Author Archive for Danielle LaPorte

Myths have a way of perpetuating themselves. There are quite a few related to training and learning too. Everyone seems to believe in them. So much so that they have become sacrosanct and no one even bothers to question them.

“There’s no such thing as a mistake.” Ha!

This is one of my favourite New Age doozers. Puhleez. Like, getting hosed because you didn’t get it in writing wasn’t a major drag. And spilling your friend’s secret to the wrong person burnt that bridge to a crisp. Or not saying “yes!” to the one that got away – well, THAT sucked. There are such things as mistakes. Major screw-ups and human stupidity happen to the best of us. The rest of us are in denial.

I once worked with a branding client who had a closet full of clothes fit for a hooker. Purple animal prints, a sequin skirt (with the price tag still on it,) lacey, itty-bitty things. Yet, she told me that her ideal outfit was a crisp white shirt, straight-legged jeans and a single strand of pearls. “I could wear that everyday,” she pined. “You know, Jackie O with a twist.” Uh–huh.

When do you feel like giving up? What discourages you, or tempts you to doubt that sweetness is on the way? Now, write down three remedies for discouragement….lunch with your best friend; a visit to church; dusting off your diplomas, re-reading a love letter, swimming twenty laps; warm soup eaten in silence.

Comparison is crazy-making. It stamps on potential and truth and all the good things you might already have going for you if you weren’t so busy shadow-boxing with the people whom you think have it better. Would you compare a snowflake to a snowflake to decide which was more beautiful and unique? No two snowflakes are the same.

Many productivity books have a drill sergeant running between the lines. Panic! So much to do to organize all that I have to do. The Power of Less is a sweet exception to that. Babauta’s energy is gentle and kind. No whistles. No drills. Just a zen-like understanding of what it takes to honour what’s essential.

The Muse of love, art, cash, strategy, worship, desire, wellness, beauty, business plans. Don’t you adore her? Do you…adore her? Actively? Adore. Muses simply must be adored. They’re as grandiose as they are generous. They like to be respected. If you meet them half way, they’ll give you the moon, the breakthrough concept, the stroke [...]

“So sorry, I’ve been busy.” “I’m just so busy with…” “I’ve been too busy too…” Busy? Get in line. If I ever tell you that, “I’m so sorry that I’ve been too busy to…” then I’ll pay $500 bucks to your favourite charity and get you a year’s supply of Haagen Dazs bars. Of course [...]

Creative types get typecast as meandering goal setters for a reason. They tend to meander. We resist structure (even tho’ we crave it.) We relish spontaneity (even tho’ we’re intrigued by five year goal setting plans.) We tend to be driven by inspiration (when we’re not obsessed with looking good on paper, or to our [...]

Home is a place you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old wanting to get back to – John Ed Pierce My grandfather was Leonard Alphonse Laporte. (Note the small ‘p’ in LaPorte – in high school I decided a capital P was more elegant.) Like most French Canadian grand-daughters, I called him Pepe [...]

The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize. – Robert Hughes A well known painter friend of mine once said that having an art show is like “pulling down your pants in public.” My favourite mystery quote about acting is, “acting is like [...]

A new approach to time management

I think that the better part of mortal coil is snarled in reckoning with how we desire to feel, and what we can’t bear to feel. Knowing how you want to feel is half the journey to liberation. But a funny thing often happens on the way to clarity. We get clear on how we [...]

The Red Wheelbarrow – William Carlos Williams so much depends upon a red wheel barrow glazed with rain water beside the white chickens. So much is because of you. The letters you’ve written and sent, the touches, the kisses, the parties. Every grain of advice, set of directions, every breakfast for guests. That quarter you [...]

In my commitment to live bolder, truer, Me’er, I’ve got to be clear that I am not “a brand.” (Yep, that’s rather strange for a “branding expert” to say.) I earn my living by teaching about what I live. And it never fails that the more transparent I am, the more useful I seem to [...]

This is Part One of a two part exercise. Repeat: this is not a philosophical declaration to carry around in your heart. Rather, it’s a soul-teaser to wind through your bean and shake up some thought forms. The world will go on if : you don’t show up at work. : you don’t post to [...]

A beautiful thing, though simple in its immediate presence, always gives us a sense of depth below depth, almost an innocent wild vertigo as one falls through its levels. Frederick Turner Writing and jamming all day, I need to to wrest my eyes from words and the screen. Even if I’m writing fluidly or fire [...]

If you take the desire for someone to be different out of the equation – you can meet them where they are. You can meet them in the real moment. You can meet them in their despair or their magnificence.

What repels you? Nosy neighbors. Organized religion? Bohemia? Modern design or gold-gilded embellishments? Knowing what does not work for you is a powerful tool for creating more of what does work for you. Measuring positive feelings against negative feelings is one of the constructive ways to use comparison, and it’s a great way to tune [...]

Today is your day of all days… Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You. – Dr. Seuss Birthdays are a big deal. Monumental. Sacred. What could be bigger in your life than the day you were born?! I always feel pouty for someone [...]

“…holding no prisoner to guilt, we become free.” – The Course In Miracles Someone asked me this week, “Have you forgiven so and so for such and such?” And I did the puppy head tilt, “Huh?” This question throws me for a loop. “Well…I don’t really feel like it’s my place to forgive them,” I [...]

You know that the teacher appears when you’re ready. Sometimes it’s a pop tune, or an ad on the bus, sometimes it’s the handy man. Keep your heart open and you’ll recognize the wisdom when it shows up…wearing overalls and fedora.

I worked with a TV producer once who prided herself on being disciplined. “I get up every morning at 5am to run,” she told me over dinner. “I hate it, but it needs to be done.” And she went on to explain that for Lent, she gave up swearing and hadn’t cussed in four years, [...]

One of my best friends and I have a sick tradition. We get excited about each others’ hardship.

get a lot of email and questions in my Fire Starters about the publishing scene. Here are a few hard facts and beautiful possibilities of realizing your dream in the printed book world. In the immortal words of Johnny Cash, “I’ve been everywhere, man.” In terms of the book industry, I’ve agented books; I’ve designed [...]

This phrase works for tragedies and boo boos and bad days. It quells panic. It can create urgency or buy time. It’s effective with strangers and lovers.

Do you know the story about the two stone cutters? When asked what he’s doing, the first man replies, “I’m cutting this stone into bricks.” When the second laborer is asked what he’s doing, he replies, “I’m building a temple.” How much do we do in a day with our nose to the grindstone? Myopic, [...]

We’re so occupied with home improvement and self-improvement that it’s difficult to see the true self that’s underneath. Who are you fixing, anyway? Do you know? Maybe you don’t need improving at all. Perhaps your original self is more beautiful than you even imagined.

How are things? Good. Yeah, good. Fine. Things are fine. Let me ask that question again: How are things? Fabulous. It all feels like an adventure right now. I have synchronicities piling up everywhere. I’ve got all the money I need, in fact, it’s flowing good n’ steady. My skin is glowing. Most nights we [...]

A woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write. Virginia Woolf For about six months, my sweet husband has been saying, “Look babe, if you want me out of the office, just say the word and I’ll make space for myself in the loft.” “It’s alright, I can [...]

The best writing advice I ever received was this: “Sometimes you have to let go of the jewels.” You have to cut out the best part. You have to detach from your brilliance. You have to trust that the whole piece is better the individual shiny parts that make you seem clever or wise. So [...]

Our dreams and desires define us. Be they broken, scarcely remembered, on the verge of reality, or in full bloom. They pilot our choices. Dreams have the power to shape the entire landscape of our lives. Because they tend to be so precious and potent, many people keep their dreams and aspirations to themselves. A [...]

Every pithy page brought from my new very favorite book Ignore Everybody by Hugh MacLeod brought on a yes! MacLeod is a foul-mouthed, illuminated advertising pro, who writes about marketing, meaningful living, and in his own way … love. He is pulled forward by his thrill of “creative sovereignty.” And he’s one pragmatic, sweet curmudgeon. [...]

WARNING: if you’re a hopeless romantic, searching for Prince Charming or Miss Marvelous, you better leave now. Because I’m about steamroll any Disney-drenched happily-ever-after scenario

But I’ve noticed that even shiny, sexy, wide-awake people don’t talk that much about sex. The general conversation starts and stops with whether you’re getting it or not. “It’s good.” “We need to make more time for it.” “Haven’t gotten around to it.”

A friend of mine who was a therapist in a half way house described an incident where this big burly nut-bar barged into a group therapy session hollering and waving his arms around. He was like a beefy Hell’s Angels guy, and he was having one of his meanie episodes that would have scared the [...]

Sparkle Determination ripples out. Your appearance tells the world how to treat you. When you take care of yourself, life tends to pitch in. When you aim to shine, life pays proper attention to you – and that includes your lover boy (or girl.)

One mile south of Georgia O’Keefe’s beloved Ghost Ranch in New Mexico, thirteen miles down a cliff-hugging dirt road in the heart of Chama Canyon, you will find Christ In The Desert. The Benedictine Monastery is cloister to about twenty monks. I’d fantasized about retreating to the remote monastery for about fifteen years. And when [...]

Saraswati, by Pieter Welteverde www.sanatansociety.com Saraswati is my #1 Goddess. She rules what I dig most. I’m surprised she’s not up there with Kali and Aphrodite in mass popularity. Saraswati is regarded as the Goddess of knowledge and the arts. She represents consciousness and wisdom, is regarded as the goddess of sound and speech, and [...]

There’s a great scene in Erin Brokovich where hot biker guy asks Brokovich (played by Julia Roberts and her push-up bra) for her phone number. “You want my number?” she snaps. “How about 3? That’s the number of kids I’ve got. And how about 31? That’s how many days late my rent is. And how [...]

1. Work with people who are smarter or more accomplished than you. In the last month or so I’ve advised a mega-website/magazine that has the #1 community forum on the world wide web, a super savvy duo who are #1 in their industry and have one of the finest business plans I’ve seen; and a [...]

If knowledge is power, than curiosity is the muscle. Focus is a fabulous force. Tho’ sometimes, it’s good to blur the lines and depart from your expertise, your skill set and what you think you know so well. Many a great discovery has come from accidental encounters and seemingly unrelated interests. Choose three subjects that [...]

Here are a few sparks of The Burning Questions that I ask my Fire Starter clients: 1. What do people thank you for most often? What do they come to you for, or say about you most frequently {“positive” or “negative”}? Gratitude leads you back to your strengths. The greatest leverage you have for a [...]

One of the most powerful questions you can ask yourself is: What am I drawn to? Plenty of people are inspirationally challenged – not sure of what lights their fire. Others are so selective about what floats their boat that not much new can get past their preferences. Whether you’re confused or highly particular, curiosity [...]

I’m turning 40 in a few weeks. Bizarre. Surreal. Cannot believe it. Just yesterday I was at ecstatically getting the hell out of high school, wearing shoulder pads and stilettos underneath my graduation gown; knowing full well that the world was my oyster and that extra-hold hair mousse would get me through almost any encounter. [...]

I sigh when I read this book by John O’Donohue. About every three paragraphs I close my eyes and shake my head in awe, as if to say to the gods of philosophy and poetry, “Thank you for this man”! This is a diamond blessing of a book that has become one of my favourite [...]

Tummy trembles. Brain fuzz. That discombobulating feeling that you’re not quite sure what you should be doing but you should be something to keep your act together. Anxiety. Sometimes it slips away with a few deep breaths, other times you need to beat it off with a stick or some little white pills. Naturally, we [...]

Success and failure go hand in hand. “The things you are fired for are often the things that in later life you will be celebrated and given life time achievement awards for!” Francis Ford Coppola was canned for writing an “odd” and awkward script for the now legendary film Patton. The film was shelved, took [...]

This weekend my son and I ended up at a Sand Mandala ceremony guided by Tibetan Monks. I just vaguely remembered that something about monks was going on at the Chinese Gardens, and we just happened to arrive as the ceremony was beginning. And there was a prayer carpet in the front row that was [...]

I’m loving: 1. Rebecca Walker’s perspective on Chris Brown’s violent attack on Rhianna: “This is about relationships and what healthy ones look like,” she told ABC News. “It’s about intimacy and how little we, as a culture, know about cultivating and maintaining it. It’s about love, what it is, and what it isn’t.” 2. This [...]