, bracing for for an intrusion if any, for the Dog hadn’t barked.

The Donkey, seeing the boss come from inside, ran towards him for a pat or hug or a piece of roti; for one doesn’t know what goodies a good and honest performance brings in. Drinking in one sweeping glance, the upset flowerpots, the nothing-wrong-with-the-world lackadaisical demeanor of the Dog, the boss deduced that the Donkey went out of its line. THADOOM… came down the staff on the hapless and unsuspecting lowly creature. “BRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY” a gut-wrenching cry reverberated through the air, making even the stoutest-at-heart Dog to wince a wee bit.

A wise owl perched on top of the neem tree, witness to the whole, clucked his tongue and thought aloud, “Multi-tasking blah. Raising flag blah blah. If only we all render what our respective positions demand from us rather than being slaves to conscience.”

“I get it, so you will suffer if you try doing good for the boss,” said the now sober NPE.

“You got it from the Donkey’s perspective, which is good but not great. Look at it from the Dog’s point of view if you want to be on the winning and powerful end of the bargain.”

“Mmm…there’s something in that,” admitted the NPE.

“Hang on, here comes our patron saint of spirits to serve another round of salvation. By the end of it all my boy, you will be a true man(ager),” promised the accountant while adjusting himself comfortably in the chair. He then proceeded to enlighten him with another story.

This article focuses on one important aspect of your business – who you serve.  Here’s an exercise I did when I first got started and if I find myself attracting people who are not ideal for me to serve. I revisit my vision  very often to keep my ideals clear.

I encourage you to do this process (or call it a game if you like!) in a chair where you would typically work.  If possible, have a second chair next to yours. Now think back to a client you’ve had in the past who was ideal for you or at least as close to ideal as possible.  Consider all the interactions you had with this person.  What was it you enjoyed about serving this person?  What are the positive qualities, attributes, and characteristics of this person?

Take out a piece of paper or computer document and write a list of all these qualities, attributes and characteristics of your ideal client.

For example, my ideal client: has a sense of humor; is interested in his/her spiritual development; takes action; values my time as well as their time; possesses and demonstrates mental well being; is intelligent and has common sense; understand and demonstrate that he/she deserves to be successful; has a financial cushion allowing them to buy my products and services; wants me to be successful and make a profit; subscribes to my weekly ezine; enjoys referring my services to others; has realistic expectations about what can be achieved and when; has clarity and focus; are open-minded; is heart-centered; is a learner; is true to himself/herself.

Now, if you can, switch chairs – put yourself in your client’s chair.  Ask your ideal client these questions: What are they struggling with that brought them to you? What is the biggest change they experienced as a result of the wonderful work they did with you?  What are the results they have now as a result of their work with you?

Next, make a list of at least 10 problems your ideal clients/customers want to solve.  What change/breakthrough do they want to experience and are they willing to pay you to help them get there?  List 10 results they could get from working with you.

Once you are clear on their challenges and results you deliver, you will not only be setting into motion the attraction factor – you now also have plenty of authentic words to use in your marketing materials!

Speaking with good purpose means conversing with others in a way that is honest, straightforward, and with the aim of building better relationships.

Take for example the following phrase: “You’re so sloppy. Your work area is such a mess.”

This is likely to antagonise the person to whom it is directed who will most likely respond in the same manner (since behaviour breeds behaviour) or go on the defensive. Either way, your point will be defended or denied and the conversation, to say nothing of the relationship, will pretty quickly be over.

If, on the other hand, you worked out in advance that you really needed the other person to know how you felt and what you wanted them to do, you could phrase the same message in the following way which leaks no anger or put-down: “I find it really hard to share an office with you because we have such different ideas about organisation.”

Now, you have the basis for a much better working arrangement.

Bobby DePorter, the president of Quantum Learning Network, says that there are many ways we can learn how to speak with good purpose. Here are 3…

1. a “No Tolerance to Gossip” policy, since gossip is exactly the opposite of speaking with good intent.
2. letting people know your intent when you speak. So, instead of the slightly sinister-sounding “Have you got a minute?”, use visible communication and let them know what’s on your mind, as in “Have you got a minute to talk about the Jones’ contract…?”
3. avoiding shut-downs by turning the conversation from them to you. So, if someone is telling you about a problem they’ve got, don’t “me-too” them (“Yeah, I know what you mean. The same thing happened to me…”) and don’t give them your solutions (“If I were you…”).

Marshall Thurber, the real estate mogul, has a rule in his office: “If it doesn’t serve, don’t say it.” When he finds anyone breaking this rule, with gossip, negativity, or not thinking before opening their mouth, the culprit has to put a $20 in the charity box.

The result is not only that people stop saying things that are hurtful, malicious, or just plain unnecessary. They stop thinking them too.

In truth, this isn’t a problem just for new trainers. Us old ones also experience it from time to time.

My answer is that, if you are going to spend a day or more with people who perhaps don’t know you too well, you need to become a skilled rapport-builder.

On the ManageTrainLearn Customer Care courses, we put rapport-building at the top of the customer communication skills. It’s one of those skills that have lots of sub-skills, all of which can be practised on their own. These include:

1. finding something in common with your trainees
2. displaying empathy with their problems
3. using small talk to break down the barriers
4. dropping people’s names into the conversation in understated ways
5. using humour to bond with them
6. showing them you’re just like them through mirroring, resonance and pacing
7. respecting them.

My favourite story about building rapport comes from self-development guru, Anthony Robbins, and is called “Oops!”

It might serve as a reminder of how to click with your trainees, even if they start off in mischievous mood.

“A class of schoolchildren decided one morning to play a prank on their new teacher who was late in arriving. At a pre-arranged moment when she eventually came in and reached her desk, all the children dropped their books on the floor.

Noticing at once what was going on, and determined not to play the part assigned to her, the teacher put down her chalk, picked up her own book, and, as the children all waited to see what she would do, accidentally dropped it too.

“Sorry I’m late,” she said, picking up the book. “Let’s start at page 23.” And she continued as if nothing had happened.

From that moment on, she had the children eating out of her hand.

If research is anything to go by, the answer will be, not as much as you should have done.

We’re told that people are so overwhelmed by the gloom they read and hear on the TV and newspapers that we’re forgetting to laugh.

I say “forgetting” because, as kids, we were masters at laughing. Research, again, suggests that, while adults laugh on average 15 times a day, small children manage up to 400 laughs a day.

On our Creativity courses at ManageTrainLearn, we produce evidence that suggests that the more you laugh at work the more creative you are.

Goran Ekvall, professor of organisational psychology at Lund University in Sweden, says that laughter is an essential ingredient for workplace innovation. When comparing the creativity of various departments of a Swedish newspaper, Ekvall found that the most creative teams were those that had a high level of laughter and humour.

This is why Tom Peters says that you can measure an organisation’s creativity from its laughometer.

There are many other reasons why laughter is good for you.

* laughter releases serotonin, the “feel-good” hormone, into your brain
* laughter helps you connect to others. It’s one of the best rapport-building tools around.
* laughter massages your inner organs
* laughter can help you lose weight by burning off fat
* laughter helps your immune system work better.

Madhuri Kataria, who created the idea of World Laughter Day, says, “There is an epidemic of seriousness that is raging all over the world. People seem to think that being grim-faced and serious is the only way to show commitment at work.”

It reminds me of that Red Indian proverb, “When you get to heaven, most people ask themselves, “Why was I so serious?”.”

So, here, to raise your serotonin, build your team, and increase your organisation’s creativity, is one of my favourite jokes of the moment. Read it and laugh. Or read it 400 times today and laugh.

A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.” “But I’m a college graduate.” the young man replied indignantly. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom, I’ll show you how.”

Editor’s Note: Here are some of the cutest things our reader’s kids have said. They will provide ample smiles and laughs we reckon. Enjoy!

The report, in its introduction, sets itself out to report on the potential benefits of engagement for companies, organisations and individual employees, and as it states later, it is not meant to be a “How to Become Engaged” guide, which is a pity because one of the themes that runs through the report is the confusion over what engagement is and the effect that it has on performance.

The report has been created with reference to surveys of many individuals and organisations and the compilation of statistical evidence is awesome, but most of it appears to have been gathered from the same people who are suffering confusion about what engagement is.

There is no feel in this report about what a phenomenal difference an engaged workforce  makes, no understanding of the market dominance that comes with engagement or the flexibility, imagination and pride that an engaged workforce generates.

The engaged workforce is the result of an extremely simple change in the way that managers manage and the result of this change is an earth shattering performance that cannot be competed with by any organisation running a conventional “Command and Control” management strategy.

We had in this report an opportunity to get rid of the confusion that surrounds the concept of engagement. What could have been an extraordinarily insightful initiative got bogged down with phrases of faint praise like this quote from the report: “Work is good for physical and mental wellbeing.”

This sounds like a line written by Harry Enfield for Mr Cholmondly-Warner, instead of the most exciting thing that has happened to our understanding of how to manage our workforce since the brilliant work of Douglas McGregor in his 1960 book, “The Human Side of Enterprise.”  To still be confused about what we should be doing fifty years later is not encouraging.

An employee at the phone company O2 is quoted as saying: “One thing that really stands out at the moment is the help and support we get from the management team. They’re really listening to their people.”  But in the feedback from their Head of  “Employee Involvement and Experience” there does not seem to be any acknowledgement of just how key this simple statement is.  It is as if what management are doing happened by accident, instead of being the cornerstone of a deliberate policy to change the way the workforce feel about what they do, to engage them.

Later in the report we are told that barriers to engagement are “confusion and misunderstanding,” but at the same time the report quotes Professor John Oliver of the Northern Leadership Alliance as saying: “Ninety Nine percent of failure to engage staff is due to management behaviour.”  There does not seem to be any confusion about that statement. The barriers to engagement are created by the behaviour of the managers!

On the first day at work every employee is engaged. They are happy to be there, they know the skills that they have to bring to work and they are looking forward to being able to use them to make a difference. The workforce’s natural engagement and desire to be effective is killed off by the things that management subsequently do to them.

The authors of the report tell us that there is no Silver Bullet that will cause people to engage. Perhaps that is because they are looking at the wrong end of the gun. Instead of looking for the bullet that will make people engage they should have been looking for the bullet that would stop people from disengaging, because that one is blindingly obvious. Find out what managers are doing that causes the workforce to disengage. Then stop them from doing it!

Vic Bayliss, the Director of Customer services at Westminster City Council got it in a nutshell. He said: “Staff have seen this as a programme that is being done with them, not to them.”  In this report Vic shows a rare perception that is unfortunately not shared by the bulk of the contributors.

I sincerely hope that this report does not have the effect of turning the concept of Engagement into the level of another “Management Good Idea” that will be used, as has been stated on several different occasions in the report, as a way to get the workforce to accept what management want them to do. When used in this way it becomes a cheap trick alongside many other “Management Good Ideas” that failed as soon as the workforce realised that management were just trying out another way to manipulate them.

Real engagement is the result of an ongoing collaboration between management and the workforce that produces the sorts of comments that were quoted by the O2 employee, not the result of a single initiative, survey or desire to manipulate.

Download the complete report from: http://www.davidzinger.com/employee-engagement-macleod-review-this-is-required-reading-3523/

What’s the ME brand?

Each of our ME brands are work in progress, and a sort of focused and continuous & RIGHT self-speak efforts are needed to communicate our thoughts through our brand ME. What we are seen as is what we communicate through our ME brand-speak.

Brand ME also makes sure that you communicate your position sans any ambiguity in the professional marketplace, and equally so, on the personal front – as a spouse, as a parent and as a socially responsible person.

To throw a little illustration, if you want you/your ME brand to be seen in as a successful professional in your space, then your walk and talk ought to be in sync with all that is needed to be so – both the hardware: the efforts needed, the knowledge & skills you ought to possess, and most of all the power to execute – you will carry all this and more to be seen and also be recognized as a successful or to-be-successful professional.

And the ME brand-speak shall be seen as the ‘software’ – that makes your hardware to be seen by all those in the relevant marketplace – be it the place of work, or home, or the social ecosystem.

Your ME brand speak will talk the entire walk you can do, amply well, and sort of loud and clear in the marketplace. Loud and clear does never mean being brash about what you are made off, but is being unambiguously clear about what would make you stand out and be different out there – be it in the kind of work you do, or the sales you can achieve, or the knowledge/core competence you will bring to the table in any place.

The ME brand speak would apply equally to any work and personal situation – you need to talk the walk you do and want to do as a parent, a child, a associate in any event and so on – this can be in any place, in any time and in any situation.

The ME brand speak is also so important and crucial in bridging the gap between perception and reality, more from the extent of the value you add in any given place. I am sure most of us agree that we did not get that deal, or get that hike or promotion or anything measurable and tangible just because it was not communicated or packaged in sync with what was delivered or done in reality.

The more you think of what you keep telling everyone or what all those around you see, is more of what your ME brand-speak is. Whether this is in sync with what you as an individual are or what your true capabilities are, is more a function of your ME brand speak, that any other factor.

Its’ worth so much to gather your thoughts together to create your own ‘ME brand speak now’. It’s also a wonderful exercise to introspect all your facets of life, and create an appropriate ME brand-speak, that reflects you in the right perspective to all those in the marketplace.

So, what’s your ME brand-speak? Are you packaging you as much what your true capabilities and qualities are? Do it now, for a better & greater LIFE…..

Over the years you have managed to move up the food chain. You started changing your focus from being the most competent, professionally speaking, to other stuff that helped you climb the rungs of the organizational structure. The per capita frequent flyer miles of the continent have gone up because of you. You are mastering the golf stroke. You are no longer the innocent wide-eyed teddy bear. You are the political animal a lion tamer would dread. The corner office is in sight. You point to your beer belly that is now competing with Homer Simpson’s and laugh it off as a sign of prosperity (it still makes you a slob). Building those muscles. Learning is not on your agenda. When your coach tells you that your IQ and EQ points have not improved for eons, you are annoyed. That is so not true, you say. “I am the one who speaks at every seminar on the critical importance of building a learning organization (cool phrase, what!) and my favorite story to motivate the troops is on taking risks. You know, the lightbulb fellow, Edison did not get the filament right the first time either.” You will point out, as evidence, to those motivational quotes that are framed and put on your wall about why we should all aspire to be lifelong learners.

You show everyone the dozens of group photos of you and bunch of fat-cats from your weeklong training sessions on Leadership Development at the ski-resort and the 5 day seminar on “Life’s Lessons that Golf Taught Me”. Or that Team Building do at the place tucked away in the mountains which is famous for the sea-food grill … By the way, have you noticed in all the fat-cat photos, that it is the same bunch of guys who seem to be landing up for these paid holidays and generally speaking the same fat cats speak at EVERY seminar with the Powerpoint slides they made ten years back? Ever wondered why their ‘menu and venue driven’ training should be funded by the employer? Why??

Not saying for a minute that ALL training is only menu and venue driven. Not at all. That would be painting everyone with a broad brush. How do we differentiate the good guys from those with the horns and tail? If only individuals had to fund their own learning and development agenda with their own vacation days and their money instead of being paid for by the employer, there would be a sea change in the way people would view their own learning options. Instead of taking the ‘menu and venue’ based courses, you would choose what you truly need to be ahead of the pack. You, like all employees, would take those certifications to refresh your knowledge and those that you need to build your soft skills, to learn how to run a virtual team, to know what is the next big thing lurking around the corner waiting to snap at your ankles and render you obsolete. That is the only way to separate the wheat from the chaff or the lean from the mean. Have everyone fund their own effort at keeping their skills upgraded.

So what is the role of the employer in getting the new upgraded version 2.0 of me? Here is the deal. If the new improved me, results in my manager noticing the large shovels of contribution I have been heaping on to the company’s bottomline since, they will need to pick up the cost of that skill upgradation plus add some more to fund all the coffee I had while I was slaving away, credit back the vacation days (and maybe throw in a few extra), it would be a win-win. The employer would be only paying for what is visibly and in a measurable (not miserable) way adding to the bottomline. The employee would really think very hard about the courses that will add value professionally and then be at pains to show how it is showing up in the new improved behavior at work. No more menu and venue based training. Let that place famous for the sea-food grill appeal to the tourist and not masquerade as a training destination.

So, how does the management deal with a lateral hire? Can he or she be given the same treatment that is given to their colleagues? How do the team members respond to a lateral hire? What type of assignments and responsibilities can a lateral hire handle? These are a few questions that will invariably pop up when an experienced fresher enters an organization.

Subroto Bagchi, co-founder of Mindtree, in his book “High Performance Entrepreneur” suggests that lateral hires (LH) be handled by an experienced mentor in the organization. The mentor need not be the immediate supervisor of the LH. However, the mentor needs to have the experience, maturity, sense of humor, and compassion to make the LH feel at home.

The sensitivity factor here is the other team members should not start feeling that the LH is given preferential treatment or importance. So, a fine balance needs to be maintained.

In one of the companies I worked, a new employee has to send an e-mail to all employees of the company (including the CEO) describing his or her education, areas of expertise, strengths, weaknesses, and a bit about their personal interests and lifestyle. This introductory mail helps everyone to understand the newbie. And also evaluate themselves as compared to a new or LH.

I feel this type of an introduction is important because most of the time your own colleagues, whom you have lunch with, have no clue of your areas of expertise. A healthy induction and introduction will help the other team members understand why critical assignments and new business initiatives are being directed to the LH.

Job markets these days are very fluid. Stereotypes have been diluted and hence we have an influx of housewives, rural wannabes, freelancers, and crossover specialists entering the corporate arena.

So it is a challenge for the human resource executive and/or the management to acknowledge the diverse workgroup and devise appropriate strategies to make everyone feel at ease and work together in peace.

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Anitha is an engineer with a masters in human resource management. She has conducted and been a part of syncronous and asynchronous training in technical and soft skills subjects. Her interests include reading, cooking, singing, and listening to music. You can reach her at anithajebaraj@gmail.com. Visit her blog at www.anithawrites.blogspot.com.