This is perhaps the biggest difference between real life and school. But by the time we finish school we are so conditioned that we are unable to bridge the gap. We unconsciously try and avoid situations which could result in failure. We therefore live our life like the straight line stock!!

Failure and creativity

Fear of failure hampers creativity. It’s not unusual for an individual to present a new idea, see it fail, then never again try something new. Fear of adverse criticism narrows creative potential.

On the other hand, a truly creative person thoroughly examines the failure to identify what went wrong and why. He turns failure into a learning experience.

Every bit of solid theory and evidence demonstrates that it is impossible to generate a few good ideas without also generating a lot of bad ideas.

The greatest failure of all, of course, is not to attempt a new idea.

Failure is not the opposite of success

Are success and failure opposites of each other? The answer is NO. The energy that creates great ideas also creates errors. Not achieving success is usually termed as failure. And ‘failure’ is so looked down upon that we sometimes avoid taking a shot at success. We forget that success and failure are actually neighbours or pals and success may only be an inch away from failure! Looking at failure as an antithesis of success is to lose our creative powers. In any case, if we are successful every time, it means our goal is not big enough!

If you aren’t allowed to fail, then you won‚Äôt risk anything. Then every idea has to be a “safe” idea, and you are no longer creating. You are simply doing it the way it has always been done.

A useful phrase to keep in mind is ‘THERE IS NO FAILURE, ONLY FEEDBACK’. This is a great thought that works especially well when we are trying out new things and thinking of new solutions.

We need not fear failure but we should try and learn how to fail intelligently!! When we try and not succeed, it is a good failure. The only ‘bad failure’ is not trying and not learning from mistakes.

More than twenty years ago when the washing machine market in India was brimming for the first time with a slew of brands and competition was really hot, one company stood out for its outstanding performance. In this company, the CEO was stupefied at the phenomenal performance of one of his zonal managers who went on to receive a massive hike in emoluments and a promotion to the very top of the marketing department.

It so happened that the CEO happened to read an article in a management journal to the effect that success ought to be analysed at least as seriously as failure and one should always be healthily skeptical–use the power of NO.

He appointed a creativity consultant to look into the reasons for the phenomenal performance of the ‘star’ zonal manger. Unknown to this manager the consultant travelled deep into the territory meeting dealers and end users and thereafter submitted what turned out to be a shocking verdict that lead to the resignation of the ‘star’ manager. It turned out that the end users were using the washing machine to churn lassi! The company quickly realised that this was a health hazard and that the manager was in fact aware of this perverted use of the product.

An oft repeated fault in many organisations, is to automatically attribute success to the brilliance of the manager concerned or the team. Failure conversely is attributed rather automatically to incompetence. This is a serious flaw. In the above instance the CEO could have requested the ‘star’ performer to make a presentation to all the sales staff and share his insights into the strategy and tactics that in fact led to his grand ‘success’. In all cases of good performance it is essential to analyse the success factors with a view not to investigate into a possible fraud as in the lassi case, but in fact to see if the strategy could be replicated across the organization and also to determine if it was sustainable. In the performance assessment systems of most organisations the focus tends to be on successful outcomes of an executive’s efforts. This emphasis is being carried too far in most companies. The result of this overemphasis on outcomes is that little if any attention is paid to the process by which success was achieved.

Consequently good performance based on fortuitous circumstances gets rewarded while a dynamic executive whose performance may not be up to the mark for reasons beyond his control may go unnoticed or even punished. The role of chance factors in successful decision making or business strategy cannot be overlooked.

The decision making process has not received the attention it deserves. In nationalized banks for example it is common for executives to be denied promotion or to be suspended for what the management considers lapses in decision making leading to bad loans. It may benefit these banks to make a study of the correlation between the quality of loans on one side and quality of the decision making process on the other.

Too often for want of adequate awareness of and stress on the process factor, organisations may end up rewarding luck and punishing competence.

In the early stages of the decision process we tend to make a fundamental error, that of not challenging the data available to us. We tend to look at the data and form a viewpoint and then not seek further data. Even in gathering data we tend to look for that which confirms our pre-existing views. We fall into the trap of assuming a certain stance and then seeking evidence that substantiates our stand. This ‘confirmation bias’ is possibly why some of the best thought out and researched decisions often go wrong.

People who say that ‘seeing is believing’ are usually better at believing rather than seeing, said George Santayana. What he referred to is the phenomenon whereby we actually and unconsciously seek evidence that strengthens our pre-existing beliefs. This bias is perhaps one of the most debilitating aspects of human thinking. Allied with this is the mental filtering that we all do whereby we let into our mind information in a selective fashion. This filtering usually lets in only confirmatory information into our thinking process while conveniently keeping out disconfirming evidence.

I had a personal experience recently when a young college student from a South Mumbai college asked my opinion on the quality of college education in Mumbai relative to the rest of the country. I told her that Chennai had some of the best colleges offering quality education, at which point she reacted almost violently. Obviously I had touched a raw nerve. She was not comfortable with evidence that challenged her pre-existing beliefs. She challenged the basis of my conclusion and when I told her that I relied on surveys done by two major national weeklies she retorted ‘Both these magazines have no credibility in Mumbai anyway.’ Of course I assuaged her feelings by honestly stating my reservations about the scientific validity if such surveys. I was aware of the power of NO, the power of healthy scepticism.

While this was a relatively harmless instance, the consequences could be disastrous in the corporate context when decisions are taken with the confirmation bias. It is therefore necessary to be conscious of the working of such a bias and deliberately seek out disconfirming evidence. Some very successful top executives make a fetish, and rightly so, of deliberately encouraging executives who ‘dare’ to differ from them. Thus Sam Goldwyn used to tell his colleagues ‘I do not want yes men in this organization. I want people to speak their minds even if it costs them their job’. What he meant was that he insisted on disconfirming evidence.

Another top executive used to say at the end of a meeting that since all participants were in full agreement with his views he considered the meeting a waste of time and would summon another one on the same subject when some of his colleagues would prove him wrong!

I once advised a top executive friend of mine to recruit those who aggressively differed from him in the interview and challenged his viewpoint. He tried this tactic with trepidation. He now tells me that these dissenting recruits proved to be the most innovative ones he had ever employed. They had helped him avoid falling into the trap of the confirmation bias. Indeed the power of NO is immense. Parallel thinking, pioneered by Dr.Edward de Bono, is one technique that can help keep out the confirmation bias, and summon the power of NO, more so in a group decision making context.

All of us want to forge ahead and excel in our respective fields. There are different approaches adopted by various persons for achieving their goals. Goals, of course, keep changing from time to time.

The goal of the parents is to bring up their children and ensure that they have good education and rewarding careers later in their lives. A child’s goal is first to be able to sit, then stand up and then walk. Once in school, her goal is to study and come up to the expectations of her teachers and parents. After education, the goal is to find a good job and then to go higher up the ladder of success.

It is a different story that most people do not have any specific goals and just meander through their lives purposelessly. Not having any goal is like starting a car without knowing where you are headed. Most people know where they want to go and what route they need to take when they get into the car. When they are not sure of the route, they ask for directions from others.

Life is like driving a vehicle where you need to have a specific destination. Otherwise you will land nowhere or you will land at a place where you don’t want to be. When that happens, it is no use blaming your luck, fate or circumstances. In another context, Shakespeare says, “The fault does not lie in our stars but in ourselves.” Not being where you want to be is frustrating. The disappointment continues for such people because even after being where they do not want to be they do not take any steps to correct the situation.

Surprisingly, only 3 to 7% people set their goals. As children, people want to be pilots, doctors, movie stars or civil servants. But they lose their enthusiasm when they grow up because they no longer think that any such thing is possible. This is because they did not set goals or worked to achieve them.
Now, how often you think of what you want in life. After achieving it, do you ask, “What next?” Without goals, there is no excitement because you don’t feel yourself challenged. Without goals, life becomes boring, uninteresting, depressing and monotonous.

When you have goals to achieve, you feel that your life has a purpose. It is not to say that everyone should have lofty goals. It is only saying that if you have some goals, you will get more out of life and stretch your potential to the maximum.

You must set realistic goals. Begin with the goals which you can achieve. If you keep on failing, you will feel disheartened and lose further interest and confidence. So the best thing is to set small, realistic goals to begin with and then switch to higher goals as you go along. If you are unemployed and want to be a millionaire, start looking for a job, give it your best and start saving money to begin with. Simply wishing that you want to be a millionaire, is not good enough.

Another important factor essential for achieving a goal is a fervent and fanatical belief that you can and you will realise your goals. This involves changing your thinking and developing an unshakeable confidence in your ability to do so. You cannot disbelieve in yourself and hope at the same time to get good results. You have to move from the mindset of ‘I can’t’ to ‘I can’ and ‘I will’.

You have to be very clear about your goals as clarity of objectives ensures success and happiness. Lack of clarity brings disappointments, dissatisfaction, failure or underachievement more often than any other single attribute. Your success in life is directly proportionate to how clear you are about what you really and truly want.

The best thing will be to write down goals as writing clarifies our thinking. Keep the written record of your goals at a place where it can serve as a constant reminder. The discipline of writing down something is the first step toward making it happen. Writing not only clarifies your thinking but also reinforces your thoughts. The clearer you are about what you want, the more likely it will be that you will do more of the things that are consistent and helpful in achieving them. Only a clear mental picture can transform itself into reality. While setting your goals, chart out the path you will follow for attaining them. List all the steps you need to take to make your goals a reality.

You should also list your personal strengths required for achieving your goals and seek help of experts if you need it. Above all, you must be passionate, excited and enthusiastic about your goals.

Form a habit of revisiting, evaluating and, if necessary, adjusting your strategies to achieve your goals. Until you are committed, there will be hesitation and a chance to pull back. A definite commitment means burning your bridges so that you can only move forward. This will release unexpected energy and initiative, leading to the transformation of your goals into a reality. Boldness has a genius and a magical power in it. It is up to each one of us to exploit it.

Whatever needs to be done, just begin it. Be on the look out for new opportunities and options which can take you towards your goals. Always try to be cheerful and optimistic. Keep on asking yourself as to what you can do even in a small measure today which will take you nearer your goal. Ask yourself whether your goals are specific, smart, measurable and achievable. If they are not, then take steps to make them so.
If you are unable to make any headway towards your goals within the framework set by you, then examine the factors that are holding you back or coming in the way. Obviously, something is wrong and you must make mid-way corrections as required. You have to take risks and, if necessary, change tracks for attaining your goals and objectives.

I personally use all the systems available to me to evaluate my daily progress. These systems include the computer, digital diaries, the clock and my own stop watch. The best thing is to scribble down whatever I have to do and then review it at the end of the day to see how much I have accomplished and how much is left undone. I make sure that I spend all my productive time on things which matter most to me.

I have realised that you do not get credit of any sort for socialising or chit-chatting but for focussing and spending your time on things vital to you. There are no short cuts or magic wands to achieve goals except hard work and hard work coupled with focus.

Lastly, you can achieve any goal you want in life. The only condition is to work just half a day. It does not matter whether it is the first or the last 12 hour!

Joginder Singh is former director of CBI, India. He has written several books on personal development.

Have you ever walk into a business establishment where the host, salesperson or customer service provider makes you feel so special that you love going back, even though you could have gotten a better deal elsewhere? The difference is more than the product, services, quality, price, terms, availability or delivery dates. It is the charisma, personality, manner, charm & presentation of these people.

The chemistry & actions of people can either repel or attract you to do business with them. All of us have to do some form of selling in every area of our life, whether we are aware of it or not. The principle of charisma, charm & a positive personality is contagious, & it attracts people to you like a magnet at work & at home.

Self- confidence
When you feel self-confident, you naturally carry with you a level of charisma & charm to the forefront. To get self-confidence going for you every morning, start with dressing for the part you want. If you are leaving for work, dressing up professionally not only makes you look good & feel great, you are more apt to conduct & present yourself in a professional manner. Chances are when you feel good about yourself; you will do your best & hence be more confident.

Focus
Maintain your focus & refuse to allow yourself to be distracted by issues other than the task at hand. This is crucial especially when you want to actively listen to your partner, your prospects’ challenges, needs & objectives. For instance, when speaking to your clients over the telephone, do not read your emails at the same time. Active listening requires your full & uninterrupted attention. Remember you are not in a meeting to give a sales pitch, but to help your customers solve their problems or achieve their objective, & you cannot do so until you know what it is. So give them your undivided attention.

Interest & Attitude
So what makes people attracted to you? Psychologists have researched & explore many factors for years, including physical qualities, cooperativeness, intelligence & many others. One strong finding is that people are attracted to you when you share the same attitude about life, such as parenting, work ethics, values & philosophy, relationships, welfare, legislation, even movies, smoking & drinking. It affirms a person’s ability to be sensible, to interpret the world correctly, and to make good predictions about the future. Another reason is people naturally assume that those who share similar interest and attitude will like them, which in turn make them like you. So if you want to be favorably received, see if you can look deeper & find where you agree rather than disagree. Everyone prefers to hear that ‘you are right’ rather than ‘you are wrong’.

Sex appeal
Another interesting fundamental is sex appeal which adds flair to your personality. Even if you are a warm, interesting & approachable person, your interactions with others can be flat if you don’t show at least a little sex appeal. Sex appeal goes beyond sexuality. It’s different from the sheer physical attributes of showing skin or flaunting your body. It is a sign of openness to engage others by becoming interested in what they do & how they think & feel. It is a healthy & natural part of yourself that you display, in all settings; whether it’s business, social or romantic. The process is the way you show your appeal, through your appreciation & attraction to others with your sense of physical confidence.
Even supermodels can lack appeal if they lack interest in others & are unresponsive.

Responding to others
“People do not want to be sold a product or service. They want to deal with people who they think have their interest or who care about them.
- J. Oliver Crom, CEO, Dale Carnegie

Showing people, however subtly that you find them unique & interesting makes them feel good about themselves, and thus they feel good about you. Giving them your full attention is a good way of building rapport & creating a momentary exclusive world of ‘you & me’. Some easy ways to show attraction is through eye contact, a warm handshake and displaying special interest & appreciation in others.

Reaching out
Another way of showing attraction or interest is with touch. Subtle touches are good if you are careful & sensitive about the norms as to what is appropriate and comfortable to most people. People generally like to be touched likely even in nonromantic settings. A gentle, light & sincere touch somewhere between the shoulder and hand such as the elbow area can have a powerful positive impact on your feeling about that person even when he or she is a stranger. When meeting someone the first time, you can touch others casually as a gesture to get their attention, or to direct their attention somewhere else. The message usually is: I like you & I am a warm person. However, we need to exercise caution that going overboard may make others feel uncomfortable resulting in an adverse effect.

Be comfortable in your own skin
Your self-image & how you feel about yourself shows in how you carry yourself, your posture and your gait. The way you exhibit your body emotion is contagious much like a smile or a yawn. You can hear your own voice but you can’t see your own mannerisms and body the way others can. Hence you need to be conscious of your physical presence and the way you hold yourself. Even though you may not have control over your physical attributes, your physical presentation, your body movement & body language are noticed by other people which you may not be aware. Avoid displaced energy such as fidgeting and nervous movements. Being comfortable with who you are with confidence is how you want to be perceived. When you embrace your body & dress appropriately for the occasion, you will feel attractive and tend to present yourself positively. In turn others will feel good in your presence & thus find you more attractive.

Article contributed by Betty Kan, a Singapore based trainer and personal branding consultant.

Look up any dictionary. You will find several definitions of failure there. These are:

• A failing to do or perform
• A state of inability to perform a normal action adequately
• A fracturing or giving way under stress
• A lack of success

Please examine all these definitions carefully. What do you find common in all these definitions? These clearly state that when it comes to achieving a goal, failure is nothing but a perception.

If you believe that you have failed, then you have. If you believe that you can’t succeed, you can’t. If you believe that you can’t possibly handle the pressure of achieving your goals, you can’t. If you believe that you are not successful, you aren’t. Failure has no existence beyond your mind. The moment you decide to stop working towards your goals, failure is born.

What would happen if you do not believe in any of that? What would happen if you carry on working towards your goals? What if you take one step at a time for as long as it takes? What happens to failure then? It no longer exists, does it? So there you are. Now do you agree with me?

If you have been working diligently, but not yet seeing any results; keep this simple statement in mind: ‘Failure has no existence”. Just keep going and you can never fail; because there is no such thing as failure for you.

Never count yourself out. Many a times, people give up without ever realizing it. Don’t stop when the going gets tough. Don’t let your motivation dwindle. Make a commitment to yourself, to make your goals happen. Never ever quit. Do not ever contemplate failure. Do not lose your inner determination.
Thomas Alva Edison’s words ring so true to this day, “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” And he should know what he was talking about!
Let me share Edison’s life history with you. He had only three months of formal schooling, and he was partially deaf.  He ‘failed’ approximately ten thousand times while working on the light bulb. At the age of 67, his factory caught fire. While watching the smoke Edison remarked, “God has erased all my mistakes”. Three weeks later he invented phonograph. In fact, he was the greatest inventor of all times. He knew that failure has no existence. Follow Edison’s example and get going.

Set a general timeline for achieving your goals but do not get hooked on to a specific timeframe. Some circumstances always remain beyond your control; hence you can’t always be sure ‘when’ your goal will be achieved. If you get attached to a particular timeframe, you are setting yourself up for failure. It is better to get a general idea about by when you would like to see your goal accomplished. Take it one day at a time. Focus on making progress everyday. You will eventually reach the finish line. Don’t think of taking shortcuts; they don’t work.

Don’t ever view obstacles and setbacks as failures, because they are not. In fact, they have nothing in common with failure. The two are as different as chalk is from cheese. Whenever you face an obstacle, setback, or delay, it can mean only one thing; the time has not yet come for your goal to be completed. That is all! It does not mean that you have failed. It does not mean that you are weak. It does not also mean that you will never achieve your goals. It just means that you are not through as yet. You have got to keep moving ahead, finding a way around an obstacle.

Doing an honest, personal SWOT analysis helps in maintaining the morale during tough times; especially if you link it to a strong and powerful goal! It is easy to conduct your own SWOT analysis. Take a sheet of paper and divide it into four quadrants. Label each area as S, W, O, T. Look at each area and write down the answers to following questions:

Strengths:

• What skills and capabilities do you possess?
• Which areas do you excel in?
• What qualifications, accreditations, or experience make you unique?
• What do other people consider as your strengths?
• Which personal qualities, values and beliefs help you stand out amongst others?

Weaknesses:

• What are the gaps in your capabilities?
• What skills do you need to develop?
• Which areas of your life can you improve upon?
• What do other people see as your weaknesses?
• Which personal difficulties do you need to work through to reach your goals?
• What opportunities are currently available to you?
• What external circumstances can help you achieve your goals?
• Which people could offer you support in achieving your goals?

Threats:

• What obstacles are you currently facing?
• What external circumstances can hinder your growth?
• Which people could get into the way of your achieving your goals?

Such an analysis will clearly help you to understand that you possibly cannot fail, unless you decide to fail. This analysis will help you highlight the aspects of your growth story that you may not have ever considered. This will provide you with a different perspective on your personality.

So, go ahead, review your strengths, and consider ways to address your weaknesses. Develop your skills and capabilities. Review your opportunities and use them to your advantage. Think of ways to minimize or eliminate your threats. Such actions are a one way ticket to success. Failure has no role to play here, as it just does not exist. All that exists and always did are opportunities and challenges!

Let go of your false beliefs and expect success!

One such input is the Three Bucket Theory and I think this is relevant to a lot of others out there in the world and so would like to share this with everyone. Here goes!

A typical career spans three decades plus starting from the 20’s and going on till the 50’s. These thirty odd years should be split up into three buckets or segments of ten years each.

In the First Bucket, one needs to focus on learning. This learning should be all encompassing and not self limiting in any manner. One should have an open mind and learn about the working styles, organization styles, people, communication, teams, practical tips, etc. In short anything new and unknown needs to be explored and learnt in depth. Herein lies an inherent trap. Most youngsters who start their career are educated and have spent a past decade and a half learning or rather studying. Often, they mistake this studying to be a substitute for learning and more dangerously act as if there is very little if at all anything left to learn.

I quote an old Tamil adage: “What one learns is usually a fistful, whereas what is left to be learnt is an entire universe”. Anyone operating with this thought during the first bucket would stand to benefit immensely in the other buckets. A word of caution though — remember learning never stops throughout life. However, during the First Bucket the focus should be consciously on learning and not on designations, compensations, matching up to peers, besting colleagues, etc.

During the Second Bucket one has the opportunity to become an expert. If there has been extensive learning in the First Bucket one would be clear about all strengths and weaknesses and also is in a position to judge which of the learning can be leveraged best for personal success.

Becoming an expert requires one to have extensive and intensive experience in the field of choice, spanning first hand front line experience to overall strategic exposure. This gives one a true perspective and makes one an expert and also nurtures a deep rooted maturity with regards to all expertise.

Again during the Second Bucket the focus should be on exploring opportunities which allow in-depth exposure to fine tune expertise and one should not necessarily be driven by monetary or other considerations.

If these two phases are managed well and one develops true deep rooted expertise, the Third Bucket is the easiest part of a successful career. In this Bucket, one needs to work towards personal branding by sharing acquired expertise in public forums and through professional networks. When this is done properly all kinds of success including material prosperity follows even if one does not wish for the same.

Given the increasing life expectancy nowadays, I have added a Fourth Bucket to this theory. During the fourth phase one should consciously work towards giving back to the society. It could be by sharing one’s expertise and experience for public good through NGOs or with promising youngsters to create a better future.

My personal view is that there is no success formula and as such this should not be taken as gospel truth. This is a direction. Take it, craft it, mould it to suit your personality and hopefully you would create your own version of the Three Bucket Theory as pass it on to others.

Productivity is required at all levels and times. I have a few questions, though. Does everybody know what ‘productivity’ means? Does everybody know that the process of maximizing effort in minimum time is called productivity? Do you have to be a management pro, expert in the technical jargon to be productive? I have no clue what ‘chores automation’ means, or what ‘overcoming procrastination’ might possibly refer to (hats off to the ones who do know, though).

To be truthful, nothing struck a chord in my mind when I read about the productivity theme. Does that mean that I don’t know much about productivity? Quite obviously. But does that mean that I am not productive? I don’t think so. Anybody who knows how to maximize time use is productive. But a few tips by the great management gurus are always appreciated.

Time management comes first and foremost. The question is…. can we really manage time? No, we cannot. We can only tune ourselves according to the day (and night). No one can manage time — we only get twenty four hours in a day — not a second more, not a second less. ‘Time management’ does sound impressive and makes us feel important, as if we are managing nature when actually we are making the adjustments to nature.

About email management, I suggest directly delete spam without attempting to fish for some accidentally-sent-to-spam-folder-useful-mail. Trust me, there’s no such thing. Other than that, it’s work-related mail and personal messages, in order of priority, depending on time available (forwards and advertisements ignored). Killing off email is not feasible but on busy days it would be nice to send it on vacation.

With respect to ‘chores automation’, how far can we take it? Program Power Point so that feeding in topics is all you have to do to prepare slides, and maybe even have a voice over program for presenting them? If so, I think Microsoft and the World Wide Web would be entitled to salary checks for every project we complete. Nah, automating chores is to aid and facilitate work; the brain behind the work will always be, well, a brain — a real live human one right there on the spot.

Goal management is another important factor — the most important one, next to time management perhaps. Clearly defined goals that are realistic and broken down into smaller steps are instrumental in achieving high productivity. Compiling a “To Do” list comes in useful here as we all have lapses in memory. Along with productivity tools, they bring a lot of clarity and simplicity. Just spend a few minutes make a “To Do” list, and it helps you to focus throughout the day.

Getting rid of distractions is one thing I find to be most challenging. However, I do believe that to minimize distractions the first step is to identify them. There is a fine line between distraction and recreation and you must identify it. Dear old Facebook for example, is a recreation that can become a distraction if I am not careful.

Overcoming procrastination is another difficult task, be it official work like finishing assignments before the deadline or something as basic as waking up in time for an early lecture. Perspective helps a lot, though. Delaying a job results in a pile up of work (as if you didn’t know that), so merely thinking about the prospective stack or panic as the deadline approaches helps to overcome lethargy and laziness.

Cutting down on sweet sleep is perhaps the hardest of all and totally unnecessary. Cutting down on oversleeping certainly is what is really important. Everyone needs a healthy dose of sleep synchronized with a sensible work rhythm (I think working at night is the best!). You wouldn’t want to work for twenty two hours one day, then feel sleepy and strained for twenty hours the next day, and end up sleeping for forty eight hours straight, would you?

The level of productivity on a collective level also has a psychological aspect. Work morale, work environment, encouragement and incentives are factors which make people want to work. So along with the methods and numerous suggestions here, my conclusion comes down to this: Productivity cannot just be achieved by a list of tips to be followed; it has to come from self-motivation or personal willingness!

From the beginning of time, as the world and life itself evolved, mankind has constantly striven to push the pace of progress, leaving the weak to die, and the strong to live and thrive. We called it the process of ‘natural selection’. And so it is today too, with even greater ferocity and ruthlessness.

Anybody within reach of reality, must always recognize the compelling need – of discomfort, of constant change, of threat to survival, of creating and fostering change, of continually learning, of challenging the established norm.

Only when you can catalyze change continuously, can you truly consider yourself to be leading on the edge.

The arithmetic is very simple. The size of the pie being constant, to eat more of it, somebody else has to go hungry. That is, unless somebody has the wisdom and the ability to make another pie and another. Business and Life strategies are increasingly pointed in this direction. How to make another pie!

Here is a Do It Yourself Kit that each individual would find useful in the marathon race for survival and growth especially in these times of uncertainty.

1. Believe in Yourself – You Count!
1.1 List your Strengths.
1.2 List successful Moments of Truth in your life.
1.3 List Positive Feedback you have received.
1.4 Write an Appreciative Letter to yourself.
1.5 Write One Thing you do well that others don’t or cannot do.
2. Put Your Entire Energy into What You Do- It’s Your Signature!
2.1 Make every moment special.
2.2 Check what you have done for excellence.
2.3 Set standards for yourself.
2.4 Sell your work to yourself.
2.5 Make a Masterpiece of any work you do.
3. Value and Respect Others, No Matter Who They Are or What They Do – You Can Learn From Anyone!
3.1 List Your Everyday Advisors and their Key Advice.
3.2 Write a positive note on How to Use each Key Advice.
3.3 Make it important to Try each Key Advice and Record the Result.
3.4 Write down Who You Discount or Discredit as Capable of Sound Advice and Why.
3.5 Write down at least 2 Good Points about those you have put in the “Discredit List”.
4. Experiment and Experience Life – Move Out of Your Shell!
4.1 Describe a Typical Day in your Life.
4.2 Write what New Things you have done each day for the past Ten days.
4.3 Write down Things that you want to do in Life but do not dare to.
4.4 Write down Positive Outcomes and Negative outcomes for each.
4.5 Write down How you will Handle each Negative Outcome successfully.

5. Learn to Forgive Yourself and Others – But Do Not Encourage Incompetence!
5.1 Make a list of all the mistakes you can recall you have made in the past one year.
5.2 Put down reasons for each mistake and classify them into 3 categories – PERSONAL ( identify whether Lack of Knowledge or Lack of Personal Competence / Skill / Ability ), CIRCUMSTANTIAL ( Due to Situations out of Your Control ), or PROVOKED ( because of Other People’s interference/ incorrect advice / involvement).
5.3 Write down consequences of each mistake.
5.4 Decide how you will handle each consequence to produce a Positive Outcome.
5.5 Examine each PERSONAL error and write down what you have to do to strengthen yourself in the areas of Knowledge, Skills and Capabilities to improve your overall Competence.
6. Keep an Open Mind, Learn to Coexist with Differences – In People and their Opinions and Views.
6.1 Make a list of people you do not like – people known to you personally or professionally.
6.2 Write what you find wrong with each one of them.
6.3 Put down honestly, at least one clear bias or prejudice you hold against each one.
6.4 Examine the link between your bias or prejudice and your judgment about these people.
6.5 Write down honestly any small agreement you may have with each view or opinion you have rejected or discarded.
7. Take Charge of Your Life – Be Alert at the Wheel, Learn to Accelerate, Chart Your Course, Follow the Signs, Decide Your Breaks, Fill Your Tank and Turn On the Music too!
7.1 Write down One Dozen things you are trying to accomplish at the moment.
7.2 Write down your progress against each one – use a scale of 0 to 10 where 10 is the maximum accomplishment score.
7.3 Put down what is blocking you against each of these one dozen items.
7.4 As a consultant, recommend to yourself, what you should do to overcome these obstacles.
7.5 Write down how you will celebrate each success in overturning each obstacle, and make sure you do it.

8. Make Sure You Have Passengers in Your Car too – Carry Others along with you, Create Wealth for Others too!
8.1 Make a list of the closest people you live with and those you work with.
8.2 Write down for each one what you think are their needs and concerns.
8.3 Write down what you do well and what capabilities you possess to do those things well.
8.4 Put down against each thing you do well, how you can help each one of the people you have listed earlier.
8.5 Make a silent promise to each one you have listed that you will help them in someway, no matter how small.
9. Be Humble Not Arrogant, but Market Yourself Vigourously and Honestly!
9.1 Write down a complete list of all your possible strengths and capabilities.
9.2 Create affinity clusters of these and write down the results they can help produce or deliver, regardless whether you currently have the opportunity or not.
9.3 Write down who needs to know about each of these strengths and capabilities.
9.4 Make an appointment with at least 3 key people from your list.
9.5 Discuss your strengths and capabilities with these 3 key people and ask them how and when they can use your talents.

10. Keep revisiting Your Goals ( roadmap ) and Keep a Clear Eye on the Road too – Stay Focused on the Present while Working out the Future!
10.1 Write a list of everything you could possibly want in life.
10.2 Qualify each one as Short Term, Medium Term and Long Term, using your own definition of the time frame for each.
10.3 Put deadlines for all Short Term goals and list at least 10 immediate activities or tasks you need to perform to achieve them.
10.4 Draw flexible time-lines for each Medium Term and Long Term goal and list at least 10 short term activities / tasks you must perform to achieve each one.
10.5 Raise red flag check points on all time framed activities and tasks.

When I say “article” many of my clients freak out.  Here’s what I mean – 500-800 words (that’s a page to a page and a half) on a topic related to your products or services.  Once you do a few, you can crank one out in an hour or less.  Here are four tips to help you become a successful article marketer.

Tip #1: How to get started.  The most difficult thing for most newbies to article writing is sitting their butt in the chair and writing.  The dreaded blank page in front of them.  The fear that they aren’t smart enough.  Any of these limiting ideas floating around in your head?  Want to know my best tip on how to get past them?  Set a deadline and tell someone else about it.  I know that Pat is waiting to receive this ezine every Monday-she then gets it out to each of you every Wednesday. I’m not going to let her (or you) down!

Tip #2: Don’t worry about how great your writing skills might be!  My training in academic writing was an obstacle to overcome when it came to article writing – not a benefit!  I had to toss out the dry, impersonal style that had been drilled into me through writing many academic papers.  The tip is to write the way you speak – like you’re having a conversation with your reader.

Tip #3: How to structure your articles to make writing simple.  Remember, it shouldn’t take more than an hour to an hour and a half tops to get your article written. It’s a good idea to let it sit for a day and then reread it – you’ll be looking at it with fresh eyes.  Here are some of my favorite types of articles:

a.  Lists.  Everyone loves lists.  Think of David Letterman’s top 10.  How about these: Top 10 Misconceptions About Cancer.  Top 10 Books that Changed the World.  Top 10 Tips for Getting a Job in a Challenging Job Market.  My very first non-academic article was Top 10 Ways to Live Authentically. Go ahead and google it –you’ll find it all over the web!

I wrote out ten tips without thinking too hard about it.  Then I added two to three sentences to elaborate a bit on each tip.  This was the first article I submitted online.  I then offered it as a free giveaway on my website.  A few months later, I expanded each of the ten tips into about ½ page each.  I called it an e-course.  That became my free giveaway.  Each person signing up to receive this gift, received one tip in their email box each week for ten weeks.  Next, I could expand each tip into 10 -15 pages each and have a book! You don’t have to have 10 tips – I’ve been doing a lot of 3-4 tips – I just write and see how many I end up with!

Another angle is to share top “mistakes” – Top Five Job Interview Mistakes or Top 7 Mistakes Women Business Owners Make – these get your attention because YOU don’t want to make those same mistakes.

b.  How to. How to articles with bullet points are also well liked.  This article is an example of how to write an article.  The ideas are endless:  How to Make Your Lipstick Last Longer; How to Take the Best Pet Photos; How to Clean Your Home in 19 Minutes etc ….go ahead, think of a title for your next how to article!

c.  Review articles. You can review books, products, movies, anything you’re interested in that ties into your products or services.  Tell about the promise they made and whether it lived up to that promise.  You can talk about value or the experience you had.  You can compare products and make recommendations.

Tip #4: What do I do with it now? Ok –so you’ve decided to get your butt in the chair and write your first article.  What do you do with it after you’ve written it?  Submit it to your database. I recommend using aweber.com. Submit it online – http://www.ezinearticles.com and http://hubpages.com are good places to start.  Think about any local newspapers or newsletters whose readers might benefit from your article and submit it to them.  Use it as a handout when you do speaking engagements (in return for the participant’s email address).  Take a piece of what you’ve written and talk about it on your blog.  Record several articles onto a cd as a free giveaway…you see, all this marketing leverage from an hour of your time.

I’d love for you to drop a line and tell me you’ve written your first article!

About the Author:

Ann Ronan, Ph.D. is an author, speaker, certified career coach and self employment expert, and vision generator.

Ann delivers smart, simple ways for people to acknowledge what they love to do and do more of it.  Her articles, products, and books have motivated and inspired readers in numerous print and online publications.  She regularly leads coaching programs, tele-seminars and live retreats, bringing the message to audiences internationally that living a passion-based life will bring prosperity and success.

She was recently selected from a nationwide search to be featured in Discover Your Inner Strength. The book features best-selling authors Stephen R. Covey (Seven Habits of Highly Effective People), Brian Tracy (Million Dollar Habits), and Ken Blanchard (One Minute Manager).

It is vital to get things done, but it is equally crucial and imperative to leave a few non essential things, left undone. No constitution of the world gives anybody the right to throw in the towel and concede defeat. You should adopt an approach, to keep on trying till your endeavour is successful. If you want to be lucky in your job or profession, work harder at it. You will find that you luck is proportionate to the labour, you put in. Life is like a computer, where the output is dependent on your input. Grind and labour is the price of realising any goal. You can accomplish anything, if you are willing to pay the price and are fanatic about your success. You have a choice to grin and bear it; or smile and do it others smile and do it.

Intensity of purpose and the ability to stick to your effort is what makes you a genius.

You have to wait for your effort to show fruits. You cannot climb the top even though you have a ladder. You can ascend, to the top of the ladder step by step. In fact, anything worthwhile takes time to fructify. It takes time for a child to grow up and it takes time to build your house. It takes several years to get a Master’s Degree. It takes six months for a crop to yield paddy or wheat. You have to endure, on the path of persistence, to be a success.

What we persist in doing again and again, becomes easier.

It is not that the task has become simple or uncomplicated, It is because our ability to do the same augmented and enhanced. Do not form a habit of quitting. Most people focus only on what keeps us safe in our jobs and personal life. With this approach, higher levels of performance which involves some risk taking suffers. High performance is different from minimum acceptable standards. You have to build up the level of trust with the people working with you. If we do not recognise the good things, which happen to us every day, then every day is the same, as the previous or next day.

Appreciation, which is wonderful is the light, that dispels darkness. It is the appreciation, which cheers people, uplifts their spirits and makes them give their best. Irrespective of our status in life, we all want to be appreciated. I noticed that whenever I appreciated even the Prime Minister, I could sense a glint of pleasure on his face. Our small habits reveal as to what kind of persons we are. Basically, we all crave to be appreciated. But you must make sure that you live your values and honour the promises you make. At the same time you should examine your values, so that they are in alignment with the present environment.

Make straight talk, self-confidence, and simplicity a part and parcel of your life. These will never be outdated. For your own happiness, you need have a life style, where you live in harmony with your values. Persistently and relentlessly remain integrated with your passions and values. Do not base your conduct and your happiness, on the approval of others, if you have done your best. Free yourself from the prerequisite and restraint to have the approval of others, for each and every thing you do. If you do that you would tend to procrastinate. We all drag our feet or dawdle, whenever we face unpleasant, tedious, or distasteful tasks, hoping that the need to attend them might disappear or that someone else would come forward to take over the responsibilities. It never happens, as nothing moves, unless it is moved. Ask yourself : “What does my unconscious mind want me to know about this present moment? If I must attend to this task, why am I putting up a fuss about it?” Once we discern the reasons behind the procrastination, it becomes easier to tackle the same.

By nature and inclination, it becomes easier to be negative rather than positive.

Our efforts should be to replace the negatives with the positives. Remember that nothing in life is interesting, if you are not interested. Those who wish to sing will always find a reason and a song to sing. Anywhere you go if you like and appreciate people, you will find that everybody will be likeable. Make it a habit to note the good points of others, rather than focusing on their faults. We should do our best not to be cynics. The kingdom of heaven in the final analysis is not a place, but a state of mind. It is up to each one of us cultivate a heavenly state of mind.

“The things you are fired for are often the things that in later life you will be celebrated and given life time achievement awards for!” Francis Ford Coppola was canned for writing an “odd” and awkward script for the now legendary film Patton. The film was shelved, took years to make, and then went on to win an Oscar for best screenplay.

Meanwhile, Coppola was working on The Godfather and was also on the verge of being canned from that film. He figures the glory from the Oscar saved his butt from being fired from The Godfather…which as we all know, went down in movie making history.

If I hadn’t been rejected from art school, I’d never have written my first book. If I’d gotten that gig with the big publishing house, I wouldn’t have met The Dalai Lama. If I’d stayed in my last company, I wouldn’t be writing the White Hot Truth.

What’s “odd” is often revolutionary (change happens at the edges….beware the majority). Artistry rarely compromises, it just looks for a new place to express itself. “Good” will never, ever, ever be as deeply fine as giving it your all come hell or high water.

Thank God for failure. What failures are you grateful for?

Yet, they sell and many become best sellers. I wonder who buys these books and what do they do with them? If the books do work, there should be a gradual decline in demand for them as people would be succeeding in achieving their goals.

One reason could be that people read these books, but few bother to practice what is recommended. But I think there is a majority who do implement the suggestions but yet they continue to seek out the next self help book that comes along. Why is that?

My theory is that successful people have a formula, but there is nothing that should be considered a universal success formula.

Each one of us is unique and we have varying strengths and weaknesses in our abilities and personalities. Some of us are excellent in planning and leading a structured life, while some cannot function without a chaotic environment.

I am reminded of the Tamil silent film Pesum Padam which starred Kamal Hassan. In one scene when he is trying to sleep, he is unable to do so because he misses the cacophony of his old neighborhood. So, he makes a recording of the ambient sounds and plays it to fall asleep. Had he picked up a book instead, titled How to fall asleep! — can you imagine what would have happened? The book might have suggested all the usual things like avoid coffee or have a cup of warm milk closer to bedtime and so on. I am positive, that the book would not have had a chapter that deals with recording your neighborhood sounds and playing it back to fall asleep!

We are individuals made up of millions of components like looks, voice, height, education, etc and our personality is a sum total of all these elements. Therefore to leverage our personality to pursue success requires a very deep understanding of our constituents and the role each plays.

No doubt the self help books help by indicating possible action points to aid in a person’s development and success. However, for these to work, one needs to first understand oneself completely. Otherwise it would be like giving a map marked in Greek to someone who knows only English. One would feel that one knows where he is heading, but in reality would be completely lost.

For any self help book to be really useful one first needs to understand one’s own personal success formula.

A few things one can do towards developing the personal success formula are:

1. List all instances of achievements and success. It could be something small like wrangling a freebie at a store or a major achievement like earning a degree.
2. List all the elements that went into it in terms of effort, timing, your interaction, the reactions, how the reactions were managed, etc.
3. Look for common threads in all these instances and identify if you repeat the same knowingly or unknowingly.
4. Finally validate this by repeating the first 2 steps for all those times when things did not go well or you were unsuccessful.

This exercise would help identify and make you aware of the uniqueness that you bring to the table. It could something as simple as a smile or a sincere look. Maybe when you smile, your face transforms and communicates something powerful. Once a person has this insight and knowledge about himself then, applying self help action points becomes easier. And more importantly you will start to repeat some action points that enhance your uniqueness and eliminate the others that are counter productive. From this state of awareness, your personal success formula will emerge and take form.

People who know this and are scripting their success formulas also read self help books. It is just that they don’t blindly try to follow instructions. They pick and choose from each and craft their own success formula.
Lastly, one should never try passing on a personal success formula to anyone because most probably it might not work. Like I said, every successful person has a formula, but there are no success formulas.

Success comes with a price of failure. We were meant to grow and learn from our mistakes. How much we have paid for the lessons of failure determines our next step to success.

Generally we do not wish to face failure because we get depressed. But without knowing the bad thing how can one appreciate the good thing? We take a lot of precautions to avoid failure but at one time or other every one is certain to face it in one way or other.

Every achievement has a very big failure story woven in it somewhere. The only thing we need to understand here is that we should be ready to face failure with resilience while waiting for the right moment to convert it into success.

God has already given this determination to all of us the moment we born. Every child possesses an inner impulse to develop beyond limitations. This could be observed in his or her first attempts in learning how to walk. Toddlers fail many times while learning how to make those first steady steps but will learn from their errors and keep trying until success comes along. Walking is the major achievement of kids. As their mobility improves, so does their ability to investigate new areas of interest.

Abraham Lincoln said, “Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.”

We all know this very well and yet as we grow up we forget our childhood enthusiam and get depressed the moment we face failure.

Let us persevere with conviction when seeking success, the seeds of which are usually waiting to sprout from our first failed attempts.

Allow me to help you WIN… and WIN in every single thing you do… 

Come; let’s make winning a habit; a very easy habit; a habit that calls for constant and persistent practice of the mind… Most of us are made to believe that winning is something complicated…  BUT THE TRUTH is otherwise…. Winning is quite simple and easy…. And it becomes a habit – once we decide to carry an attitude of a winner… perpetual winners…in our minds…..

When you look around, do you see that most of the Winners, win again and again, and win always, seldom failing in anything?! Yes; they DO. And there is no denying the practice, continuous knowledge acquisition, mental and physical challenges these top winners undergo…. BUT THE MOST CRITICAL INGREDIENT of their constant and increasing success is their mental make up…. When they play, they play ONLY to win…..When they work, they work only to WIN…. When they plan LIFE, they plan ONLY to win… The cardinal LIFE rule they follow is PLAY TO WIN…. And WIN TO PLAY…..

Think about this…..How many acts and deeds you do, be it big or small, when you do, commence, you get in with a plan ONLY to WIN… a decisive, unassailable and incorrigible mental frame that says to you ”I am at the winners stand, receiving the accolades the winner takes….”? And if you can take time to pause for a few moments and introspect, you would discover for SURE that whenever you entered the fray – the fray of the deed or act, in any context – WITH THE VICTORY in mind, you eventually WON with remarkable ease….

I would like to illustrate this with one of my own life’s instances…. In the first year of my college, a group of friends were at the cafeteria; and suddenly one of my good friends came saying that there is a extempore oratory contest in the college… Suddenly, my eyes sparkled, and there was so much of energy gushing into my mind… and I went ahead to the contest – amongst about 20 of my college mates – and extempore I spoke so well that I got a standing ovation, and the whole college know me from then on… there was no looking back in speaking contests, intercollege debates etc.

I can confidently tell you now that, more than anything else – my knowledge of the subject, my diction, my command of the language, what made me what I became was my getting into the contest with my mental chemistry… In my mind, I refused to see anything but WINNING..  and the most importantly, my thought process only hovered around what I wanted…and I was just ignorant of anything else.. who I was competing with, the topic, the podium, the audience etc was all of less importance…

Sure, most of you have these WINNING moments in your lives too…. And just think of those moments again and again…. What comes to the fore is the mindset and decisive urge to Win…. and be always at the victory stand.…

Bottom line is this… YOU FIRST WIN in your MIND… and then in the DEED… This is the universal rule of winning all through LIFE….

In all your endeavors, get into the first step ONLY with WINNING in the mind… If there is an iota of doubt or wavering, realize that, and consciously train and command your MIND to Win….. You will win… YOU WILL WIN.

Persistence could communicate different meanings to different people, depending upon how it is interpreted, imaged and communicated – but by far it is the most singular differentiator and determinant for success in any endeavour. Just pick up any literature in goals and success – a Brian Tracy, Robin Sharma, Tony Robbins or a Brian Mayne – and be sure that this is mentioned.

And persistence is not about those huge and impossible tasks which we need to sweat it out to do. It is just having the mental strength and ability to ‘persist’ in doing that simple task that would lead to some accomplishment, set as a goal in one’s life.

To be just able to spend 30 minutes a day, consistently, in developing or nurturing a life skill, would lead to an achievement that would still be great and big enough to make a life difference. This could be hard exercising if one looks at a physical goal, writing 2 pages a day if it is a career and passion goal, or spending 30 minutes uninterrupted with spouse and son/daughter if it is a family goal. While it might appear to be a small thing at the outset, the key challenge here would be consistency – doing it everyday sans a break, and at the same time, and most important, in a ‘positive mental frame’.

Winning is a habit and outcome of persistence. And believe me, if one wants to win in life and all personal endeavours, being persistent will be the biggest differentiator.

Creating new habits is all about persistence. Just try to commit yourself to a new habit – as trivial as waking up 30 minutes early every day – the mental challenge and the accompanying physical challenge will be immense. You will need the power of the mind and a diehard commitment – a communiqué to the subconscious – to ensure that this happens.

The easier side in this is that you need to stretch only for 21 days and then it becomes natural – a habit that stays with you for life – and most importantly facilitates accomplishment in any area. I would suggest that everyone wanting to live life read and commit themselves to The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, the fable by Robin Sharma.

To make persistence a winning habit, I would urge – please, please strive to stretch your mind that extra bit to do something everyday. That something would be a key life skill or a winning quality in professional or personal life – anything you think is worth doing and trying.

Persist, create a winning habit and succeed! !

Without a seed of thought of success in the mind, no amount of gargantuan effort will invite success in reality. After all, isn’t all we need and want first created in the mind, and then subsequently in reality?  With that being so, how can ‘success’ be any different? To attain success, extend it, and multiply it to all facets of life. First and foremost, feel it in the mind.

So being a successful man, woman, son, daughter, boss, subordinate…is first thought and rehearsed in the mind. It is only this dress rehearsal in our mind that transforms itself into real success in every walk of life.

Nothing succeeds like success, is also putting the famous ‘law of attraction’ to work for us. One single and continuous thought of success in the mind, attracts more and more success in the mind, and that one thought in the mind manifesting to reality, attracts the manifestation of all thoughts of success into reality, thus creating successful lives for us.

Right now, commit to planting that seed of success thought in your mind. Think more success, attract more success. Fill your life with success. After all, nothing succeeds like success. Nothing will ever succeed like having success in our minds.

Life also presents opportunities and they too are everywhere. We need to be cognizant to keep our eyes and ears open so an opportunity doesn’t pass us by. Networking and career opportunities can be found in the most inconspicuous places; talking to the guy sitting next to you at the airport, the woman in line at the grocery store or talking to the guy at the next table during lunch. The word “hello” opens doors; you just need to choose to be the person who is bold enough to say it.

This brings me to “Choiceortunities” where choice meets opportunity. Making the right choices when opportunity presents itself is critical to making the most of that opportunity. How many times do we think to ourselves, “I wish I had done that differently” or “if I could only do it over again”.  Maximizing our opportunities through our choices or choiceortunities; how do we do it?

Scenario. 

So let’s say that guy next to you at lunch is a manager at a company you’d love to work for. You find this information out by saying “Hello, how are you?” you’ve made the choice to open the door. The two of you have a nice little chat about current events (keep it neutral, no politics or religion); the weather and you each throw a name or two around in a “Do you know…” banter.  What next? 

Ask for a business card.

Wait a day or two.

Then email and let him know how nice it was to meet him, let him know how much you respect the company he works for and after giving a brief synopsis of your experience let him know that should any opportunities present themselves that you might be a fit for, to please let you know. Ask him if it would be OK to send your resume to him. Follow up as appropriate but don’t go overboard, it is important to be respectful and subtle.

If you see any “good news” in the local paper about him or the company, write another email acknowledging the effort and congratulating the success. If you formally apply for a job at his company, let him know and forward your resume to him.  Ask him for insight into the position; people in management love to talk! Go back to the place you had lunch from time to time to see if he is there. People are creatures of habit and it is likely that you will run into him again. Watch the company’s website for their upcoming events. Are they hosting a charity or community event? If so, attend who knows who else you might meet.

The moral of the blog is to always be on the lookout for opportunities and then back up those opportunities with wise choices that have the potential of heading in the direction you envision yourself going. Choiceortunities are everywhere and heck maybe by next year at this time it’ll even be a real word in the dictionary. Now there is a choiceortunity for “Mr. Webster”;)

Here is a contrarian thought. Ignore your inherent weaknesses, and spend all the time and resources in honing your inherent strengths. You will do a lot of good to you, your life, and work. 

Many contemporary leadership lessons speak of the need to do what you are good at. Decisively identify your strengths and do something which is pretty close to your core competence.

You have a handful of a mix of shining gold coins, and some rusted old copper coins. You would do good to just ignore the rusty dusty copper coins and just put all your time and energy into how well you can exploit and make good of the gold coins on hand.  Wasting your time and energy on cleaning and making the rusty copper coins is really not going to move you up in life. You would be wasting your time. And the cardinal rule in managing time is – putting time to its best use here and now. So, your time is not going to be best used by cleaning the rust and dust of the copper in you. Just do not give any importance to the copper in you (weaknesses) and hone your gold (strengths) now and always.

Most of us have been taught and guided to convert our weaknesses into strengths… and believe me, if you have ever worked on any of your weaknesses for some considerable time, you will testify to the fact that it takes a lot of time with disproportionately small or miniscule results. So just for the sake of wishful thinking that we can completely overcome our weaknesses and even convert them into strengths (?), we expend so much energy… at times to the point of being frustrated.  By doing this, we lose precious time and energy – precious resources that should have been used in focusing on the positives within us and getting to the point of perfection.

So why are we speaking and doing so much to ‘work on weaknesses’.  Many business leaders I know have opined that working on weaknesses is not a great personal growth strategy. More can be achieved by getting more time and focus into what you are good at.

Pick up three to five things you are good at and make them to the point of being great! See the difference it makes in your life.

1. Put up with temporary disorganisation.

If you want to know whether you’re in a state of confused goal-building, there’s one way to tell: take a look at your desk. It’ll be an absolute mess. The confusion of this stage is always reflected in the confusion of your work space. Because you’re trying out different ideas and gathering lots of information, you’ll have odds and ends of notes, scraps of paper with ideas on, half-started plans, bullet lists of things to do. Don’t worry. This is totally normal. Just make sure you have a clear out frequently and don’t lose some of the great seedling ideas hidden in there.

2. Learn to live with frustration.

Along with confusion, the early stage of goal-building is also accompanied with frustration. Well, why are you surprised? If you want something and don’t see a quick and easy way to get it, you’re bound to feel frustrated. That’s OK. It’s just your inner child – who always got what it wanted when it wanted it – having a tantrum. The grown-up version has to be a little more restrained. Like Thomas Edison who calmly, patiently and without frustration, carried out over 1000 failed experiments before he discovered the right way to build a light bulb.

3. Grow roots.

I know you may not believe me, but the state of confusion is the most important stage of goal-building. This is the stage that determines whether you’re going to succeed or not. You may not believe that. In fact, you may long for a bit of clear daylight where everything is routine, not chaos, orderly not muddled, and plain sailing instead of hitting your head against endless brick walls. But, listen. Think of yourself as a plant that’s just been sown. How magnificent a specimen you’re going to be isn’t determined by above-ground growth, but by below-ground roots.

4. Keep asking.

“What’s The Lesson Here?”. Many people who go through the early stages of goal-building measure their progress by how much they’re advancing towards their goal. Don’t do that. After all, if you’re putting down roots, you’re probably advancing in all directions except the ones you’ll be finally moving in. Instead, measure your progress by what you’re learning. When you can learn from every day’s confusion and frustration, you’re making huge leaps forward. Not just in your knowledge and skills, but in your personal strength. That’s why writer Trevor Bentley describes the stage of confusion as “the height of wisdom”.

5. Keep your morale high.

If this all sounds too easy, take heart. Having been through many states of confusion and frustration on the route to my goals, I know exactly how it feels. Some days it feels like treading treacle. The rest of the world seems to be getting on with their lives while you’re stuck in no man’s land. All you want to do is give up and settle for something easier. Well, that’s OK… for a brief spell. But don’t give up. If you feel down – and it’s almost certain you will from time to time – give your morale a boost. Slow down. Chill out. Find some successes. And know with absolute certainty that one day soon you’ll come out of the state of confusion and be within reach of your goal.

6. Let the creative process work.

Getting through confusion is inevitable if you stick with it. Why? Because your creative brain will work it out for you. Imagine that your brain is an exact replica of the mess on your desk. Lots of bits of information all unconnected. While your desk won’t do anything about it, your brain will. It will try to find connections between all the dead ends. That’s why sooner or later, and often in an unguarded moment when you’re not expecting it, things will suddenly fall into place. That’s when you’ll get a eureka moment, an “ah-ah” insight, and a shaft of clear light that means you’re coming out of confusion.

Someone once said that trying to reach a big big goal – like making a million pounds (dollars, rupees…) – was no different from learning how to drive a car or play a musical instrument. It’s about learning to do something you couldn’t do before. The goal may be different in each case but the process is the same. 99 out of 100 people who start the process give up when confusion clouds their way. Why not be the 1 who doesn’t?

–

Eric Garner is one of the foremost leaders in management and personal development with a personal guarantee to make you a better manager, trainer, and learner. His company, ManageTrainLearn, runs corporate training programmes in the UK and since 2002 has published a website at www.managetrainlearn.com that provides a wide range of exclusive digital learning products.

Rajasthan Royals started off as the underdogs and went on to win the Indian Premier League (IPL 2008 season). 2008 culminated with two significant achievements from the underdogs’ camp. India’s successful moon mission and Barack Obama!

Underdog theme continues to inspire every day. With AR Rehman being crowned as the Hollywood music king and lesser known crew from Slumdog Millionaire winning all the awards ever instituted in the international film circles, underdogs have added another feather to their cap!

Well, who exactly is an underdog? There are a few interesting theories on the phrase derivation of “underdogs” and “top dogs”, dating back to the 19th century stories on wood-sawing and dog fights. The latest derivation claim in 20th century relates to an article in the Sports Review on prize hunting or hunting dogs! Wherever it originated from, according to me, an underdog is the “who’s so what?” and a top dog is the “who is who”.

The audience love underdogs in a competition. You know why? There are two reasons, and these reasons have evolved depending on the political, social and economic climate of the time and place.

Reason 1: The audience consider themselves the master and want to see the underdog succumb to them to satiate their thirst for supremacy.

Remember the ancient Romans and their arena fights? Impoverished slaves used to fight the ultimate roman fighting machine (a knight) or a tiger. The slaves used to muster up even the last ounce of survival instinct to fight a losing battle and eventually succumb to the master!

Reason 2: The audience can actually empathize not just sympathize, with the underdog and root for it to become the top dog!

The American presidential election in 2008 is a classic example. People loved Barack Obama the underdog! The son of an African-American immigrant, father of 2 kids, who has struggled hard to be where he is, has no personal business affiliations, not just another candidate who claimed patriotism via war hysteria. The people of America could actually relate to him… because most of them had been there sometime or the other in their lives.

Apart from these reasons as to why any audience love underdogs in a competition, there is an important element which an underdog brings on board. It is the “power of possibility”! There is an ever lurking chance that the underdog might win and “upset” the party or as with changing times there is an immense possibility of crowning a new champion.

As it is rightly called the Champions League Football Tournament is a testimony to the fact that underdogs are interesting! The tournament has a complex structure and one can rest assured that only a true champion can emerge out of it! The year was 2004, the year of underdogs; the 3 of the final 4 playing for the cup were lesser known clubs. FC Porto, Deportivo La Coruña, AS Monaco. The 4th club was Chelsea. FC Porto won the cup! It was led by a then unknown man, José Mourinho! This underdog went on to become the top-dog in football circuit. He became a champion in his first season and a double premier league winner with the famous Chelsea football club, brand ambassador for Samsung mobile and the theme of many a best sellers capped by his authorized biography “Made in Portugal”. This champion is an inspiring example of the underdog to top dog story.

There are umpteen such stories that have been told so far and all have been massive hits at the box office and they will continue to be! Rocky, The mighty ducks, Waterboy,  Dodgeball: A true underdog story, Lagaan, Taare Zamin par, Slumdog Millionaire, just to list a few famous ones. Every movie went on to win Oscars or nominations at least! In a website for film reviews, Anthony Chatfield a freelance writer notes, “Underdog themed stories will never die. They capture an aspect of everyday life that we all feel at one point or another Рthat desire to belong and be respected…” It is so true!

We can now understand why people love underdogs and the value addition they bring on board. But who creates these underdogs? I think it is just a state of mind. It is purely a perspective of the “who’s who” about “who’s so what”!

Rajasthan Royals, ISRO, Barack Obama, AR Rehman, the crew of Slumdog Millionaire, José Mourinho listed in this article are all extraordinary. They always had high quality content! Over a period of time, the “who’s who” or pros become complacent and think that some entities in a competition both do not have the required talent or depth and hence don’t give them a chance of winning! What they fail to understand is that it is actually the underdog who filters the ordinary from the extra-ordinary and brings out the true champion.

Given that this is a perspective issue and not an actual problem of being the underdog, is it cool to be an underdog? And importantly, how do you know if you are an underdog?

In my opinion it is OK to be the underdog at times in a given system. During the process of working your way through the system, as an underdog, you have an advantage which no one has. Your innate talent mixed with the absence of “fear of failure” makes a charming cocktail, which, when served, rocks the system and catapults you to the rock star status!

You realize that you are the underdog when people around you consistently say that you have the talent and you don’t have any fear of failure! So, how long do you remain an underdog? Not long… the moment you achieve certain goals within a system and get recognized you are no longer considered an underdog! A fear of failure sets in and inhibits one from experimenting. Then, how do you become a top dog?

Underdogs enhance a competition; they inspire and enable people to aspire, they present unlimited possibilities! The connotation of underdog might not be all that positive, but definitely it is not negative. To become a top dog, you need to shed your fear of failure. Continue to experiment and learn, never underestimate your competition as underdog, for, underdogs are not someone whom you ignore, but someone you watch out for. I love to quote great leaders and opinion makers. One such quote from Mahatma Gandhi is “First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.” To turn yourself into a top dog, draw inspiration from underdogs!

So, next time you watch a movie or a game of football or if you are listening to sales pitch or evaluating a competition or interviewing prospective employees, look out for the underdog!

You might win yourself a champion!

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Sundararaman Viswanathan is engineer by qualification, manager by profession, aspiring writer and a wannabe entrepreneur at heart. He currently works as a Transition Manager, with vast experience in managing the support of mission critical IT systems.

Break your goals

Take action; take massive action on the goals that you have set. When you have one step forward, that is progress. Confucius had a saying that “If you know something and you do not act upon it, it is as though you know nothing.” Don’t fall into the trap of NATO (No Action Talk Only). Receiving knowledge would be great and it would be power, but applying that knowledge would be real power. Action speaks louder than words. Samuel Langhorne Clemens better known as Mark Twain, the American author and humorist, had a saying “The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one.” Every drop makes an ocean and a small leak could sink a great ship. When we have big dreams, we set big goals. Sometimes it is important to break them into smaller goals, going one-baby-step-at-a-time mode.

Don’t change your destination, just alter your course.

Confucius had another saying “When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.” You cannot change the direction of the wind but you can always adjust your sail. One of the key principles is be adaptive to situations and adjust yourself and your goals. As the famous martial artist and film star, Bruce Lee had a saying “Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless–like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup, you put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, you put it in a teapot, and it becomes the teapot. Now water can ‘flow’ or it can ‘crash’! Be water, my friend.”

It is not only about finishing the race but running the marathon of life.

Slow and steady. Don’t rush into the solution, take your time. Confucius had yet another saying “It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” Also remember not to be too slow. To get you started off in running might be difficult, but as you get the hang of it, always remember to maintain your momentum.

Do not be a soccer ball of other people’s opinion.

You might have heard of this story of the grandfather, boy and the donkey. The grandfather and the boy actually carried the donkey to their destination. People will always be there to share their opinion; you make the choice and decide. Stand out from the crowd and be different – It is better to be a somebody on a nobody’s island than to be a nobody on a somebody’s island. Mark Twain had another saying “Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”

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Santhanaram Jayaram, is principal consultant for 2Be3 Consultancy & WSQ trainer. Currently lecturing in management, marketing and international business and training in the field of business communication, relationship management, work improvement team, problem solving & decision making,  innovation and laughter at work & customer service.

If you spend your time avoiding obstacles – you get frustration and “what ifs” and regrets.

If you are looking to live without a job, you may not even RECOGNIZE your obstacles!

Here are the top 3 obstacles my clients work through with me:

Obstacle #1:  You don’t know how.

Every new endeavor will require learning new things.  And that to me is exciting!  Don’t let the “how” derail you.

Here’s a secret.  Change the “how” to “what.”  What is it you want?  What do you need to do next?   It may take time to percolate…but you will get your answers.  Keep moving in the direction you want.

Here’s an example.  In 2003 I decided I wanted to go to Italy in 2004.  I didn’t know “how.”  I didn’t know how I would justify and pay for a vacation. I didn’t know which cities I’d visit.  I didn’t know how I’d travel solo with no Italian language skills.

AND I didn’t let those perceived obstacles stop me. I wrote it down on my goals list.  Then I told 3 people within 2 days, “I am going to Italy in 2004.”  It was a done deal.

I bought a guidebook on Italy.  I took out my passport and left it in plain view.  I put up a photo of Venice as the background setting on my computer so I could see it often.

And then…a brochure came in the mail from a professional career development organization I belonged to.

Their 2004 annual meeting was to be held in… Venice!

So now it was starting to come together.  I could write off most of the travel costs to a business trip.

I’d have a starting place with colleagues so I could get comfortable before venturing out on my own.

I had a beginning destination.  I booked the trip…went…had a fabulous time!

Obstacle #2.  Your ego and identity around work.

One of the biggest obstacles I faced when leaving my last job was my mighty ego.

I had worked a long time to get the title…the nice office…in a beautiful marble filled building…a prestigious organization…and yet I was miserable…

Not at first.…I loved the work for more than 15 years…but when it was time to go out on my own…I was worried about losing the prestige…who would I be if I was just Ann Ronan, on my own…working from home?

Well it didn’t take me long to figure out that who I was …was happy.  Now I really get that doing work that makes me happy is the greatest reward of all.

Obstacle 3.  Listening to the wrong people

Those who secretly long to be their own boss are often full of bad advice for people who are on the verge of taking the leap.

How many of you were encouraged to be self-employed when you were a kid?  Probably not too many!  It just wasn’t understood or valued by most of our parents and teachers.

Protect your dream early on…nurture it like a seed and be careful who you expose it to.

Those who love you most may not be able to support you at first…they are concerned and fearful for you.

Keep learning about self employment…keep taking your steps with the encouragement of those who CAN support you…and when your loved ones see your success…they will share in your joy.

Paying attention, doing the thing that needs doing and realization that it IS (you are in the middle of your dream!) are the three elements that are needed for “living the dream”.

Anything in life that happens starts with an idea. So let’s start with the dreaming part. We all dream, either aware of our dreams or just idly wishing in a daydream. In his book, The Three Only Things, author Robert Moss says that dreams are so more prevalent in history than we realize.  Great discoveries were made often in dream states by scientists.   We all have dreams, and some are significant and others are just leftover brain fluff from a long tiring day. Even daydreaming can lead to some brilliant ideas and aha moments. Sometimes, answers to huge problems come in dreams or warnings show us that we need to take a different path. Paying attention to those ideas or bits and pieces that come daily to our mind are crucial. Once you have the dream of what you want, you have to take some action. As Robert Moss states in his book, “What we can imagine has a tendency to become real in our bodies and our world.”

This is the big part of the equation, becoming real – emphasis on the word “big”. Planning, revising, editing, making mistakes, turning a matter upside down, just DOING it is the matter of manifesting your ideas into reality.   You have to have stamina, vision, incredible work ethics, and good old fashioned endurance to make things happen in the physical world. A good chunk of faith in your self is always a necessary ingredient to this process. Probably most important to this whole idea is to surround yourself with other people who believe in you and your dream! The energy of good vibes can never be discounted. Get those people on board your own train of grand plans, chugging along to wonderland!

The final piece is the most misunderstood, and sometimes someone else has to remind you of it. When do you know you arrived? Or do you ever get there? Or does it matter? How do you know you are “living the dream” when you are in the middle of it?

Does a fish know it is surrounded by water? Do birds know they are surrounded by air? Do you know if you are surrounded by all the things you have dreamed of?  Fish and birds may or may not know; we can’t take a poll and ask them. But when you are in the flow…you just know. Your energy is up, people want some of what you have got going on, and they want to be part of it. You attract more good stuff into your life, and despite setbacks and some difficulties, the direction always leads you into the next step, and into more ideas, and more growth, The old saying, “If you ain’t growing, you’re dying” is a perfect yardstick. 

A good question to ask yourself is, “What am I doing toward living my dream?”  The answer(s) may take you by surprise and turn your heart and head in a brand new direction!

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Margaisa the Fairy Godmother aka Peggy Barry Bartz owns A Rose in The Road, a multi-faceted company that encourages, entertains and enlightens hearts. Visit her web site www.aroseintheroad.com.

With the countless negativity’s the world brings about, how do we keep motivated? Try on the tips I prepared from A to Z…

A – Achieve your dreams. Avoid negative people, things and places. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “the future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” Consume yourself with the motivation to achieve tremendous results from everything you attempt

B – Believe in your self, and in what you can do. Motivation comes from within, if you trust in your abilities you will come out on top.

C – Consider things on every angle and aspect. Motivation comes from determination. To be able to understand life, you should feel the sun from both sides. Never say never, there is a way of accomplishing anything if you keep an open mind and never give up.

D – Don’t give up and don’t give in. Thomas Edison failed once, twice, more than thrice before he came up with his invention and perfected the incandescent light bulb. Make motivation as your steering wheel. The only way you lose for sure is when you quit.

E – Enjoy. Work as if you don’t need money. Dance as if nobody’s watching. Love as if you never cried. Learn as if you’ll live forever. Motivation takes place when people are happy. Maintain a positive attitude under any circumstance. Fill your mind with positive thoughts and the whole world will be your playground.

F – Family and Friends – are life’s greatest ‘F’ treasures. Don’t loose sight of them. So often we look past our greatest treasures, remain motivated to always seek the treasures in your family bonds.

G – Give more than what is enough. Where does motivation and self improvement take place? At work? At home? At school? When you exert extra effort in doing things. Try to give more than what is asked of you, this shows true self motivation.

H – Hang on to your dreams. They may dangle in there for a moment, but these little stars will be your driving force. Dreams keep us motivated to go after the things that excite us in life. Holding onto your dreams shows a strength in your character of positive expectations.

I – Ignore those who try to destroy you. Don’t let other people to get the best of you. Stay away from toxic people – the kind of friends who hates to hear about your success. Surround yourself with positive people and you will all keep each other motivated to seek out the positives in life.

J – Just be yourself. The key to success is to be yourself. And the key to failure is to try to please everyone. Believe in your strengths and live by your positive terms.

K – keep trying no matter how hard life may seem. When a person is motivated, eventually he sees a harsh life finally clearing out, paving the way to self improvement. Motivation keeps you striving for the best, hang onto the values brought on through positive thinking.

L – Learn to love yourself. Now isn’t that easy? You cannot give love to others unless you love yourself. Learn how to motivate yourself into working on your own personal development. You will never grow as a person until you learn to take responsibility for your own self improvement.

M – Make things happen. Motivation is when your dreams are put into work clothes. Motivation is one of the strongest characteristics you can have. When you live your life filled with motivation you become a person who really gets things done.

N – Never lie, cheat or steal. Always play a fair game. A person with a good moral standing will go further in life than an unmotivated cheat. Never look for short-cuts to good things, this will lead to missed opportunities and challenging possibilities.

O – Open your eyes. People should learn the horse attitude and horse sense. They see things in 2 ways – how they want things to be, and how they should be. Life is full of possibilities, keep the motivation to go after the wonders in the world.

P – Practice makes perfect. Practice is about motivation. It lets us learn repertoire and ways on how can we recover from our mistakes. Maintaining the motivation to work hard towards the things you truly want out of life will bring you more rewards than sitting back and expecting things to happen.

Q – Quitters never win. And winners never quit. So, choose your fate – are you going to be a quitter? Or a winner?

R – Ready yourself. Motivation is also about preparation. We must hear the little voice within us telling us to get started before others will get on their feet and try to push us around. Remember, it wasn’t raining when Noah build the ark. The boy scout motto is “Be Prepared” and this is a way of life we should all adapt to.

S – Stop procrastinating. Nothing kills motivation more then procrastination. Choose to spend your time accomplishing positive things in your life.

T – Take control of your life. Discipline or self control jives synonymously with motivation. Both are key factors in self improvement. When you know what you want out of life and you are motivated to work towards the attainment of your dreams, you will accomplish more then the average person lacking motivation.

U – Understand others. If you know very well how to talk, you should also learn how to listen. Yearn to understand first, and to be understood the second. Understanding another persons problems in life and being motivated to offer help to others, builds your own character.

V – Visualize it. Motivation without vision is like a boat on a dry land. Your mind can bring you whatever you desire in life. Visualize success and success will be yours, visualize defeat or loss and failure will encompass your life. Maintain the motivation to visualize success and achievements.

W – Want it more than anything. Dreaming means believing. And to believe is something that is rooted out from the roots of motivation and self improvement. When you have strong wants this leads to the motivation to attain what you truly desire.

X – X Factor is what will make you different from the others. When you are motivated, you tend to put on “extras” on your life like extra time for family, extra help at work, extra care for friends, and so on. Set yourself apart from others, stand out in the crowd, hold your head up high with pride and conviction.

Y – You are unique. No one in this world looks, acts, or talks like you. Value your life and existence, because you’re just going to spend it once. Use the fact that you are one of a kind to excel at everything you do in life. True motivation is for you and you alone, use it to move forward in life, show your uniqueness.

Z – Zero in on your dreams and go for it!!! Never lose your motivation to go after your dreams because living your dreams means you are living your life.

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The level of our personal motivation is usually determined by the strength of our own personal development. If you are interested in more relevant information to help you with your own motivation please visit:
http://www.positive-thinking-for-you.com/
http://www.nlp-self-help.com/

Artwork by Favio Castan provided by author.

We are all faced with our challenges, whether it is a physical handicap like I talked about in my article “Yes I can”, people in our lives telling us we can’t do it or our own attitude preventing us from moving forward. I and my staff are fortunate that we get to watch students and grads face their challenges head on and conquer them. They have no idea what they give back to us by merely letting us share in their journey; it is a gift and every gift brings a new life lesson.

We had a great day in Career Services today; and here is why.

Today we feel like we opened a door. A door that we hope leads to opportunities that will launch the career of one of our very special graduates. To understand the way we feel you have to understand our friend Lori and her journey to today.

Lori started with Herzing College Online in 2006; she is blind in one eye and has almost no vision in her “good eye”. In order to be successful in college, she needed special software that magnifies the computer screen by 700% allowing her to read each word, letter by letter, meticulously and slowly. Enrolled in the medical billing and insurance coding program she spent the totality of her education not looking at her test scores because she was afraid of failing and just didn’t want to know. If you have ever seen a medical billing and coding book you know what an amazing undertaking it was for Lori, the material is complex, specific and requires accuracy, a challenge for an able-visioned person. Lori graduated in 2008 with a 3.89 GPA; an honors student.

It is now time for our department to swing into action and help our new graduate find a job. We’ve spammed every medical clinic, hospital, nursing home and healthcare facility in Atlanta, Georgia with Lori’s resume and she has been given the opportunity to interview with several offices. Yet she hasn’t received an employment offer; after seeing her coke bottle glasses and visual limitations employers just aren’t interested despite her medical billing and coding abilities, caring demeanor and determination. It has been six months and Team Lori has had no luck.

In late December I shared with our new President Lori’s story and the unique challenges of helping graduates with a disability like Lori’s. He raised his eyebrow and asked me how it was that we were going to help her get employed. I replied that I know that there is an employer out there that will see the potential in her and give her a chance. It is just a matter of finding them.

This is the moment that revelation hit.

“I am going to send her resume to every eye doctor in Atlanta, GA, surely an eye doctor will understand her disability, and surely they will see that all Lori needs to be successful is a magnifying glass and a chance.” And that was it; a magnifying glass. We’re going to send out Lori’s resume with a cover letter in the tiniest font possible and include a magnifying glass in hopes that some medical office out there will do just that…give Lori a chance.

So today the staff gathered together to work on Lori’s resume project. Tammy printed itty, bitty cover letters and Lori’s resume. Kay signed the letters and stuffed the envelopes. Tammy and I added the magnifying glasses and sealed them; all the while saying positive mantras out loud along with the recipients names. You are probably already thinking we are crazy but it gets better. You know how people throw salt over their shoulders for good luck? Well we decided that for additional luck, we would “salt” the resumes before we sent them. All seven of us took a turn shaking salt on Lori’s letters thinking positive employment thoughts and hoping for a positive outcome before turning them over to the mailbox. Call us crazy, but it couldn’t hurt and at most we wasted a little salt and it was a fun team bonding moment.

Lori has touched each of us in Career Services in some capacity. She always has positive words to say and a hopeful outlook that is contagious. You can’t talk to Lori on the phone and not smile; it’s not possible. Unlike the other staff, I have had the pleasure of meeting Lori in person and the opportunity to give her a big hug, an opportunity we are rarely afforded in the world of online education. I’ve seen in person the “light” that is Lori and thank Herzing for that opportunity. Today we hope that we are able to give back to Lori by bringing to the surface “her employer”. The job she will fit in, that will benefit from her talents and that won’t see her disability but her capabilities. We all go to bed tonight hoping we opened that door for Lori and can’t wait to celebrate with her when she calls to tell us she received a job offer.

Please join us in sending well wishes to Atlanta and if you are a doctor’s office in Atlanta…call me, I’d like to tell you about one of our graduates.

(Blogged with Lori’s permission; she wants the world to know that a disability is not a limitation.)

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Amy is the Director of Career Services at Herzing College Online and teaches career development courses for the online campus. Email her at achastek@onl.herzing.edu or visit http://www.herzingonline.edu.

Along your journey you will experience failure.     You have to be able to pick yourself up and continue.

There are times when you have to stand alone. Other people will distrust you. They will challenge you. There are people in this world who will even try to get you to compromise your values or get you to change your success goal. They may not be doing so intentionally or they may be fearful that if you grow, they will be left behind.

You will face deep disappointment.There are going to be times when the promise was there, you were about to get hold of that deal that would tip you over the edge to success, or meet the right person. But it was just at the wrong time. It is easy to get depressed at such times, to become miserable with the cards you’ve been dealt.

A friend of mine used to be miserable and depressed, but now he’s completely turned his life around and is depressed and miserable instead.

Others will resent your progress.Every time you make some progress, there will be some people who don’t like it. We learn in physics that motion causes friction. Your progress towards your success causes friction too – causing some people you pass by to get hot under the collar.

One definition of commitment is “hard work and determination whatever the circumstances.”

Ken Blanchard distinguishes between being interested in something and commitment to something:

“When you’re interested in something, you do it only when it’s convenient. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results.

Staying on the road

If you’ve been on your own journey for any length of time, some if not all of this you know. Yet, there are many people who’ve achieved their success. And many who’ve achieved things far greater than you set out to achieve. So how do you achieve your success?

# First of all – you need to know what ‘success’ is for you. Whether you see ‘success’ as being your goal, or the journey towards a goal.

Now count the cost of your ‘success’. All of it. The time, the effort, the mental anguish, the miserable days, the depressed days, the friends and enemies you accumulate on the way.

Determine to pay the price. The journey for any worthwhile goal is long, troublesome and difficult. It will not happen overnight. Don’t believe the short-cut secret silver bullets. Expect it to be difficult and you won’t be surprised (except pleasantly). Face up to the fact that anything worth having is going to be a struggle.

Keep a good attitude. Yes the journey is tough. Yes, it’s difficult. Yes you should have achieved it all so much more easily. Tough! Life is difficult! Now get back up on your feet, and smile at the world. I may not be where I want to be, but I’m a whole lot better than I used to be. I will prevail and I will cross my finish line.

Strive for excellence. A great craftsman invites you to inspect his work and admire the intricate details and want to explain in detail how it was done. A sloppy person, on the other hand, hides their work. Shoddy workers blame their tools, the materials or someone else.

You want to achieve your success. You know that you have talent and you know you have the skills. Do you have the commitment to keep on keeping on?

Talent alone is not enough. Talent is the gift God gave you. Skills are what you used yesterday.

Commitment is what you put in today to create your masterpiece and have success tomorrow.

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If you have ever watched the film “A Wonderful Life”, with Jimmy Stewart, you will see how the butterfly effect works. The film by the same name, “The Butterfly Effect”, is also a great example of this powerful law.

In the first film a man is down on his luck and tries to commit suicide. When an angel appears and rescues him, the man makes a wish that he had never been born or existed. The angel grants him his wish. The man then views and interacts with the world as though he had never been born and sees how people, places, events and outcomes have changed because he was not there to change them through his interaction with them. Even small things he had done made big changes because in this reality he had not done them!

The second film shows how one man can time travel to his own past. Merely by looking at a picture from his past he can enter that time and the body of his former self while retaining all his knowledge about the present. He then uses this ability to make small changes that have a dramatic effect on his world when he returns to his own time.

Both these films show how small events can dramatically change future events.

Using the same principle you can make small, minor and almost insignificant changes in your life now that will have a dramatic effect on your future through the butterfly effect. A stone thrown into a pond will create small ripples that travel far!

How many times have we heard of a person who buys a lottery ticket on a whim and wins a fortune? This small act had a dramatic and huge impact on all areas of their life! Although this may be an extreme example, that is not common, ordinary small changes can have just as much of an impact over time.

Paul Burrell, butler to the Queen and princess Diana, had the chance to join a cruise ship or Buckingham Palace. His mother hid the cruise acceptance letter and gave him the acceptance letter from Buckingham Palace. This one small event changed a man’s life forever!

Paul Burrell went from an almost enviable life of eventually working down the mines in his home town, with poverty and hardship all around him, to working directly for the Queen, then Prince Charles, then Princess Diana. Now he is a multi-millionaire television celebrity!

From little acorns grow mighty oaks!

Likewise, how many small events, decisions and actions that you have taken have shaped the life you are currently living?

Make your mind up now to set small personal development goals and take action. The small actions you take now will have huge impact on your future. Imagine what huge actions could do for your personal development and your future life?

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The most important driving force of any successful and contended individual is his or her ‘vision statement’. And this statement can be made by the person at any point in life, by thinking and writing down what he/she thinks are important and priorities to life…on the personal front, family, work, friends and so on. On giving the values and priorities a considered thought, they shall be written down in the form of a ‘personal vision statement’ or ‘credo’.

Once this is done, this will be the beacon that will guide each and every action of the owner of the ‘vision statement’.

The time spent on making a ‘vision statement’ for yourself, will be worth more than its weight, not in gold, but the most expensive metal in the world. Just think of the fact that at every point and step in any facet of your life, you will be subconsciously guided by your ‘vision statement’ of which you and only YOU were the author.

Let me give a simple example of my own case. About a couple of years ago, on reading extensively about the value of personal written vision statements, I just spent about a day thinking of what my priorities in life would be, and what value systems would guide me on-course. Concluding the thought process, this was the ‘vision statement’ written down.

“…will be a successful man who will nurture his family with love and affection, provide them a better and comfortable future. He will embark on any step that will directly or indirectly contribute to this mission. He will live life with integrity, full of smiles, and radiate the same wherever and however he is. His career will be full of creative contribution to the positions he shall hold. He will become famous for his writings.”

Once I wrote this, and kept a few copies of it with me, I went through it time and again, probably for a few months. In hindsight, I can state emphatically that I have been guided by this ‘vision statement’ in all my deeds – be it at home, at the workplace, or anywhere and anything done, for that matter.

Think of what you want to do, what you want to accomplish, what will be your guiding values in each of your actions and steps…. And put down this, in the form of a concise vision statement.  This ‘vision statement’ can change and evolve, and be written and re-written time and again, by introspection.

Write your vision statement NOW. And see success and accomplishment in all you do…success and accomplishment as defined and set forth by you. Because that is what is your command to your mind, body and soul to act on consistently.

So today, and just now, please sit down and think of what should be your vision statement. Consult your parents, your spouse and kids if need be and make sure that you have a written vision statement before you retire for the day.

Make a few copies of your ‘vision’ statement, and leave it in places which you will see it often, may be 2 to 3 times a day. Carry a copy of that in your wallet. Make a public commitment – be it to your spouse, friends, and confidante about your vision.

The result of this easy and simple exercise will be there to see for the rest your life…and you/your family shall soak in nothing but accomplishments, happiness, satisfaction, success.

–

Muralidharan is an HR practitioner and a recruitment professional. A strong believer in spreading cheer and positivity, Murali currently works out of Chennai and is a voracious reader and a prolific writer.

The secret of success is known to both successful and unsuccessful.
Then why do we have to be told how to succeed?

By one and all?

Have you ever pondered and mulled over this aspect of life science?
I have.

The quote above was the reason to do so, as the word “volition” jumped out at me, years ago, when it was presented to me by a senior, through a very powerful presentation.

There I was referring to the dictionary to learn its meaning, later in the day.

The word had a good positive ring to it when it was pronounced emphatically so I had to know what it meant.

It turned out to mean…”will”…a very common word.

Here is what it literally means:

Volition: The mental faculty by which one deliberately chooses or decides. Will.

•    The act or an instance of making a conscious choice or decision.
•    A conscious choice or decision.
•    The power or faculty of choosing; the will.

Having now understood what it means, allow me ask you now three questions.

•    Did you have the volition to succeed when you did succeed?
•    Didn’t you have the volition to succeed when you did not succeed.
•    Finally, do you now have the volition to succeed?

If you do not dismay, as you know the secret…you may have been wary of it all this while, but now you will get to know, for sure.

As one thing is for sure…”The only thing that stands between you and success is you”.

Success has got ‘u’ built into it by default.

You have/had the volition within you always, maybe lying dormant within you…you need to stir it up consciously now and then.
That’s all.

Get to do that consciously and constantly.

From “Got to do it” mode…you need to get to “Get to do it” mode…now!
As it is always now or never.

Therefore to succeed, as a habit, do it now… As, nothing succeeds like success!

With a little bit of reverse engineering you will realize that life is all about choices and not chances.

It’s the choices you make that drive you to action, or for that matter, inaction too.

Inaction is akin to inviting peril. Inaction invariably is preceded by procrastination and callousness. Identify their onset as soon as you can and then…jettison them immediately.

Once done, come and join me to “Kick the tire and light the fire” of the engine of action.

Action is driving yourself in the direction of results, both positive as well as negative.

With results happening, you are on the path of progress…progressing from the rabbit path, to a muddy track, to a road, onto a highway leading to a taxi track reaching out to a runway…to take off!

From the dumbbell called confidence.
To succeed.

Succeed…and  then land…back again on this runway, or for that matter any other runway, anywhere in the world, once you are deft and confident at doing just that…again and again. On the wings of patience, perseverance and a positive attitude.

Through repetitive attempts, you will too.

Fly.

As “they can fly because they think they can” is another quote that I have lived with ever since I was 20. Without fear of getting grounded or for that matter stuck in a quick sand—or worse, back-tracking over the same old ground(s), over and over again.

Attempt is a temptation that you need to be tempted to attempt.
That’s a conscious choice you have to make.

Whenever I look back at all that I have done and achieved I have narrowed down to the choices I made that lead to success…to the degree I desired.

Nothing more nothing else.

When I decided to hang up my gloves, it was a conscious thought and a deliberated action on my part, as I had had enough of that success.

I knew what I was doing and was ready to face the consequences too.
I did too.
No regrets.

As, here I am addressing and sharing thoughts/experiences with all of you, to tickle you to succeed, and get wherever you decide to go after.
Who knows, whether I would have been able to do the same, as an active combat pilot, had I not hung my gloves?

Then.
I am loving it here…and that’s true success for me.

Hope this piece of my “thoughtscape” helps you define, design, align, and spur you into action(s) too, to succeed as a habit…so that you do get to where you need to…so that you do love it as much as I love what I am doing, now a days.

As I made a choice, once I got to know and understand the power of choice coupled with, the power of now!

That understanding finally led me to understand the process of success.
So please make the right choices…don’t hold back on them ever.
If you don’t choose, you tend to snooze and if you snooze…you get to lose.

Choose now…set your choices as your goals…write them down…and then do not forget to assign time lines to each and every choice you make…as time lines breathe life into those very nascent thoughts that will finally spur you into action

Thoughts lead to Actions.
Actions begin with choices.
Right choices reach you to right results.

Right results = success = wealth, power and happiness.
Success = steely resolve + firm commitment + rock like determination = Volition = will (will+power)

–

Arun alias Axee is an ex-combat pilot turned executive life coach. He is actively involved with Brian Tracy in a novel learning initiative, iLearningGlobal.biz/axee. Contact him at emarshalarun@gmail.com.

The challenges thrown at the entrepreneur are merely tests to ascertain the level to which s/he is capable of understanding his/her business: “Do your homework.”
If it’s a partnership you’re involved in, the VC needs to know if you can gel. The VC needs two areas covered in such a situation – “someone who can build and someone who can sell.”
On the flipside, the entrepreneur needs a number of things of his/her VC. Number one on an entrepreneur’s list of priorities is chemistry. The question must be asked: “Is this someone you can disagree with.” The VC must be the first person you are willing and able to call when you are struggling with a problem. You must be able to ask of the VC if future rounds of financing are safe. Are your operating values soon going to be seen by the VC as operating problems?  These and many other questions relating to compatibility or chemistry must first be answered before jumping to conclusions about how the relationship is going to work.
Secondly, what do you need? The stage in which your enterprise is in and the ability of the VC to understand future variations in revenues depending on the timeline of the business are vital.
There was plenty of debate regarding valuation and liquidation references, but the simple core of their advice was this:  create demand for the product, get people excited in it and you are in the driver’s seat, with the VC riding shotgun.
Of course businesses have different gestation periods depending on the models they use, but as long as you have found a VC who understands the machinations of the industry, there shouldn’t be a problem.
Questions were soon raised about the general fear of ideas being stolen. The panel was quick to retort that the only way to protect an idea is to run with it. Ideas are meaningless without execution. The cost of making and executing the idea must be less than what the customer is willing to pay. And naturally the scalability of the idea depends on the market for it.

Some VCs saw the coming year in an optimistic light drawing attention to the fact that this downturn will result in a lot of experimentation with new business models and constant innovation.
Essentially however the tone was Darwinian at best. “The bar is being raised”, “Survival of the fittest” and other such phrases were designed to assure entrepreneurs that funding would be available to those who adapted to changing situations.

Chairing the special panel discussion titled ‘From Adversity to Advantage: Opportunities for Growth & Investment’, Sonjoy Chatterjee, Executive Director, ICICI Bank suggested that the entrepreneurial ecosystem in India was finding sustenance despite the economic downturns. Atul Punj mentioned that this could also be opportunities for companies to make good acquisitions/investments as the price point of some of the companies would provide attractive upsides in the times to come. Hari Bhartia on the contrary mentioned that cash is king and companies must be conservative in spending cash and use Lean and Six Sigma techniques for process improvements.

In a session titled, “Are you ready for venture capital”, a star panel with varying expertise addressed issues relating both to the availability of capital and whether or not acquisition of that capital is a good idea.
Sudhir Sethi of IMD-IDG ventures that deals primarily with early stage enterprises, spoke about the question being how to expect the funding market to change. Sudhir Sethi is Founder, Chairman and Managing Director of IDG Ventures India, a US$150 million early-stage technology venture capital fund backed by IDG, the world’s largest IT-focused media company. He founded IDG Ventures in 2006 after 26 years in the technology and venture industry.

He classified this impact of uncertain capital markets under the following:

Fund-raising and general partner/team quality

Limited partners, he said, would become very selective as regards the quality of teams they bet on. Few general partners in India, he believes, possess a “full cycle GP experience of deal flow generation, investment, monitoring, exits, and fund raising”. In effect, first-time funds with teams that do not have much chemistry will hit road blocks raising capital. On the other hand, second time funds with a well-planned investment strategy and a “full cycle venture experience”, will find it easier (in terms of adaptability to the market) to gain funds.

Deal flow

Panellists expected a slowdown in deal flow. Start-up venture funding saw a decline, as the number of newer start-ups fell. There appears to be a slowdown in entrepreneurial movement from corporate to start-ups. Expectations abound, in an optimistic VC atmosphere, for the quality of deals to grow.
Tier-two cities such as Pune, Coimbatore & Mysore may also see a piece of  the action in terms of deal flow.

Valuations

Sethi also mentioned having seen falling valuations in deals with early stage ventures. This trend will probably continue.

Exits

Dependence on IPOs will continue to fall as companies are being constructed increasingly to exit by acquisition. Founding teams may be pushed to build significantly tech differentiated models so as to harness greater valuations at exit.

Co-investments

Yet another impact of unstable capital markets discussed at the summit was the increase in co-investments. Sethi quoted the example of his own IMD-IDG ventures where out of 7 investments, 4 are together with co-investors.

–

Some challenges that the industry may face in the near future were addressed. The Venture industry will be seen in the next 4 years to be one where opportunity management is vital.

The industry is however currently strong and flexible enough to support more funds. This was evidenced by fact that IMD-IDG met numerous limited partners who communicated the intention for IMD to continue to focus on venture investments. The difference between first time and second time funds in the near future would be the latter’s ability to raise funds easier and faster.
There appears also to be a healthy trend in terms of greater numbers of disruptive product ventures.
Another big challenge however is that of maintaining the teams they have gathered while private equity firms are cropping up.

Venture funds will face a challenge of retaining their teams with more private
equity funds being formed.

Clearly, there is much to be considered in the coming year. Funding will be scarcer than ever and survival of the fittest will function in its bluntest form.
That is not to say that VCs are now a completely excluding mechanism. If you’ve got the idea, the passion and the vision, coupled with effective execution, funding should not be a problem.

A grand event at the Hotel Lalit Ashok in Bangalore, the TiE Summit brought together leaders in business and budding men and women entrepreneurs eager to switch cards with the big guns.
The speakers covered numerous topics bringing forward solid, practical advice to all present.
Basic questions were asked leading to much discussion that revealed to a great extent, the bare fundamentals of business, and the secrets to success in the field.
Speakers were flown in from all over the corporate world to share their insights with an enthusiastic congregation.

Most points were however prefaced by the doom & gloom of the world economy.
Although there was some talk about this not being the “ideal” time to enterprise, this was quickly followed up by a core fundamental: If you’ve got a great idea, great enthusiasm and great persistence, the struggle for funding will be insignificant.

Innovation was a topic of much discussion. Martin Kleem, the keynote speaker of the second day of the summit, gave his path to innovative success. He introduced the one greatest source of invention as the violation of “Unquestioned Mindsets”. The unquestioned mindsets of the accounting software industry in 1991 were that more features were always better than fewer and that double entry accounting (credits and debits) was the sole supreme market need.
Quickbooks, Scott Cook’s  product had half the features of its competitors, was twice the price, was an unknown brand, had bugs in the software and within 1 month of its launch had 70% of market share.
This shocking success was a result of a change in mindset or rather a challenge to the established mindset.
As Prof. Theresa Amabile put it, “Entrepreneurship is finding and seizing opportunities that others miss.”
Quickbooks saw a large untapped opportunity in marketing simple uncomplicated accounting software. They noticed that many small businesses functioned much like a family where one of the partners took care of the finances without any real accounting qualifications. They needed a simple mechanism to maintain accounts.

How did Scott Cook notice this market and keep it? He “went there and saw”. Scott and his team went to the offices of local businesses, met with the “accountants” to figure out what they were missing. He solved “big customer problems”. And the “delight” that it brought customers was Quicbook’s marketing.

Operating values were a major theme at the summit that almost every speaker addressed. It starts with the employees. Give them a great place to work. They are the driving force of business, the one factor you can count on to give you more, if you give them more. Then come the customers. Give them better ways to live, making life simpler. Both these operating values need a quality that many expounded on: Empathy.
An old Indian proverb was quoted: “Empathy is not just about walking in someone else’s shoes. First you must remove your own.”
The key to being an entrepreneur is the ability to adapt. This was intricately tied in with empathy. The skill to change
Another key operating value that was noted by Mr. Raj Jaswa, President TiE Silicon Valley, was the fact that as an entrepreneur you can write your own rules. You don’t need to follow any rules, not even the values that seemed to have worked for these entrepreneurs. Only when you develop your own values will success follow, says Mr. Jaswa. Mr.Jaswa also recommends that budding entrepreneurs or those who are planning to upscale their businesses must first position themselves in such a manner as to first scale themselves and their skills up to size.
Top class management material available online was suggested. For example, the Million Dollar Club of Insurance Salespeople is said to be chock full of valuable information available online. Remember says Mr. Jaswa, “The company grows after you do.”
K. Ganesh, IIM graduate who founded and heads TutorVista spoke about his own operating values as well. The most inspiring story I heard at the summit as far as garnering venture capital is concerned was Mr.Ganesh’s value creation from $500,000 to $65 Million with no venture capital.
He prescribed a few questions that must be asked before starting to enterprise –
1.    To start or not to start – ask yourself “Why do it at all?”
2.    External capital or bootstrapping
Base this decision on
•    Capital needed to break even
•    Your own risk appetite
•    Non-financial benefits of VC Capital specific to your sector
3.    Profitability vs. scalability
4.    Built to last vs. built to flip
5.    Identify/ealuate greenfield opportunities

Innovation is key, says Mr.Ganesh. Be a pioneer and look for opportunities for a scalable business. Do not try and have a head on conflict with the big players.  His golden advice: Be prepared. Plan for every event.

Will Basil, CEO and founder of FabIndia spoke about the importance of the team.
He expounded on the theory of the “third dimension” in decision making.
“Future business books will be written about the third dimension”, he said.
When building a team, Basil says, it is important to include people with diametrically opposite means of thinking. When this happens and a conflict is seen between the two dimensions, a third dimension, one of a combination of ideas, arises. Again the primary operating value of FabIndia was, “Never bullshit the customer because sooner or later, you know, they can smell the bullshit”.

The retail sector was also a topic of much discussion. The sector was said to be young and the media was blamed for creating a perceptive lull in consumer spending. Mr. Arvind Singhal, Chairman Technopark Advisers, was clear about his thoughts stating that there was “no indication”, that consumer spending had fallen or that consumption was stressed. In absolute terms, he said, consumption would grow at 15%.
The main takeaway from this session was this: A retailer at this stage must not compromise on spending on the customer, because when we come out of this “perceptive” slump, you will have a large and loyal market share. While your competitors were cutting costs with the customer, you stood your ground.
Another important point for retailers – short-circuit the supply chain because cutting supply chain costs reduces the risk of losing customers.
A counterpoint to this suggestion was the fact that this required investment and that this is not necessarily economical at this point in time. It was argued that it would be easier to bring in discipline.
During the growth phase that we enjoyed, retail became prosperous and in effect inefficient. It “gathered flab”. In that regard, the slowdown was well-timed for this sector. There also appears to be a lot of opportunity at the lower end of the retail market with new formats, models, systems and markets.
In conclusion, do not make changes in consumer propositions – keep with it. Do not short-change the customer.

The BPO sector was another topic of great focus. After a barrage of statistics, Mr. Raman Roy concluded that there was still a massive market to be outsourced in the form of companies that were beyond Fortune 1000. Small & medium enterprises represent a large chunk of business that can be outsourced. He called it, “Moving away from dozens of companies worth millions to millions of companies worth dozens.”
Where is the industry? We are still growing at 7% which is a tremendous figure given the state of Europe and the US. Our industry is deep in terms of the number of companies. And our industry is tremendously flexible having gone through numerous downturns in the past and having come out much stronger.
We will see an experimentation with new business models and constant innovation as the industry manoeuvres itself into a revival.
The future however, appears harder to predict. The panel did predict though that the industry for the most part would have a bright future, given its depth.          Getting together at TiE to discuss the future of entrepreneurship provided 1700 budding and experienced entrepreneurs with an opportunity to share ideas, create opportunities and network.

There was a lot of disagreement among panelists at the summit, but there was one sole point that all could agree on.
We are in a remarkable period of economic history with very low visibility where finding funding will be difficult, but if you have the model and the passion, never let the entrepreneurial spirit die.
Those who succeed now, will be judged by history as true “economic warriors” of the 21st century, who fought with the weapons of prosperity.

This progress towards achievement of our goals is made easier by the power of imaging in the mind – once the image of the outcome is fed continuously to the mind, it is only a matter of time before the goal turns into reality. Imaging is the most potent tool of the mind, to achieve anything in life.

Here is a simple illustration of imaging in getting to goals. Just think of something which each one us had vividly visualized and it came to existence after sometime – in some cases just a few days, and sometimes after longer time – things like your parents being with you when you got that university topper gold medal, or getting wedded to a spouse who has the name you liked the most, or you became the head of your division. Actually, in a corner of your mind, that image kept lingering unconsciously, and it led to the outcome. In fact how fast the image came to be true in existence is directly linked to the intensity and power with which we had done the imaging exercise. For sure, all of us will have at least a couple of events or instances, wherein powerful imaging came into reality, without seemingly much effort.  That goes to show how powerful imaging can be, and just think of what we could aspire for if we chose to use imaging consciously in our desire to make it big.

Use the power of imaging in the mind in anything you want to do – visualize yourself as someone looking fit and 10 kgs lesser, commit the same to paper, and read the same about five times a day, and you will naturally act to do whatever is needed to look like that. This is just an easy example; your goal can be anything you always wanted.

It may seem complex and arduous but reaching goals is so simple when you passionately image and visualize the outcome of what you intend to achieve. This power of imaging combined with the power of having the goals as a written statement in your wallet, propels and catalyses your journey to achieving what you never could have thought possible.

Creating and recreating the winning images in the mind will seem tough only initially. But that comes with practice and exercise. As they say in any success literature, there an average of about 60000 thoughts per day that come into the mind. So the moment we write down about 10 or 20 life goals, and begin imaging the outcome in the mind, the mind is tutored and trained to focus on these goals. It gets into the subconscious mind, and moving or working towards achievement of the goals becomes a 24/7 process and the dynamics of action towards goals gets embedded in the subconscious mind.

These exercises of the mind make getting to goals great fun and easy too. The minute the mind is exercised and stretched it does not rest until the moment the image that is fed to it becomes a reality in life.

Good looks, great knowledge in any subject, getting into your dream company, becoming a CEO…be it anything, you become the CEO of your life by harnessing the power of imaging and getting to goals.

–

Muralidharan is an HR practitioner and a recruitment professional. A strong believer in spreading cheer and positivity, Murali currently works out of Chennai and is a voracious reader and a prolific writer.

Several years ago, prior to working for Herzing College, I worked for the Technical College system and received a call one summer day in 2002 from an elderly lady. Strikingly crass and grumpy she had called to find out about computer classes that were available at the community center I managed in northern Wisconsin for her grandson who had just graduated from high school. I gave her my sales pitch, got her address, sent her some information and honestly didn’t give it another thought.

A couple of weeks later I was at the center and one of my instructors came into the classroom I was puttering around in and said “There is someone here to see you”. I thought it odd as no one really even knew I was at the center, not even my staff, I just happened to stop in. I went on into the waiting area to find a little old lady sitting next to a young kid. I said “Hi” and at the moment she opened her mouth I knew EXACTLY who she was. She just had a bigger than life, in your face personality; she was a fighter. We started to talk about the classes and signing her grandson Robbie up. She went on to tell me that Robbie would need more time than others to complete the class, the classes were self paced so it really didn’t matter but she was adamant that I make sure the instructors knew he would need more time.

This whole time we chatted, Robbie sat in total silence with his hands on his lap, looking down at the table; she demanded so much of my attention that I hadn’t even looked at him. After telling me yet again that Robbie would need extra time, she reached under the table and grabbed his hand, bringing it to the surface and harshly dropping it on the table saying “SEE” and pointing to his hand. My mouth dropped or at least it felt like it did. Robbie had no hands. Not hands like you and I have. He suffers from Aperts Syndrome – http://www.emedicine.com/ped/topic122.htm – and basically has three large digits on each hand the size that are about the thickness and size of four of my fingers combined.  People suffering from Aperts also don’t have any joints or ability to bend like your fingers or my fingers. Upon seeing Robbie’s hands I immediately went into counselor mode, telling them about our special needs department, tutors, etc. Robbie’s grandmother wanted nothing to do with it; she just wanted Robbie in the class and some extra time.

Giving into her demands, it came time to decide which class to enroll Robbie in. I suggested that we start with a basic Windows class, to get acclimated to the computer, how it works, etc. But no, Robbie wanted to be in Excel, he wanted to learn Excel. There was no arguing with his grandmother (I tried) so I took her $70.55 in tuition, had them fill out a registration form and told Robbie I would see him on the first night of class and that I would bring his textbook with me to class.

The first night of class

Robbie and grandmother showed up on time, grandma left telling Rob that she would be back in two hours to pick him up.

I gave Robbie his book.

He could not remove the plastic shrink wrap from the book.

I thought, “There is no way this kid is going to finish this course.”

I removed the plastic from Robbie’s book for him.

Robbie then couldn’t put his book in the book stand next to the computer and asked me for help.

I put his book in the bookstand and I thought, “There is no way this kid is going to finish this course.”

I pulled the instructor aside and asked her to watch Robbie, and to let me know the minute he needed help. I assumed that there was no way Robbie would be successful in the course.

Three days passed and I had not heard from the instructor. So I called her and asked, “How Robbie do?”

“He did fine.”

Robbie did more than fine

Robbie finished Excel in pace with the other students and got an A. Robbie then went on to take eight additional computer classes to earn a MS Software Certificate, straight A’s, except for Access Part 2, he got a B in that one. It took Rob two years to finish nine classes, one by one. Showing up for class like clockwork in between horrible surgeries where they were putting metal plates and screws in his head to fix bone deformities, Rob kept plugging along. Taking a break here and there because his grandma could not afford to pay for the class or the book; waiting while she saved up enough of their social security incomes to move forward. Mysteriously a “free” or “donated” book always seemed to be available for Robbie, they just happen to be lying about. It’s funny how things work out like that.

Robbie was a joy, always had a hug waiting for me. Smart, so smart and shiny so very, very shiny, a simply beautiful person behind an unfortunate shell. Smiling through everything life dealt him and overcoming any hurdle he set his mind to. His grandmother despite her tough exterior was a sweet lady too; a heart of gold, having to be tough to get things done for the grandson she had raised since birth.  She too always had a hug for me.  My education was found in those hugs.

After completing the Software Certificate, Robbie decided to pursue a Web Page Design Certificate that required a MAC computer and required that his 76 year old grandmother drive him 2.5 hours one way, twice a week for the classes. I put a MAC at the center and gave him a key to the building so he could come whenever he needed to do his homework (they couldn’t afford to buy one), DVR paid for his grandmother’s mileage removing one barrier to his education and Robbie started once again, taking one class at a time.

The hands of a person with Aperts syndrome

No boundaries for Robbie

The Green Bay Press Gazette was looking to the college for stories so I asked Robbie if he would like to tell his story and he did. One day the phone rang and an elderly lady told me the newspaper had given her my phone number and asked me for Robbie’s address. Because of privacy issues I couldn’t give out that information so I asked her why. She went on to say that she had saved up $2000 for a new computer but after reading Robbie’s story in the paper had decided that he needed it more than she did and she wanted to send him a check. She did.  Others did too.  The community rallied around Robbie; community is a beautiful thing.

When I left the college, Rob was working on finishing the Web Page certificate and planned on starting a business working from home building web pages. There is no doubt that he will reach the goal that he has set for himself. Robbie can do anything.  Robbie can be anything.

A picture of Robbie hangs above my desk, next to pictures of my kids. He taught me to never assume that someone “can’t” and that no matter who you are if you set your mind to something you can do it. One of the most valuable life lessons I’ve learned in my 37 years. There are no excuses to not see your goals come true, no matter what hurdles you face, be they physical, limitations thrust upon you by others or your own internal walls. The only true limitations we have are the ones we put on ourselves.

So now when a student calls and complains about trying to balance work and family and school or about some other hurdle they might be facing, I tell them about the boy with no hands who can navigate any computer you put in front of him and then I tell them to take “can’t” out of their vocabulary.  The lessons learned from Robbie and his grandmother will stay with me forever and have shaped the person I’ve become; especially when it comes to dreaming big, setting goals and seizing the future.

So dear friends, alumni, students and anyone else reading this…“You can. Yes you can.”  The journey to your goal won’t be completed in a day, but step by step, course by course, student by student, sale by sale, job by job, degree by degree, goal by goal or choice by choice.  Looking down the road at the path you traveled once you’ve reached your goal is a priceless gift that you can only earn; it isn’t handed to you, nor is the guarantee that it will be easy.

Reflection brings me to thinking about my next goal. There are a few.  Helping Herzing College be the best when it comes to providing career services, education and opportunity, keeping my staff happy and growing in their positions, watching my kids develop into young adults, continuing my own education and spreading Robbie’s  message, “yes you can” hoping to empower anyone who has doubts about themselves.

–

Amy is the Director of Career Services at Herzing College Online and teaches career development courses for the online campus.  Residing in Milwaukee, WI she does volunteer work for several non-profit organizations and enjoys giving back to her community.

(If you have a “yes I can” story, please do share with us at Tickled by Life.)

To achieve anything noteworthy in life calls for a certain amount of “stretch” which put plainly means that one has to “struggle” with the performance and delivery of results that meet higher standards than those in play. I would rather call this a raising of the bar or an aspiration in action. Performing within our capabilities guarantees delivery against promises made, but these are mediocre performances delivering mediocre goals. Satisfaction with this leads to a dull sense of happy mediocrity and diminished dreams.

At Valmar International, we have put together our own definition of success in our Vision Statement, drawing from all those lessons others have learned and shared and our own experiences and aspirations for success. Allow me to share this with you, as we have found these simple truths of life very useful.

We look at adopting these tenets of life as we A-S-P-I-R-E for success learning six shining lessons of life

A: Accountability for results

Ownership of the task along with responsibility for performance is a prime element of success. Effort no matter how earnest, without focus or direction cannot deliver excellence. “If it has to be, it’s up to me!” is a common enough phrase, but we need to get it off the page and into our work ethic. Desire without a will, subscription to excellence without action, and action without accountability together deliver shallow performances and empty dreams.

The first lesson here is “Make your life count when you put your signature to it.”

S: Strength and stability of values

The guide-ropes across life are woven with the values we bring along with us. Values will hold us accountable not just for what we do, but how we do things too. Values contribute to a life with honor and morality. Values provide the higher ground, on which we can breathe the purity of the air of accomplishment, instead of suffocating in the sulphuric swamps of dishonorable practices.
Good corporate governance at the organizational level and personal ethics at the individual level can help create a single transparent and honest agenda of action.

Not having to watch your back or cover your rear while you are engaged in delivering excellence, is a major relief and allows everyone to commit resources without any reservation. Standing firm on what you believe in allows you to advocate your position and interest soundly. It’s not about being obstinate, but about being definite.

The second lesson is “Stamp goodness on the charter of life in whatever you do. Seal life’s envelope with greatness and leave pettiness penniless.”

P: Passion and purpose in performance

Consider this. You visit a well promoted township and see towers, buildings, parks, restaurants, shopping malls, schools, hospitals and all that makes a township strewn across the landscape with no apparent design or town planning. You further notice that many of the structures were only partially complete, some surrounded by dense bush and overgrown wasteland whilst some with pruned lawns. Roads run smartly through the town but some abruptly end in rough mounds of rubble. Restaurants run glitzy advertisements of their fare and entertainment programs, but this is only in print and not in practice. Hospitals gleam with the most professional equipment but the medical services are run by its lone pharmacy dispensing OTC medicines. You quiz some of the townsfolk about these strange to bizarre matters, and find that they do not sense anything amiss!!

Do we recognize our lives in this context too?  How often do we really plan the township of our life? Giving in to the flavour of the moment we may develop competences that die faster than they are used, redirect our focus mindlessly into convoluted and often unfinished paths, build towers of performance without the support structure in place, leave the “insignificant balance” of competence, performance, values and relationships unfinished or half constructed for completion at an unknown later date. But all this has a sense of tremendous busyness and activity, leaving us feeling we have accomplished things! As we go along we make do with what we have and this makes major withdrawals from our energy and enthusiasm bank balances, till we resign ourselves to living with inconvenience and a poverty-stricken future.

Bringing passion and purpose to performance allows us to create the right architecture and platform for our dreams to rise to celebrate a rich and rewarding present and a promising future.

The third lesson is “Blueprint your life with clear purpose and embed your soul in the achiever’s hallowed hall of fame.”

I: Integrity of intent

Integrity is like a precious stone. A flaw in the stone will not only devalue the stone but also may cause problems for the wearer. Interestingly enough integrity begins with “I” which means that it lies within us to manifest. The completeness or wholeness of the purpose we bring to our performance and relationships as well as the truthfulness and honesty of our intentions, allow us to shed the disguises and garbs of “strategic” intent which is usually opportunistic in favour of  an upstanding unconditional largeness of intent which enlarges the playing field to accommodate others too.

Amidst the fog of deviousness, manipulation and exploitation, integrity of intent is a clear beacon which illuminates the entire relationship with the purity of true partnership in progress.

The fourth lesson is “Be of global intent and design. Leave parched parochialism to wither and die in the sunshine of abundance.”

R: Reliability in relationships

The word relationship itself shows us that just like a ship, all hands must be on the deck and the ship of relation needs the synergy of all members to pull together, especially in rough weather. This applies to teams and associates at the organizational level or families and friends at the individual or personal level. Navigating the storms and tempests of suspicion, doubt, misgivings, moments of weakness, inadequacies and incompetence, can take a severe toll on the most weather-beaten of sailors afloat on the sea of survival and success.

Establishing a resourceful relationship which counts on the contribution of all elements in the network of life, trusting and respecting those in the network and staying with the ship provides the robustness to the relationship. Investing in the relationship unconditionally by contributing first without calculating the returns, and living all the tenets we have described this far, creates the reliability needed to put wind in the sails.

It is all about being there when it matters. Finding the right role to play and a set of convergent goals to guide individual contributions to the relationship are crucial for one to deliver at least what is expected.

The fifth lesson is “Run a 24×7 relationship with your resources. Burn your leave card.”

E: Excellence as a way of life

Making excellence a way of life, means demolishing the middle class of mediocrity and aspiring for the “dance of delight”. Life at the cutting edge of excellence, cannot possibly be played by performing with competences one is conscious of possessing. Instead the thrill and exuberance of a full-blown life comes from reaching higher than the “essential expected” and delivering at the very “pinnacle of performance”. It’s all about asking yourself if what you do is enough or can you go the extra mile.

Pulling performances from the slums of mediocrity can be one of the most rewarding and thrilling experiences one can have. Like an eagle, once you experience the heavens, it is hard to live below the clouds. Finding refuge in being “grounded” or “down to earth” or “in touch with reality” leads to exactly that in the rewards. You are grounded in the earth, immersed in a false sense of security of a rationalized reality instead of soaring to embrace the universe.

The sixth lesson is “Live life at full stretch benchmarking beyond the best.”

With these six lessons of life may you fulfill your dreams and ASPIRE actively for all the success that the world can possibly offer.

–
Dexter J Valles, business and life trainer renowned for his programs under the “At the Steering Wheel of Life” and “Winning Edge” banners, is CEO of Valmer International, a Mumbai-based management consultancy. Contact him at www.valmarinternational.com or http://valmar.page.tl

One needs to be abreast of new inventions and discoveries, which can help in this direction. Videoconferencing can eliminate stressful travelling. But travel sometimes, has its own admirable points like discovering new things or places or even being able to catch up on your reading during train or air journeys.

It is a good idea to begin and end your day with a prayer. I invariably do one non-Sikh religious reading like on Christianity or Jainism or Buddhism or Islam or Geeta every day, apart from the Granth Sahib. In the night before sleeping as well as in the morning before starting the day,  some positive and thankful reading is a must. It really sways your thoughts. Some people do some meditation. Anything which helps you to become more efficient and a better person and encourages you to live in the present moment should be welcomed. The idea is, to do your best in your work. Always try to think positive, as positive vibes make you feel good about yourself and the world. Being positive radiates positive energy to others including people hostile to you. Have a target to make one person happy and smiling every day.

Focus all your energies on working hard and in achieving whatever you have set out to achieve. It will be a very satisfying experience. Your efforts should be to stay healthy as health is basic to all achievements. A healthy body will enable you to work harder and for longer hours. It will make you feel more confident and change you for the better. Have a programme of staying healthy by incorporating exercising in your life. Never sacrifice your exercising regimen. I get visitors quite often and some of them turn up when I am just going for exercise. I invite them to join me and discuss whatever they want to say during the exercising and walking session. As most people are out of shape, they drop off soon by cutting short their conversation, which would have gone on interminably otherwise.

There are others, who meet me at functions or programmes or even during the exercise and tell me that they want to come to my place to discuss a few things. I do not put them off discourteously, but tell them to discuss whatever they want straightaway. This saves me from listening to their litany of grievances later on.

Having a friendly disposition makes life pleasant and gives you a feeling of being on top of the world. Stay relaxed and do let your hair down. Do anything which makes you feel good whether it is partying, reading books, meditating or seeing films. With this approach you will feel refreshed and energised.

We need to strive for continuous improvement in every walk of our life, be it professional, social or personal. Most of the time people are rigid about their methods of working, living, socialising and even meeting others. A friend’s wife insisted on bathing her one old year baby with cold water in severe cold in December in Delhi on the ground that it is healthy to bathe with cold water. She continued doing this till her baby caught pneumonia and was on death bed. Only after a lot of arguments by her parents and her husband, she realised that it was not necessary to punish the baby with ice cold water in winter. It was her fixed mindset which almost killed her baby, who survived due to the intervention of his grand parents.

Once I was posted in an office, where I found that I could not dictate my letters to anybody as nobody knew stenography or typing. Any expectation that they would be typed correctly and accurately was out of question.

Conventional, conservative and fixed ideas lay down expectations that in Government offices all typing work should be done by the typist or secretary or your stenographer. It was not applicable in the present context. So instead of sticking with such a person, I insisted on his transfer and got it done from another person. The substitute was so good that I had him transferred with me and he spent a large chunk his service with me as my private secretary. At his advice, I learnt typing when still in service. As the typing keyboards of the computer and the typewriter are similar, the transition has been easy and very convenient. This knowledge and skill has resulted in my having written 29 books and in honing my writing skill.

I am convinced that if we do not keep on learning throughout our lives, we are left behind. Whenever I am faced with a problem, I think of how I can solve it and not how it cannot be done. Making excuses for not doing anything and everything is the easiest thing. What matters is doing by questioning the existing theories and practices.

This is the difference between pessimist and others. The pessimist will give all kinds of reasons and excuses as to why something cannot be done instead of getting into the arena and doing it. I reason that it is better to try and get wrong results than not to try at all. Trying something is vital and is the first step in getting any outcome. Undoubtedly, better ways will be found as we go along. We should not put off doing, under the excuse that we are doing only 50 or 75% correctly. Starting itself will help you get past the ‘stuck-up’ point. We can always rectify or adjust as we go along the way.

If you discover that you have made a mistake, correct it right away.  Accept that mistakes are a part of life and they happen. Do what the pilots do when flying aeroplane. Though they put their planes on auto pilot, they keep on constantly adjusting so that the plane lands at its intended destination. It is equally true of our lives and self-improvement. The path to the progress and self-development is not always straight. It requires corrections from time to time. It lies in our power to do it.

–

Joginder Singh had a distinguished career as an Indian Police Service Officer and retired as the head of India’s top investigating agency CBI. He is a prolific writer, having published 29 books including translated versions.

Often we do not try for fear of losing, but even if we lose, aren’t we winning? Winning experience, winning friends, and winning sympathy.

“Oh you were good !” “Hard luck, but there is always a next time.” “The judges were partial, I liked what you said.”

These are the words I have so often heard, naturally, after losing contests. And what has it got me… plenty of friends.

I was a teenager, when I first stepped in for a state-level speaking contest, with shaking feet and sweaty palms, and I asked my mentor and sounding board, “Do you think I should participate, uncle?”

His answer was simple, “What have you got to lose?” and that was that. Sure enough I lost the contest, well actually came a second, but lost the first place all the same. But I had won!

Overnight, I was the queen of the college with my picture in the papers, acknowledgements and smiles from passers-by, and a lot of applause wherever I went. I had gained popularity and I had gained friends. But the best part of all, I had gained experience. After that there was no looking back. Needless to say, I had gained confidence. The winning streak continues still.

People usually ask me, “What if we do not win?”

My answer is simple. You guessed it, “What have you got to lose?”

If you think you are losing your face or reputation by losing a contest, admit the fact that you were not good enough in the first place. The problem is that we are looking at our loss so subjectively  that we do not look at anything else. Not even at what we have gained due to the loss. We keep staring at the closed door instead of looking at the new windows that are opening for us.

“How do you do it?” people often ask me. Well it’s as simple as 1, 2, 3.

1.    Think laterally.
2.    Think without boundaries and limitations.
3.    Think of what you are going to gain.

We have to find what works for us, and what we can improve about ourselves. The secret behind converting a loss into a win is what we gain out of the experience.

A famous doha reads:

“Jin dhoondha tin pahiya, gehre paani paithi
Main bhapura duban dara, raha kinare baithi.”

Which means, “Those who strive, conquer by jumping into the waters, and I, scared of drowning, sit at the shore empty-handed.”

Every day is a new beginning. Go on, give yourself another chance. In life there are no guarantees. Do we stop picking roses because a thorn could prick us? Do we stop walking because we might fall? Do we stop swimming, because we might drown? Do we stop driving, for fear of having an accident? Do we stop trying just for fear of failing?

Then why do we stop believing in ourselves? Why do we stop taking more chances? Why do we stop participating in contests or experimenting in life?

Find the technique that works for you. What have you got to lose?

–

Dr.Arora is a freelance corporate trainer, Reiki master, feng shui consultant and aromatherapist. A periodontist by education, a Toastmaster by passion, she has been actively associated with radio, theatre and fine arts. Visit her websites www.mentalsparks.com and www.camelliastory.com.

Enthusiasm, dedication and charisma are some of the more important characteristics of leadership. Leaders are seen as good and evil and take on many personalities and roles, from managers or coaches to world leaders. It is believed that every leader possesses charisma and brings change and success. Thus leadership begins with vision, concern and mentorship.

There are ten important themes that help leadership. It is my belief that by not adhering to the ten traits, leaders not only fail but bring chaos to organization.

L = Listening

Good listening is required in order to understand employee attitudes and motivators. Get to know your employees by asking a lot of open-ended questions. When you ask questions, you have a chance to listen, and when you listen, you begin to better understand employee motivations, body language and issues. Get them to speak of issues that confront them and enable them to find solutions. Offer challenges to corporate issues with solutions. And, provide credit to the employee with a solid reply.

E = Enthusiasm

Employees want to be motivated. This begins with positive energy and positive commitment. Your personal ills and corporate pressures are unimportant to your employees. They are concerned about them. In good times and bad you must always express a positive and energetic attitude. Finish line energy gets finish line results.

A = Awareness

Be aware of issues that are non-verbal. Leaders must have keen sense that denote when employees are happy, frustrated, tired or overwhelmed. You must sense the issue and eliminate it quickly so that you keep organizational harmony.

D = Decisive

Employees loathe procrastinators! They want quick, decisive and meaningful replies. Leaders do not ponder, they make quick decisions to difficult problems and find immediate solutions.

E = Equal

The cliché “equal pay, for equal treatment” is so true. Leaders do not treat employees based on title, age, race, religion. Leaders understand that “everyone” and “anywhere” in the organization is equal. Leaders go by the principle that the sum of the parts is greater than the whole.

R = Reward

Adults desire more than just money with work. They desire recognition, and kudos for a job well done. However, in today’s marketplace, employees although happy, are looking for more contentment from their current job. This sense of pride and self-worth is a large issue for most people.

If people feel that they make a difference, they will care about organizational objectives, if not, apathy emerges. In sum, the job affects the person and the person affects the job. So what can be accomplished to gain a better sense of company pride and loyalty? Establish a reward system and watch the attitudes soar!

S = Success

Leaders understand the reasons of having corporate and divisional mission and vision statements. These statements of purpose enable employees to understand, 1) Who the firm is, 2) Where they are going? and 3) How they will get there. True leaders establish missions as a roadmap to future success.

H = Hypocrite

Leaders make decisions and stick with them. Leaders understand that reversing decisions make them a hypocrite. Further leaders take action when they offer action. For example, if a leader decides employees need training, he or she too takes the training. If a leader decides pay cuts are necessary to preserve profits they too take a cut. Leading by example creates a happier employee core and loyalty; contradicting the efforts creates dispassion, disbelief and attrition.

I = Isolate

Leaders believe in team work and team play. Every employee counts toward the bottom line. Leaders do not isolate themselves from the team and do no isolate the team from each other. As the saying goes, “There is no “I” in team”

P = Positive communication

In good times and in bad leaders create positive communication and feedback to employees. Positive and meaningful communication creates loyalty and mutual exchange of ideas and attitudes. When ideas are fresh and positive, profits and productivity soar!

The leader of tomorrow is changing from the top down style of management to a collegial approach where all become counterparts. Working together creates brings productivity that both sides seek. Leaders who have created this style of management have names on the front door such as Cisco, UPS, Home Depot, Lowes, Wal-Mart, et al. These leaders are change agents and strive to become not only recognized brand names but also recognized leaders. Employ the ten leadership traits, enculturate these in your organization and watch productivity grow.

–

Drew Stevens is a business growth expert. He speaks and consults around the world for organizations that require expertise in leadership and marketing. Visit Drew at www.drewstevensconsulting.com/freestuff and get hundreds of dollars in FREE selling tips.

If there is one quality that makes people win and achieve, it is not the amount of knowledge or being excellent in what you do, but it is just about the ability to persevere in the task on hand.

And why is it so difficult to persevere?

Because of the wandering mind. Read any success literature, and they will tell us that the human brain – that mass in the head which drives us in all of our actions and inactions – jumps at over 60000 thoughts a day. An uncontrolled and untamed mind is a wandering generalist. When we persevere, we make it a commander for a single purpose. You give the mind the reason and purpose in unambiguous terms, and then an image of the outcome; you make it the commander for a goal or a purpose.

Only by keeping this intensely active nature of the human mind, is it possible to accomplish success. And this is made possible by putting down the goals to paper, in black and white, with clear timelines and the outcome expected.

Unless you put down the most important needs and tasks in writing, the mind does wander. The minute you write down what is important to your personal and professional growth or life or work, the mind accepts the command at the subconscious level, and immediately drives you to persevere.

Perseverance, thus, is a quality that you can train the mind and body in by your own goal driven actions. By putting it down in writing, you are committing yourself to achieving whatever you want. Perseverance becomes a logical fallout of our need to get to the outcome desired.

Don’t miss the point…. gaining a new skill or improving on the job and climbing in the corporate ladder are all things that may not be such a huge challenge; the humongous challenge is to tune and drill the mind and body to persevere…and once done in a few small or big tasks, the ability to persevere gets embedded as a habit.

Link achieving the goal to pleasure and not doing the same to pain, maybe unbearable pain. When done so, Perseverance comes just naturally, and over a brief period of time, it becomes a winning habit. Most success literatures put this time frame for practice at 21 days.

Associate the ability to persevere or willingness to stay put on the task at hand to being in a pleasurable state of mind and body…and the opposite…not persevering or not focusing on the task as something that is unbearable pain

That moment there would be a paradigm shift in what the mind instructs the body to do. Persevere, experience immense pleasure and achieve goals.

–

Muralidharan is an HR practitioner and a recruitment professional. A strong believer in spreading cheer and positivity, Murali currently works out of Chennai and is a voracious reader and a prolific writer.

In our world today, it seems that one thing that is fully certain is change.  The speed of transformation that our business world is seeing – the rapid growth of technology, the ever changing needs of consumers, the needs of our families, the continued demands of our bosses and competitors, and the unending wish lists of our valued customers – does confirm that change is critical.

Many of us have the habit of resisting change. If at all possible we would rather avoid or pass on any change and maintain the status quo. There are some who are always looking for a change in the way their home or office is set up or in the way they conduct themselves. However, most people prefer being “settled” and feel uncomfortable at the thought of change.

In the days ahead, with the accelerated ecological imbalance that humanity has created in our environment, there is a definite pending change in the universe. One small example of such is that Delhi marked December 2008 as its warmest winter since 1953. The many reports of climate changes, the erosion of forests and lack of rainfall is a sad change that we are inviting upon ourselves.

Recently I met a senior level bank manager from Andhra Bank. The manager was explaining how difficult it is to get the staff members within the public sector in India to change and move on with the new demands of our time. The competition from the private sector is ruthless, but some public sector employees still remain relaxed and reluctant to make any positive progress or change at all.

Because change is inevitable, it is best to prepare for it. Change can be a painful process at times. It requires saying goodbye to old processes and adapting to the new, which at times may be strange. A principle and attitude to adopt in times like these: Let us change for the better. Be it in the way a job is done, be it in relating to family members, be it driving or communication, be it in one’s view of other, or whatever may be the case. Let us change for the better.

The major two categories in which change occurs or must occur are:

1)    Inner personal life

2)    Work / Home / Business life

A fine example of the change that occurs in our personal lives is given by nature in the emergence of butterfly from the cocoon.

Metamorphosis of the adult butterfly is a beautiful example. As we studied in our school days, there is a four-stage process that produces an adult butterfly.

A) Egg: Female butterflies lay their eggs on plants to enable the newborn caterpillar (later stage) to get food from plants’ leaves.

B) Larva: Also called caterpillar. It emerges from the egg after a few days. The caterpillar spends most of its time eating.

C) Pupa: The caterpillar forms a protection shield called a pupa when it has finished growing. Most of the transformation takes place inside the pupa.

D) Butterfly: When the pupa has finished transformation, the butterfly emerges from the pupa. The adult butterfly lays eggs on plants after its mating period, and the circle repeats.

In our personal lives we should look for change, a change for the better. Through the ‘egg, larva, pupa’ stages we must wait to become the beautiful butterfly in our character and in our being. Not only does this change become a showpiece to others, but becoming beautiful in our inner selves becomes a great benefit which only we will know.

Second, in professional life, statistics indicate the amount of stress a change brings in one’s life. For instance, a person’s stress increases by 35% during the move from one house to another. Stress increases 55% during a job change; 60% when a child is born. Although the percentage differs from person to person, the issue of change and its effect on every person is significant.

The best policy is to be ready for change. Welcome it when it comes. If we build a ‘least resistance policy’ to change, which in any case is inevitable, we will eradicate undue stress and increase our ability to cope as we adapt to any system or process tactically.

–

Sam Paul is the Chief Information Officer of OM India (a reputed NGO) and a human Rights activist for the past two decades. He is currently a research student of Acharya Nagarjuna Ranga University in Andhra Pradesh.

Much of this issue stems from practices embedded within an organizational culture affecting morale and productivity. These include:

•    Leadership not serving as exemplars – some leaders today are narcissists, demeaning and ruthless. More importantly, leaders’ salaries can exceed employee pay by 425 times the average worker. Leaders need to act in harmony with employees and ensure equal treatment of all. Cultures where this practice occurs frequently include McDonalds, Fed Ex and UPS where employees and management are one.

•    Little or no accountability – the United States economic system is currently in financial turmoil and no one is accountable.

•    Career planning and succession planning is null – simply put there is no succession planning. Most CEOs and senior managers join an organization from competitive industries and companies. Whatever happened to the mailroom climb?

•    Too many silos and departmental infighting – companies are in business for one reason – to create clients. End the infighting and focus on the most vital asset! When the fighting ends (and everybody understands their reason for being employed) perhaps harmony arrives.

Causes of low morale correlate to the organization, its culture, and its management. After 25 years of research in this area, we find five factors contributing to organizational morale. A study by the Corporate Leadership Council reveals the tremendous impact managers have on an employee’s level of commitment. It is imperative to note that individuals do not leave companies – they leave poor managers. Organizational mismanagement contributes to negative morale. As recent as 2006 the Gallup Organization estimated there were 32 million actively disengaged employees costing the American economy up to $350 billion per year in lost productivity. Such loss includes absenteeism, tardiness, and poor work.

To dilute the productivity impact, research shows that taking time to build relationships with employees through personal interaction, is a key step managers can take to keep morale high. Employees need to feel trust and respect from their managers. Employees desire feedback from management to understand their work matters.

Ending the morale issue is not easy but there are cures.

1.    Begin with talent acquisition – start with the right people. No firm we work with ever hires on a proactive basis. Most firms conduct employment searches reactively. Seek employees that fit with the organizational culture and with the obligatory skills. Never wait!

2.    Hire for skill – talent is innate. Organizations hire for personality and behavior first and skill second. Skill is not interchangeable, behavior is. A great hire might have a wonderful temperament and lack the skill to plug a socket into an outlet. I recall a five star hotel that sought advice to correct housekeeping flaws. After five minutes, it was easy enough to terminate staff and find those without flaws.

3.    Look at best practices from best people – management focuses on “fixing those that cannot” rather than “improving those that can”. Icons of performance exist in your organization. Discover what they do right and encourage others to emulate it.

4.    Passion –in the 1980’s Sylvester Stallone appeared again as Rocky this time with a theme, “Eye of the Tiger”. What a great metaphor for valuable talent. Seek to acquire talent that truly loves work. Passion too is innate. Employees must love what they do and how they do it. When passion is high, so too is morale.

5.  Focus on the customer – managers, the organization, and the employees must vehemently focus on the customer. Remember Winnie the Pooh, try finding Eeyore amongst staff at Disney; Southwest Airlines and FedEx, all intensely focus on servicing the client.

Lastly, managers must constantly strive to provide feedback to employees. Feedback is not an annual performance review event. It is imperative that daily communication exists for good information and improvement. Coaching, counseling, and mentoring are components of organizational morale. In addition, many attend church and hear the words, “It is right to give thanks and praise”. Many watch professional sports and view coaches coddling athletes. We can learn something here; simple words of thanks and praise constantly improve morale and employee relationships.

Finally, the first item terminated during economic volatility is training. Research finds that employees are assets and require that treatment. Never stop training; this improves productivity and morale at all times.

Issues of low morale and productivity are onerous, volatile, and difficult to control. There is a need for management, the organization, and the individual to assist with success factors. Much is dependent on the desire to change; methods chosen and consistent follow through. However, if you do nothing you still have a morale issue. Take the time, seek remedies, and keep morale high. Doing so, lowers attrition, improves productivity, increases profitability and most importantly- reduces stress.

–

Drew Stevens is a business growth expert. He speaks and consults around the world for organizations that require expertise in leadership and marketing. Visit Drew at www.drewstevensconsulting.com/freestuff and get hundreds of dollars in FREE selling tips.

At every point of time, we are doing things. Sometimes for ourselves, sometimes for others. Actions, words, deeds, thoughts flow from us all the time. What should be our approach? How should we deal with the flow?

I feel that one have to always “Do Your Best” (DYB). Why DYB? I think that this is the only way to ensure that one’s output is of the highest quality. It is an obligation on each of us to carry out. It is a commitment to ourselves and to others to expect the best from us – nothing less.

With God’s grace, each of us is blessed with a certain level of talent and a mind which has no limits. “The only limit to achievement is in our mind” is a saying I heard long ago. It is imperative therefore that we open our minds to achieve great things. We also need to make up our minds that anything that comes out of us will be the best possible.

When each of us is in this DYB mode, the world will become a much better place. Quality of output will improve, there will be more self satisfaction and joy. When we are in DYB mode, people will sit up and notice us, appreciate us, recognise us and celebrate us. It is a great feeling.

Try it !!

–

Vish is a chartered and cost accountant who works with a leading bank in Mumbai, India, looking after their risk management. His interests are reading, travelling, spirituality, thinking and physical fitness (not necessarily in that order). Contact vish.sesh@gmail.com.

I had other reasons for feeling like I was on the top of the world…

I’d been promoted three times in the past three years. Regional Training Manager David Keith was now my colleague instead of my boss. We both reported directly to the Human Resources Director, an elderly Englishman named Anthony Kennedy. Great buddies, Dave and I usually traveled together to Singapore and other Timex assembly locations in the Far East. I enjoyed my job with the Regional Human Resources Department so much that I sometimes felt guilty getting paid. (In fact, Mr. Kennedy had been nagging me for months to complete my self-appraisal form so my annual merit increase could be processed, but I kept on putting it off. “What’s the hurry?” I told him. “I’ll get a retroactive increase anyway.”)

Although it wasn’t part of my job, I was often tapped by the Regional Marketing and Sales Group to conduct customer service seminars for Timex watch dealers. I didn’t get any extra pay, and had to stay at my desk after hours to make up for the time I spent doing these seminars, but I tremendously enjoyed helping the Timex dealers and staff understand the unique V-movement in Timex watches and why we didn’t need jewels like other mechanical or analog watches.

I also taught part-time at the National College of Business and Arts (NCBA). To cater to the thousands of young assembly workers pursuing a college degree, NCBA had opened a campus right next door to Timex. Some ingenuous folks had even constructed wooden stairs over the concrete wall that separated Timex and NCBA, shaving off a few minutes from the walk out the Timex front gate, down the block, and into the NCBA campus.

My growing family lived in relative comfort. In fact, we had recently moved into a beautiful bungalow in San Mateo (Rizal), a town outside Metro Manila. The peace and quiet, not to mention breath-taking views of the sunset and the mountains, more than made up for the hour-long commute to/from the Timex watch assembly plant in Cubao, Quezon City.

Life was great, I thought to myself that fateful Friday in January 1983 as I bounded up the steps to the Regional Office, still humming “I’m on the top of the world” under my breath.
Even as the massive frosted glass doors slammed shut behind me, I knew that something was terribly wrong. The office was eerily quiet. There was none of the usual morning chatter as the regional staff got ready for another busy day. What was even more chilling was that the staff desks were all unoccupied, and the directors’ office doors were all closed (a rare sight in the “come-right-in-and-tell-me-what’s-on-your-mind” atmosphere of the regional office).

“Where’s everyone?” I quizzed Dave, glancing at all the empty desks. “In there,” he replied, gesturing towards the closed doors. He paused and then said with an inscrutable expression on his face, “The old man wants to see you.”

My heart pounding in my throat, I tremulously stepped into Mr. Kennedy’s office. There I learned the painful truth. Timex was closing down the Manila facility and consolidating its Philippine assembly operation in Cebu. I’d be losing my job by end of March. “But I’m three months pregnant!” I blurted out. Mr. Kennedy said there was nothing he could do. “Don’t worry, you’ll easily find another job,” he assured me.

I left Mr. Kennedy’s office in a daze and headed for the cafeteria. The hallway was filled with distraught assembly workers. Unlike me, these girls had been handed their final paychecks and asked to leave immediately. Some of them were wailing unabashedly, while others sobbed quietly as they gathered their personal belongings from their lockers. It was surreal. The words “I cried because I had no shoes, until I saw a man who had no feet,” came to my mind, as I forgot my own misery and tried to console the girls as best I could.

That weekend, I started sending out job applications and writing to headhunters. Nancy, a consultant with a leading search firm, echoed Mr. Kennedy’s assurance that I’d easily land another job – until I told her that I was pregnant. She promised to check with her clients and get back to me. I knew the answer even before she called. “I’m really sorry,” she apologized, “but my clients prefer someone who can work uninterrupted during their first year.” It was the same elsewhere. I’d get as far as the interview but the minute I mentioned I was pregnant the door would close. Some well-meaning friends advised me not to disclose that I was pregnant but I didn’t want to start a new job based on deception. I decided to stop wasting time, money, and effort on a futile – and extremely frustrating – job search, and wait until after I gave birth.

When March came and I got my final pay, I realized to my chagrin that through my own fault (neglecting my self-appraisal), my separation pay had been computed on my current (lower) base salary.  To make matters worst, the kids got sick and I needed to spend for lab tests and medicine. My bank account quickly dwindled down to zero. Fortunately, a nearby grocery store allowed me to buy food and other necessities on credit – but for how long?

I sold Avon products and Readers Digest subscriptions to help pay the bills. The only mails I received were window envelopes, some with “FINAL NOTICE” stamped in red. I didn’t have any money for a cake or ice-cream for my son’s fifth birthday, and it broke my heart.

Then, on May 26 (my birthday!), I received unexpected mail. I stared at the Abenson letterhead for some time, racking my brains for anyone I knew in the country’s largest appliance chain, before opening the envelope. The salutation read “To the Baby Maker, from the Profit Taker” and went on to say that Abenson was offering me the position of Human Resources Development Manager. It was a total surprise since I didn’t know anyone in Abenson but I soon learned that the Timex Marketing Director was also Abenson’s consultant, and the Timex watch dealership was owned by the same family.

So, while I waited to give birth to an adorable baby girl, I had a job waiting for me. I realized that I needed to LOSE my job to GAIN this managerial position. God does work in mysterious ways.

1.) Just start.  That’s it – just get started.  Pick up one stack to sort or one drawer to clean out. Just take one step on your new walking program.  If you’re like me, once I get started, it’s game on.

2.) Hire someone else to do it.  Seriously.  I pay someone to clean my house and it is the best money I spend.  I don’t want to spend my time cleaning, but I don’t want to live in a dirty house.  Let’s say paying someone isn’t an option for you.  No problem – just find out what it would cost to pay someone, then next time you find yourself putting it off, think, “If I get this done it will save me $75.”  You’ll either be motivated to do it or you’ll write the check.

3.) Let go of perfection.  I believe (and we do lie best when we lie to ourselves) that my procrastination is linked to my perfectionism.  I feel that if I can’t do something right (i.e. perfect), I shouldn’t do it at all.  So when I think about the database entry, I think I don’t have time to do it all, so I do nothing. And a 15 minute job accumulates into a five hour job and all my leads are cold.  Better to do it halfway than not do it at all.  Better to walk one mile than zero.  Better to have half the laundry folded than none.  And go back to number one – once you start, you often finish.  Perfectionism is idiotic.  (And yes, I am working on being less of an idiot.)

This is another reason why people don’t delegate or hire others.  Many women tell me they won’t hire someone to clean their homes because that person wouldn’t do the job as well as they would.  Okay – if you want to spend your life cleaning your baseboards, rock on!  I’ll be out enjoying my life.

4.) Trick yourself.  I got a lot of this done because I fooled myself into thinking it was fun.  I sat at my desk, lit some candles, put on some TV shows I like and did data entry for hours.  Hey – see number three – we lie best when we lie to ourselves.  Tell yourself going through all that junk you’ve been hoarding will be fun!  Whee!!!  Or find a way to make it fun for you – invite a friend over to help you with your closet or promise yourself a reward when you’re finished.   Bribe yourself!

5.) Create urgency.  I wanted to get stuff donated before the end of the year to help reduce my taxes, so I cleaned out closets.  Maybe you have a birthday coming up and you don’t want to spend another year in your current state.  If you can set some kind of goal or deadline, this will help.

6.) Dump it all.  Maybe there are stacks in your office or a bunch of junk in your garage.  Get a box (or boxes or trash bags) and just pitch it all.  If you are not using that stuff, get rid if it!  If that’s too drastic, date the boxes – if you didn’t need anything out of then in a year – for God’s sake – THROW THEM AWAY!  If it’s a hobby or a craft project or a piece of exercise equipment – be honest with yourself – use the damn thing or toss it.  Here people start thinking, but I spent $250 on that!  Yep – then try to sell it on Ebay, because that money is gone, baby and it ain’t coming back.  Most of the time your old junk really is just junk.  For all the time it might take to sell it, you’d be better off just taking it to Goodwill and writing it off.

7.) Multitask – maybe.  Depending on the task, multitasking might help or it might harm.  If it’s reading, I can go through a lot of stuff while I ride the stationary bike.  I feel like I’m getting some exercise AND accomplishing something.  I love it!  But sometimes trying to multitask derails me.  Deactivating my e-mail alert was a huge time saver – no distraction, more focus, more execution.  Every interruption slows you down dramatically.

8.) Think of the consequences.  If I don’t update my database I lose touch with my clients and that can cost me money.  If you don’t go through those stacks on your desk, you look disorganized and lose credibility.  If you have chaos in your e-mail inbox, you may miss opportunities or appear unreliable.  If nothing else, clutter saps your energy and wastes your time.  Take control.

Try a couple of these – I’m telling you from the other side, when you finally get the task done, it will take much less time than you thought and you’re going to feel a lot better about yourself.  Now I need to get that mailing out.

————————

Denise Ryan, MBA, is a Certified Speaking Professional, a designation of excellence held by less than 10% of all professional speakers.  She is a blogger http://motivationbychocolate.blogspot.com
Her website is http://www.firestarspeaking.com where you can see more articles and sign up for a free newsletter.

Think about this. This employer, whenever they decided to offer you the current position, clearly did that on the basis of your personal and professional credentials. In most cases, it could be even probable that you were offered the coveted position only a few months back. And when the employer did so, it was clearly on the basis of merit and merit alone. So, the pink slip was an occurrence owing to the global happenings that have had a cascading effect that has had a bearing on your organization too.

And whole bunches of your own colleagues and peers, and those in the professional fraternity have been affected. All of them are competent and capable in some way or the other. So are YOU. You were a clear choice for a said role and responsibility. You have been doing a good or even a fabulous job. You have contributed so much to the top-line and bottom-line, directly or indirectly. In the rush to manage changes in such times, most organizations seldom even communicate in this way… guess you need to take it in your stride and move on.

So, even remotely connecting the event – pink slip – to your capabilities will be doing gross injustice to you as a person. Never ever do that. (Just in case you are reading this as a fortunate not-pink-lipped, now you know what is to be told to your mind and heart.)

When you have not been responsible for the event, you only have to ACT now on what can be done to make things better. And steering clear of any negative thoughts and self pity gives you so much of positive energy and mind space to focus on what needs to be done now.

The future holds so much more than the present. You have all the knowledge and power to do whatever you choose personally and professionally. And for that just make sure that there are no energy leaks – from your mind and body.

You are even more capable now, with more time to do and plan your future. Choose that mindset and it will do all the good to you.

Look only for the positive. Shun the bad vibes, and all the negativity.

Thanks to the nature of our lives and work today, most of us are hooked to the internet, 24/7. This makes us sort of vulnerable to the news. The news spreads fasts. And bad news spreads even faster. And thanks to the fierce competition for viewer eyeballs and readership, television and the print media have a liking to cover news about jobs lost and pink slips.

If you are connected now, just Google for the words pink slip or job loss, and there you get all gloom and negativity right at your table; but what I suggest is precisely the opposite – resist the temptation to hunt for the bad news.

What the media does is to spread a sense of gloom all over. You can’t help much, as they are doing their job. But here is what you can do.

Don’t pay attention to any information that will feed to your sense of uncertainty.  You are capable, and all the more sure of what you want -  a great opportunity, a better way of living, all the positive energy possible, and a great mental make up to keep you happy when things seemingly are not at their best.

So, make it a point to read only information about growth plans, good things that are happening, which industries will do well, what areas you can re-skill yourself in, where inspirational, good speeches and well-being seminars are happening etc. That will make you feel good. And in turn you will be an ambassador of good news.

The unfortunate thing that happens in such times is that wherever you are – your desk at the office, cafeteria, or in the public transport – a vast majority of the discussions are only around what is going wrong. Seldom do most of us realize that all this talk of recession and slowdown spreads negativity all over. It is just not possible for you to focus on the good things of life, when what all you hear and see is not so good.

And that is the precise reason you need to discipline yourself only to be inclined to hear and see good news. Spread cheer. Talk more with your spouse and kids. Play with them. Teach you kid and ask him what happened at school today. See if your spouse needs any support at her work or in home-making. Abhor watching television – by doing that, in all probability you are catching what you avoid outside right at your drawing room!

You could connect more with your hobbies for which you seldom had time. Read books you like. Write to your friends and well-wishers, and those in your professional network. Attempt to connect with old friends and relatives. Connect with an NGO where you can be of some help.

Go ahead and do something that will make you feel good or make you a better person. As most personality gurus would say, like attracts like. Good attracts good. So, make it a point that you will attract only the good. Or one step ahead, ONLY THE BEST.

–

Muralidharan is an HR practitioner and a recruitment professional. A strong believer in spreading cheer and positivity, Murali currently works out of Chennai and is a voracious reader and a prolific writer.

If life did not meet your expectations, perhaps it is time to prime the pump first!  Let me explain.

Most of us are looking for similar things in life: more time, love, joy, and quality of life.  What we sometimes forget, is that we first need to prime the pump in order to get what we want.

On my grandfather’s farm was a creaky old water pump.  Before it would start drawing water from the well, it had to be primed with a cup of water.  As a child, I used to marvel at the mystery of it all – first pouring a cup of water down the pump and then pumping the squeaky lever up and down, up and down… until a small stream of water would start running from the spout.  Once the stream started flowing, one could fill up as many buckets with water as needed, and it all started with the simple act of priming the pump with water first.

That water pump would not yield water unless it was primed with water – the very same substance that I desired from it.  I had to first contribute to the process the same substance that I desired to receive from it. In life it works the same way: we prime the pump of life with that which we contribute, and we attract that which we emanate.

If we emanate lack, we cannot attract abundance and if we emanate anger, we cannot attract love.  Because like attracts like, we therefore need to first prime the pump by giving of that which we desire.

In the process, the very quality we focus on giving out becomes an integral part of our being. Just as that old water pump on the farm yielded as much water as desired after it was primed, a life that exudes love, abundance and joy, draws to it the same qualities in abundance.

This year, instead of wishing for success, how about priming the pump instead with the very qualities you would like to see more of in your life!

Here are some ideas to get you started.  By practicing even just one of these principles consistently over time, you will find that life returns to you a bountiful measure of the same.

1. I treat everyone in my life with the love and respect that I would receive from them.
2. I believe it is more important to be loving than to be right, and I apply this in my life daily.
3. I look for the beauty in every person and everything that crosses my path.
4. I practice loving kindness toward all sentient beings.
5. I take steps to simplify my life so I can enjoy more with less.
6. I find time to nurture my body, mind and soul, even if it is only a few minutes each day.
7. I focus on what is right rather than what is wrong.
8. I forgive those who have hurt me and let go of old wrongs so there may be peace on earth.
9. I look for solutions, not for scapegoats.
10. I find and express gratitude in my life each day.

–

Ada is an Arizona-based kinesiologist, vibrational healer/instructor and a life balance coach. Her work blends compassion and Higher wisdom with powerful intention to accomplish profound shifts of consciousness for clients. Visit her web site www.AdaPorat.com.

Winners view the world as a benevolent place. To Albert Einstein’s famous thought provoking question, ‘Is this a friendly universe?’ the winners always answer in affirmative. They feel that the world is full of great opportunities and wonderful people. Winners see the world as mainly good with some bad bits. The losers view the world as mainly malevolent with some good bits. How do you view the world? Your answer to this question speaks volumes about you and your station in life.

Winners have the habit of visualizing their future in bright details. They approve of themselves. Life is an exciting adventure for them. They live it to the fullest. Losers view life as a chore. If someone casually asks them, ‘How is it going?’ they will open their box of woes. ‘Just getting along.’, ‘Life goes on.’ are standard responses. What do you think life will dole out to them? Like Aladdin’s genie, life would say, ‘Your wish is my command.’

Winners are dreamers. They dream big, because they know that today’s dreams are tomorrow’s reality. They work backwards from a future dream to the present day and make their plans to achieve their goals. Losers too dream, but they don’t back up these dreams with systematic action plan. What are such dreams called?  These dreams are no more than ethereal hot air.

Winners possess another great quality Рdiscipline. Their discipline keeps them going during temporary setbacks. Thus they convert their ‘yearning power’ into their ‘earning power’. What do you think the losers do? When going gets tough, they hang their boots. They proclaim that the luck is not in their favour. They give up too easily.

Winners value time. They guard against procrastination, the thief of their precious commodity, their time. Losers discuss amongst themselves that they will start working one day real soon, but that day doesn’t dawn. They are unaware of the thrill of victory after a job well done. They are not willing to pay the life’s cost of admission to the big league. They do not know the enjoyment of work. They do not put their best efforts into anything. 

Winners take care of their physical fitness. They know that neither their body nor their mind will work at an optimal level without it. Therefore they give attention to their habits, diet and exercise regimen.
Winners have pleasing personalities. They acquire the art of making themselves agreeable to others. They learn to negotiate with others without creating friction of any sort. They are flexible and adaptable. They harmonise with any given environment and possess necessary magnetism to attract others.
Winners understand the value of initiative. They never have to be told what to do and how to do it. They create plans and translate them into actions through their initiative. They do not need to be supervised all the time.

To be a winner for life, identify what your ideal life will look like. Create a compelling vision for your future. Formulate goals for its achievement. Never give up on your hopes and dreams of a bright future. Overcome temporary setbacks. Look at them as great learning experiences.

Earl Nightingale, one of the earlier personal development teachers, and co-founder of the publishing house ‘Nightingale-Conant’, defined success as ‘the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.’ As long as you are ‘progressing’ towards an ideal that you think is worthy of achievement, you are succeeding. Enjoying the journey makes it all the more worthwhile. You will do well to remember that the word ‘worthwhile’ means that your goal is worth your time and energy. Think about that. Are your goals worthy of your life?

If you consider the fact that the price for your achievements is your time, which is all that you have of any real value, you will soon see the importance of having a goal that is worthy of your most prized possession. So go back over your goals and see if they meet the criteria for being worthy of you, not the other way around. If not, then maybe you need to stretch yourself and go for something of more importance to you. You will be a real winner then.

Practically speaking, your actions and your behaviour determine how your destiny will unfold. Knowing that your fate is in your hands, what are you going to do about it? Are you ready to be a winner? Remember in order to get something you’ve got to give something. So give up dependence, procrastination, laziness, need for approval, self criticism, and the loser attitude.

If a window of correcting the course of your life exists, why not open it and let in some fresh air? The basic question, however, remains to be answered. Answer it now. The question is, ‘Are you willing?’
The choice is yours. The window is open. And you can begin now.

Our own good intentions are often hidden so deep that we are sometimes not even consciously aware of them. And our reactions are usually so deeply ingrained and spontaneous that we seem to be having no conscious control over them. Still we want others to judge us from the best that we can be, or from our best intentions that are hidden deep beneath our angry reactions. However, when it comes to judging others, we tend to judge others not by their inherent goodness, but without a second thought, by their panicky reactions. It seems that it gives us immense pleasure in proving that we are better persons than others—though the person we all are is the same One without the other.

There is a 20-year-old lampshade at our home that I was considering to throw away as a part of routine monthly cleaning. It suddenly struck me that except for being dirty it was still functional. I spent an hour cleaning it with Brasso and tamarind solution. Now, it had the incredible shine on it that any owner would feel proud of, and I realized what a mistake it would have been had I really thrown it away.

We all are like this beautiful shining lampshade. But we do not care to connect ourselves back to our natural luster and shine—our divinity—through the ‘Brasso’ and tamarind solution of conscious breathing, meditation, daily review of our actions, contemplation, introspection, and mindful living. We seem to have lost touch with the great potential we have, and the mission we are born to fulfill with it. Disconnected from our real inherent goodness we get easily overpowered by the dirt (our conditioned reactions) that we have allowed to gather on ourselves.

Inside the golden cage that we tend to clean with care every day, the divine bird within starves to be cleaned and fed. Those, whom we tend to admire as saints, are no more divine than the cruelest among us; they have only come to be more aware and better connected to their divine bird within through the three questions that they keep asking themselves. So next time you are about to react with anger to humiliate someone with vengeance ask yourself (like them):

1. “Is it in accordance with what I really am and stand for?”

2. “Am I reacting out of my past conditioning (and reinforcing it thereby) or acting out of the lessons learnt thereof?

3. Am I, a few moments from now, going to feel peaceful, happy and contented, or regret what I am about to do (or not do) or speak (or not speak—for example, saying that you are grateful)?
 
The more often you ask these questions during the day the more quickly you will regain your connection with your real divine and blissful self within. However the practical problem in this is the fact that we get so carried away by our ceaseless thoughts, emotions and the activities of the day that we usually do not have the briefest of intervals at our disposal to have the opportunity to ask these three questions and the dirt of our conditioned responses keeps on accumulating. Here is the trick called ‘Develop your backpedaling  muscle’ to take care of this problem.

Develop your `backpedaling’ muscle to keep the dirt from accumulating.

Often people suffer more from their negative emotions and consequent reactions based on them than from others’ deeds that evoke them.

So let your actions stem from your core self instead from your conditioned reactions. Shift your focus of attention from judging what the external world is doing to you to observing how you are responding to it. Others can offend and hurt you only if you permit them to.

And we permit them to offend and hurt us only when

a) We resist their freedom to act the way they want to even if it is absurd, immature, cruel, and unjust or seemingly at our cost.

b) We judge others’ actions, especially when we do so negatively. Without a judgment there is no ‘emovere’ or disturbance, and in its absence the undisturbed stillness of the present moment still continues to remain with you. And your judgments are after all merely a collection of thoughts.

Others’ wrong behaviour, in fact, belongs to us because it is always a reflection of what is wrong with our own inner world. It is therefore a feedback we can use as important lessons in our lives. Although our negative emotions seem to be our responses to something external they are purely our own creation. We create them because we do not want to take the responsibility for any unpleasant thing and being good at projecting things out we tend to locate their source outside ourselves. Negative emotions, in fact, are the way some people have learnt to process and respond to external happenings with.

While cycling we start backpedaling, in case we want to stay in balance without wanting to move forward with the ongoing usual fast speed lest it may make us ram into a vehicle waiting at the red light. Similarly whenever you are about be carried away by the strong winds of the ill learnt emotional upheavals and negative reactions rising within you, imagine that you are ‘back pedaling’ i.e. you are letting your negative reactions and emotions be watched by you without being acted upon. This is best done in two parts: begin to become aware of your breathing and then start anticipating the response your emotions and habits are about to drive you to. This will also give you the necessary time interval and opportunity to ask and answer the above three vital questions. Though, it is simple but shall prove to be a life-transforming habit for you.

Initially you may find that it isn’t easy backpedaling (holding yourself from action that your negative emotions are tending to drive you to), but every single time you bring yourself to manage to do it you will be strengthening your ‘backpedaling’ muscle. Learn to sacrifice what you are (all that appears to be tempting, convenient and easy now) for the sake of what you want yourself to be (the difficult part that you want to eventually turn into easy, convenient and spontaneous).

With practice, as your back pedaling muscle grows in strength you will begin to realize that you are regaining your will power and grip over your life. An infant finds it difficult to grip a ball or a spoon but with practice it becomes easier. Things become easier for her only because, despite the inconvenience, she first takes up the challenge to consistently do what appears difficult to her. How intelligent would it have been for her to choose instant ease and convenience every time only to eternally postpone the ease that was supposed to be her birthright?

To lead a blissful life is no one else’s but our own responsibility. When we blame others for keeping such a life from us, it still is kept from us. Fixing blame does not fix the problem. Only by taking responsibility and working towards it, does a blissful life become ours.