To begin, you must expect your audience to drift on and off from time to time while you speak.  To bring them back to you, you will need to complement a strong visual image together with a variation in your speech delivery and interesting visual aids.  It is therefore important to realise that different styles of clothes or dress will be required for different audiences.

The business presentation

If your audience is small for example, a boardroom presentation, you will have to adopt a softer and less intimidating look.  A bright red suit just won’t do in such a scenario.  The key is to wear something that will relax your audience. So, women should go for neutral coloured suits and introduce more colour with blouses.  The accessories should be kept to minimum; a gold and pearl combination looks most elegant.   For men, don’t dazzle your audience with bright colours or wild patterns.  Keep your suit black or navy blue and instead of wearing a burning red tie, go for calming colours like green, blue or gray.  The trick is that if you concentrate the colour near your face, it will act like a spotlight focusing attention on you and what you are saying.

On the other hand, a large audience becomes ‘a theatre’ and therefore requires a ‘costume’.  Thus, a navy-suited speaker will not create much of an impact at a conference of 500 people.  This will call for the occasion of bringing more colours into your jacket if not the entire suit. Try brighter colours to win your audience’s attention. Remember, it is the colour of your suit and not the bold patterns of your suits.

It will be useful if you can check the lighting of the room before your presentation. If the area where you are speaking is dark, you will need to brighten up by wearing lighter or brighter shades.

When selecting the style of your suits, do take into account how your body reacts under the stress of giving presentations. If you are the type that moves around when speaking, then be sure your clothes allow plenty of movement. Avoid tight skirts or jackets. Always keep your jackets buttoned when speaking so as to avoid any unnecessary distractions (e.g. your bosom, tummy or waist).

Make sure you are well groomed. Women should wear flattering makeup that is not too heavy and have their hair done stylishly. Similarly, men should have a clean-shaven look with their hair neatly trimmed and styled.

Appearing on television

The idea of appearing on television can be very daunting. If we watch news interviews or panel discussions, often times, we take particular note of how badly the interviewee can come across in terms of his or her appearance. It is very difficult to concentrate on what is said by someone who is wearing a gaudy scarf, necklace or even tie. Nonetheless, accept the fact that you will look bigger when you appear on TV. So, do not worry when you see yourself on TV; it is the camera, and not you.  Read on to find out the following tips to look great for your TV debut.

Remember to wear simple outfits without any distraction from your face. This means you should wear solid colours avoiding black and white shirts or tops. Black tops cancel out your top half, and it makes you look formless. White makes you look pale and washed out. You should also avoid red which tends to ‘bleed’ on camera -  the edges run and look fuzzy. Stripes or herringbone patterns can appear to be ‘dancing’ or moving around the screen. A monochromatic blend of colours is the best! Plunging necklines are no-no and again keep your jewellery or accessories to minimum.

Makeup is a must when appearing on TV. Most TV shows would have a makeup artist. If not, you will have to put on foundation before you appear in front of the camera. Pl

Have you wondered why Oprah Winfrey’s talk show is still the most popular talk show in TV? Or why is Madonna still a very sought after pop singer after more than two decades? Well, the answers lie not only on the talents possessed by these individuals but something beyond that. These personalities have ‘branded’ themselves well and they make efforts to consciously do or refrain from doing things that affect their brand image.

We all know that business is becoming more and more competitive. There are numerous others who seem to be offering the same stuff that you do. Whether you are a senior executive, the president of your own company, or a worker at a small organization, you need to stand out from myriad others so that you can be in control of your business or career.

Personal branding is a powerful way of communicating and clarifying the unique promise of value that you have to offer your boss or your clients.  Management guru Tom Peters in book The Brand You 50 states: “Regardless of age, regardless of position, regardless of the business we happen to be in, all of us need to understand the importance of branding: we are the CEOs of our own companies: Me Inc.”

In this article, I will take you through 6 P’s in helping you to make your own personal brand alive:

1.    Personal

Like any other good marketing plan, you must begin by understanding your true self. Remember you are an original – there is no one else quite like you.  What do you stand for? What are your beliefs? Jot down a few phrases that describe your unique value, vision, purpose and passion. Take some time to discover your strengths, weaknesses and hidden talents. Ask yourself what impacts you the most and what drives you.

2.    Perception
It is imperative that you must be aware of how you are communicating yourself to those around you. In this area, you will need to know your attributes and how others perceive you as an individual. Develop a focus group comprising of close friends, colleagues and family members to ask, collate responses and consolidate their perceptions about you. For example, are you seen as reliable, trustworthy or adventurous with a natural instinct for business?

3.    Position

You must know your target audience, business or job competitors.  How can you stand out unless you know whom you are standing among? When people see your name or face consistently over a period of time they assume that you have something special and that you must be successful. Having your own brand keeps you visible within your marketplace as it sends out a clear message about you that makes you worth contacting.

4.    Performance

Establish yourself as an expert in your field because expertise can bring you increased recognition and therefore you can position yourself well in the hearts and minds of your target audience. Get good testimonials from your satisfied customers and for employees, create outstanding portfolios of your past accomplishments. Create a personal mission statement and tagline. Do seek out new and challenging assignments that will build your brand. Write articles to showcase your knowledge and get them published, or better, give speeches or presentations to share your expertise and your past achievements.

5.    Promoting

You can have an amazing brand, but if no one knows about it, you are not going ahead. Nothing in marketing is more powerful than a promotion tool called word of mouth. What your network of friends, colleagues, clients and customers say about your brand is what the market will ultimately gauge as the value of the brand. If you do not have a personal website, now is the time to buy a domain (such as myname.com) and the let the world know. Take your personal image seriously because your appearance is the packaging of your own brand. Remember, YOU are the product and your packaging will either attract or detract from your product.

6.    Planning

Make an appointment with yourself at least twice a year to re-evaluate your personal brand statement. Also, obtain honest and helpful feedback from your focus group on your brand performance, value and growth.

Have you ever walk into a business establishment where the host, salesperson or customer service provider makes you feel so special that you love going back, even though you could have gotten a better deal elsewhere? The difference is more than the product, services, quality, price, terms, availability or delivery dates. It is the charisma, personality, manner, charm & presentation of these people.

The chemistry & actions of people can either repel or attract you to do business with them. All of us have to do some form of selling in every area of our life, whether we are aware of it or not. The principle of charisma, charm & a positive personality is contagious, & it attracts people to you like a magnet at work & at home.

Self- confidence
When you feel self-confident, you naturally carry with you a level of charisma & charm to the forefront. To get self-confidence going for you every morning, start with dressing for the part you want. If you are leaving for work, dressing up professionally not only makes you look good & feel great, you are more apt to conduct & present yourself in a professional manner. Chances are when you feel good about yourself; you will do your best & hence be more confident.

Focus
Maintain your focus & refuse to allow yourself to be distracted by issues other than the task at hand. This is crucial especially when you want to actively listen to your partner, your prospects’ challenges, needs & objectives. For instance, when speaking to your clients over the telephone, do not read your emails at the same time. Active listening requires your full & uninterrupted attention. Remember you are not in a meeting to give a sales pitch, but to help your customers solve their problems or achieve their objective, & you cannot do so until you know what it is. So give them your undivided attention.

Interest & Attitude
So what makes people attracted to you? Psychologists have researched & explore many factors for years, including physical qualities, cooperativeness, intelligence & many others. One strong finding is that people are attracted to you when you share the same attitude about life, such as parenting, work ethics, values & philosophy, relationships, welfare, legislation, even movies, smoking & drinking. It affirms a person’s ability to be sensible, to interpret the world correctly, and to make good predictions about the future. Another reason is people naturally assume that those who share similar interest and attitude will like them, which in turn make them like you. So if you want to be favorably received, see if you can look deeper & find where you agree rather than disagree. Everyone prefers to hear that ‘you are right’ rather than ‘you are wrong’.

Sex appeal
Another interesting fundamental is sex appeal which adds flair to your personality. Even if you are a warm, interesting & approachable person, your interactions with others can be flat if you don’t show at least a little sex appeal. Sex appeal goes beyond sexuality. It’s different from the sheer physical attributes of showing skin or flaunting your body. It is a sign of openness to engage others by becoming interested in what they do & how they think & feel. It is a healthy & natural part of yourself that you display, in all settings; whether it’s business, social or romantic. The process is the way you show your appeal, through your appreciation & attraction to others with your sense of physical confidence.
Even supermodels can lack appeal if they lack interest in others & are unresponsive.

Responding to others
“People do not want to be sold a product or service. They want to deal with people who they think have their interest or who care about them.
- J. Oliver Crom, CEO, Dale Carnegie

Showing people, however subtly that you find them unique & interesting makes them feel good about themselves, and thus they feel good about you. Giving them your full attention is a good way of building rapport & creating a momentary exclusive world of ‘you & me’. Some easy ways to show attraction is through eye contact, a warm handshake and displaying special interest & appreciation in others.

Reaching out
Another way of showing attraction or interest is with touch. Subtle touches are good if you are careful & sensitive about the norms as to what is appropriate and comfortable to most people. People generally like to be touched likely even in nonromantic settings. A gentle, light & sincere touch somewhere between the shoulder and hand such as the elbow area can have a powerful positive impact on your feeling about that person even when he or she is a stranger. When meeting someone the first time, you can touch others casually as a gesture to get their attention, or to direct their attention somewhere else. The message usually is: I like you & I am a warm person. However, we need to exercise caution that going overboard may make others feel uncomfortable resulting in an adverse effect.

Be comfortable in your own skin
Your self-image & how you feel about yourself shows in how you carry yourself, your posture and your gait. The way you exhibit your body emotion is contagious much like a smile or a yawn. You can hear your own voice but you can’t see your own mannerisms and body the way others can. Hence you need to be conscious of your physical presence and the way you hold yourself. Even though you may not have control over your physical attributes, your physical presentation, your body movement & body language are noticed by other people which you may not be aware. Avoid displaced energy such as fidgeting and nervous movements. Being comfortable with who you are with confidence is how you want to be perceived. When you embrace your body & dress appropriately for the occasion, you will feel attractive and tend to present yourself positively. In turn others will feel good in your presence & thus find you more attractive.

Article contributed by Betty Kan, a Singapore based trainer and personal branding consultant.

Marilyn Monroe in the most famous dress ever by William Travilla and Ferragamo stilettos appeared in The Seven Year Itch in 1955. Everlastingly imprinted on the brain is the image of the white halterneck dress above the street grating and Marilyn fighting to control the swirling skirt. In How To Marry A Millionaire who could forget that wonderful fuschia pink strapless dress as men fight to carry her off.

Heartbreakingly beautiful, broodingly sexy, bad boy Marlon Brando in On the Waterfront and A Streetcar Named Desire. He made the T shirt, leather jacket and jeans a male fashion staple as relevant today as in the 50’s.
Yves St Laurent dressed Catherine Deneuve in Belle de Jour and she remained his muse for years. This dress for example is as stylish today as in 1967. Primly proper and elegant of course, the ideal attire for misspent afternoons. Who would have guessed?

In the early 70’s Ralph Lauren was relatively unknown until Robert Redford and Mia Farrow appeared in The Great Gatsby, dressed by him. Ralph Lauren again in Annie Hall, saw Diane Keaton dressed in manly clothes still looking strikingly elegant in 1974. This set off a fashion for women to wear the boyfriend jacket and waistcoats the first time round.

Bonnie and Clyde with Faye Dunaway and Warren Beatty set off a trend for 1930’s fashion. Theodore Van Runkles’ costumes and Faye’s wonderful hair made this film fantastically watchable. Madonna in Desperately Seeking Susan, wears a highly visible bra and suddenly underwear as outerwear is everywhere in 1984 and still is worn today. Dolce and Gabbana, Gaultier, Vivienne Westwood still produce corsetry in clothing.

Michael Douglas in Wall Street, symbolised that “greed was good” in the 80’s. In red braces and huge stripes, the Yuppie was born and also our love of excess that continued unabashed until recently.

In recent years the massive success of blockbuster Sex in the City (2008), saw women everywhere striving to look like Carrie Bradshaw. Whilst appearing to barely work, Carrie accumulated effortlessly an enormous shoe and designer wardrobe collection. What was her secret? Can we have it please!

Johnnie Depp, who is himself a living fashion icon, starring in Pirates of the Caribbean, initiated another round of pirate fashion. Not since the 1980’s with Adam Ant, has swashbuckling style been so in fashion!
The Devil Wears Prada saw Meryl Streep circa 2006, with stunning grey hair in severely chic and elegant clothes whilst her younger underlings struggled to keep up. This was a serious fashion lady, helped by free clothes and a seemingly endless budget she looked just tremendous.

In Confessions of a Shopaholic, we have Rebecca working hard, earning very little, but still determined to keep up to the minute. As an often inspired shopaholic, a series of eclectic, whimsical, and original outfits ensue.
Bold contrasting colours, leopardskin, tartans, plaids, and chic monochrome outfits abound. Brilliant accessories colour matched such as flowers, gold metal belts, fur boots in pink, show Rebecca is a girl who stands out, is adventurous but at the same time wears high fashion.

In Coco Avant Chanel, a new film about the supremely elegant, achingly chic Coco Chanel is an inspiration to women everywhere. Gabrielle is credited with inventing the little black dress, the sun tan for upper class women, multiple strings of pearls and the eternal Chanel No 5, still one of the world’s top perfumes. The invention of the boxy short classic jacket, tailored dresses and trousers meant women, could for the first time, take men’s tailoring skills and make them their own. This film no doubt will stoke Chanel fever all over again.

GabrielleTeare is the Leading London Personal Stylist and Personal Shopper based in the heart of Shopping in Chelsea, London. The agency is currently Alexa ranked No1 Globally for Personal Stylist. As an International Fashion and Style Consultant Gabrielle is a style/editorial consultant for 3 Disney films. http://www.gabrielleteare.com

Choose happiness!

Make a choice each day; choose to be happy with what comes and what has gone. There are plenty of things to rejoice about.

Do not forget the little things: Your smiling colleague. The little girl who babbles with her mother. The wind flying through your hair, making you feel like you are living. Every little thing like this is happiness smiling your way.

We want to see all of the big happy things, but remember to see all these little things; the ones we barely notice in our everyday lives.

Look around you and see the world as if you’ve never seen it before. Put the “happy goggles” on. Look at the people around you, look at the nature, look at the wildlife, look at the surroundings, see how wonderful it all is.

Can you do it?
Try!

Are you feeling stupid?
Try again!

Did you find something?
Do you smile a little bit now?

You are on the right track!

The first step is not the most difficult step, it is simply the first.

Now think of three things that made you smile or left you feeling happy today.

Write them down.
Now look at them again and recall the emotion you gained from each thing.

Now remember the three things that made you happy yesterday.

Write them down.
Look at them again and recall the emotions individually.

Then think about three things that you felt happy about during the last week.

Write them down.
Look at them again and recall the emotions you felt from them individually.

Can you see the pattern? )

It works – try it and you will see. If you do this exercise over and over again for a couple of days, you will not be satisfied with just three things. You recall even more.

When you begin, it may be difficult to find three things, but suddenly it dawns on you, that the positive experiences are queuing up on you.

You attract them and you choose to see them. Indeed, they are present all of the time, but you must choose to see them )

Why are we doing this?

The principle is that your happiness is a choice, and you can turn it on, even off, whenever you please, but you might need to practise at first. The amazing thing is that the more you choose to turn on your happiness-switch, the easier it gets.

Now, you might be left thinking: “All the terrible things happen to me, all the time!”

I know – I’ve been there!! But yet again, it is about how you handle it.

People get sick and other traumatic things happen, but you can choose how you want to move forward.

Take life in your own hands and do not let others choose your path. There will always be situations that you can not change. However, you can change how you see them, and you can change what you learn from them.

I know it might seem difficult, but believe in yourself – it can be done!

Find a bright spot, hold on to it, and don’t let it slip away from you. Find the next bright spot, see the small pleasures and make sure to really feel it in your heart. Feel it in your soul.

Laugh all that you can, see all the funny movies you love, or the ones you haven’t seen yet, and laugh. Put your pain behind you and choose life and happiness.

I have been going down this path, and I truly believe that you can do the same!

Let us choose happiness!

We marvel at the Hema Malinis, Madonnas and Rekhas of the world, but no one divulges their secrets to us.

Let me let you on to a ‘not so well kept’, yet ‘not so much practiced’ secret! Get ready to be enlightened! The truth is that the human body has been designed for self-renewal. Our cells are being continuously repaired and replaced automatically. Let us acknowledge and be grateful for the magnificence of this marvel, called human body. Let us start appreciating and blessing it, instead of abusing and misusing it.

Our body is the temple of our soul. It is worthy of our respect. But what do we do about it? We continually find faults with it. We are never satisfied with our bodies. Even the so-called beautiful people go in for a little nip here and a little tuck there in their eternal search for a perfect face and a perfect body. We forget that we all are perfect as we are. We are perfection personified. Look around you. Look at nature. Isn’t everything just perfect? Does a baboon think that it is ugly? Does the lotus flower look down upon other less magnificent flowers?

Speaking of flowers, I was so visibly shaken out of my complacence when my husband photographed some insignificant tiny wild flowers (that I always completely ignored, as they were non-existent in my list of pretty flowers), with his high-powered fancy camera. The enlarged pictures were amazingly beautiful. The designs were intricate and the colours eclectic. In a moment, I was transformed. How could I ever imagine that the hand of nature would ignore these tiny wild things the way I (and many others like me) do so often? Mother Nature had spent some quality time with these tiny tots. How is it possible then that the same Mother Nature has not done exactly the same (or something even better!) with her most advantaged offspring- the human being?

It is high time that we acknowledge our magnificence and be thankful for it. The best part of this entire learning is that the moment we make this paradigm shift, our cells start rejoicing in their work that they carry on in any case, under all circumstances. Now they do this work with more vigour and enthusiasm. Don’t you work enthusiastically when your efforts are acknowledged and praised? The same rule applies to our tireless, toiling cells.

Try this out. Start your day by admiring your body. Look into the mirror and admire your beauty. Say aloud, “I am beautiful.” Why is it so difficult to mouth this phrase? We have been noticing our broad noses, narrow foreheads, thin lips, sagging skin with such derision everyday that we stop well short of calling ourselves beautiful. It seems like a lie, but believe me nothing could be truer than this. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. The Lord created you in His/Her own image. So if S/He is beautiful, so are you! Try believing in this TRUTH. Try living it. And then, get ready for the magic, because the magic is bound to happen. It is infallible, a given. It works every time. There are no ifs and buts; just a lifetime guarantee. You don’t need to visit any beauty parlours. You don’t need to splurge on beauty potions. You don’t need to go under the surgeon’s scalpel. You don’t need to go anywhere, because being beautiful is your birthright. It is factored in your DNA. Believe that you are beautiful; as you well know that nature can create nothing but perfection.

The same truism applies to ageing. You are ever renewing. You are always new. Just believe in your immortal Self. We age because we think that we must be ageing. We are programmed from a very early age that we all grow ‘old’. We are told (and we accept it, as we ‘see’ the evidence all around us) that as we grow ‘old’ our hair turns grey, our teeth fall out, we become senile, illnesses haunt us, etc.

The only difference between ‘aged’ and ‘eternally young’ is that the latter always know that they are part of a larger reality, and look forward to living their lives to the fullest, while the former believe that they are under the ‘control’ of external forces and dwell upon their ‘lost youth’ while waiting for ‘age’ to take its toll. In both cases their ‘expectations’ are impressed upon the subconscious mind, and faithfully delivered without exception.

Which category do you belong to? Would you like to change your ‘look’? The remedy is very simple; just change your ‘outlook’.

“Really, God?” you asked.

“Yes,” He said.

“Wow, am I so great? Am I a designer model?”

“Yes. And let me tell you, I promise never ever to make anyone like you in the future, too.”

Do you ever realize that there never was and there never will be a person like you? You are unique.

You enter this planet with that high a self-esteem. However, that doesn’t last long. The first person who punctures that self-esteem is generally the mother. Very unknowingly, very lovingly, with a lot of ignorance, the mother starts on a long journey of damaging the self-esteem. Imagine a 3 months young (I hate to say old. Before you can become young, the English language makes you old) baby sitting on the carpet. The baby pees on the carpet. He is playing in that liquid and enjoying himself till the mother storms in screaming at the top of her voice, “What have you done? You have spoilt my carpet worth Rs. 20000.” The baby does not understand the language, has no idea of what a carpet is, and does not understand what Rs 20000 is. All that he can make out is that the mother is annoyed.

This is probably the beginning of the erosion of the high self-esteem the baby came to the world with.

We often decry the child. How many times do we say ‘no’ and ‘don’t’ to a child in a day? Every ‘no’ and ‘don’t’, every negative remark, slices off a part of the high self-esteem. Imagine a child coming from school and joyously telling about his victory and how he scored 100 runs in the school cricket match. The mother will usually respond with “Yes, yes, keep playing cricket. Who will study?” It may be a good idea to share the moment of joy and happiness with the child. You can certainly remind him of the studies later.

A boy came back from the school with his report card. There were 5 A’s and 1B. The mother promptly asked, “What is this B doing here?” When we don’t appreciate the A’s and look at B’s, we dampen the spirits of the boy.

When the child goes to the school, the teacher takes over and reinforces the mother’s effort. The teacher and the parents need to establish synergy in handling the child. The parents need to know how the child behaves at school and the teacher must know what happens at home. This calls for proper exchange of inputs during the PTA meetings.

Your child feels great if he feels wanted, appreciated and loved. He feels great if he is told often that he is great. Conversely, he feels let down and discouraged and lives with a low self-esteem when he is told he does not know anything, does not deserve what he wants. Comparing a child with his siblings and friends can be damaging too. The child loves attention. Spend some time with him. Give him the love and care he deserves, and you will see great results. Self-esteem is reinforced with your encouragement. If you appreciate his decision-making skills and his ideas, he is sure to become a great achiever in life. Respect is another area children are hungry for. Take your child seriously and treat him with respect. Explain to him everything and treat him as an intelligent child. You will be pleasantly surprised with the astounding results.

People who feel good about themselves, produce great results.